


Skip It All

by Onyxeuphoria



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: F/F, Fluff, Humor, fun times and happiness
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-23
Updated: 2019-01-05
Packaged: 2019-03-08 09:46:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 20
Words: 57,980
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13455663
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Onyxeuphoria/pseuds/Onyxeuphoria
Summary: What happens when Emma accidentally ends up telling Regina how she feels? Classic fluff and an attempt at humor. (Pretend Emma never became the Dark One) A dash of Snow and Charming. A sprinkle of Ruby. SwanQueen all over the place!





	1. The Slip Up

"Really Miss Swan, your handwriting needs almost as much improvement as your wardrobe."

Emma rolled her eyes at the comment. Regina was going over the paperwork from the station this month, and every five minutes she had another snarky remark.

"Ya know Regina, just because I don't write like I'm from a fairytale land, doesn't mean I don't have good handwriting. And my wardrobe is perfectly fine the way it is. You don't hear me complaining about your handwriting or clothes." Emma propped her feet up on Regina's desk and leaned back.

"Well of course not dear. My handwriting is exquisite and my clothes are top of the line and fit me perfectly." Regina said pushing Emma's feet off of her desk.

Emma couldn't disagree. Everything is perfect about Regina. Her clothes, her handwriting, the little scar on her lip, her cooking. Man her cooking was untouched. The way she raised that perfectly sculpted eyebrow. That smug smirk she always wears. Her love for Henry. Even the way she continuously torchers and talks about Mary Margret was perfect. Let's not even discuss how gorgeously beautiful she is. Just unnecessarily breathtaking. Just freaking perfect. _That's why I'm in love with you…_ Emma thought to herself. She leaned her head back and let out a long sigh. Being around Regina always made it hard for her to control where her thoughts went. No matter what was happening she ended up at the same realization. She was in love with Regina Mills. And she had it bad.

"I'm sorry, what did you say?!"

Emma looked up to see Regina. Shell-shocked, mouth agape, staring.

"Ummm, I didn't say anything. You were saying how perfect your handwriting and clothes were and I just leaned back and didn't respond."

"No, you said "That's why I'm in love with you"…"

Silence.

Now it was Emma's turn to look shocked. She knew she should close her mouth but she couldn't. She knew she should deny it but she couldn't. And if she was being honest with herself, she didn't _want_ to. Nevertheless, she still couldn't get over the fact that she had said that out loud. _Idiot._

They just stared at each other, Emma too afraid to say something and Regina waiting for an explanation. She was rarely rendered speechless but at this moment she didn't know what to say. She had found herself falling in love with Emma more and more even though she tried to ignore it. She knew the blonde could never return her feelings. Or could she? She was growing impatient.

"Well, Miss Swan…care to explain what that was about?"

"No. Can we just forget it happened? Please?" Emma was completely embarrassed, but she could have sworn she saw some type of emotion flicker across Regina's face. She just couldn't place what it was.

"Indeed. I should be used to your random outbursts of meaningless things by now." Regina immediately went back to her paperwork, but her mind was elsewhere. Why would Emma say something like that at this moment? Did she mean it? Was this some sick joke? There was no way she was going to be able to concentrate for the rest of this meeting.

"Oh no, I meant it. I just didn't mean to say it out loud." Emma isn't sure where this inch of confidence came from but she was tired of hiding her feelings.

Regina dropped her pen, but kept her eyes on the paperwork. _This isn't real. This isn't happening. I must be dreaming._

"Look Regina, I know I'm an idiot, and Snow White's and Charming's daughter. And I know I'm messy and sometimes irresponsible and basically a child stuck in a grown woman's body to you, but I am in love with you. I know because when I look at you, I feel like I finally found a home. I don't feel like an orphan, or a Savior, or a hero. I just feel like me. When I'm away from you, all I can do is think about you. Every night when I'm lying in bed, I have to stop myself from calling you, or from poofing myself into your room to hold you while you sleep...Wait! That sounds creepy…" Emma let out a sigh. "Look, I'm not in love with the idea of you, I'm in love with every single part of you. The part of you that's rude and irritable and sassy. The part that's broken and fragile and sensitive. The part that's loving and kind and sweet. The parts that are a secret to everyone. I'm in love with who you used to be, who you are, and who you will be. I'm in love with the Evil Queen. I'm in love with the Mayor. I'm in love with Henry's mother. But most importantly, I'm in love with Regina Mills. Because that's who you are to me. You're not what everyone thinks you are, you're you. Without the fairytale land, without the town, even without being a mother, to me you're just Regina. And whether you return these feeling for me or not, Regina Mills will always be more than enough for me."

Emma finally stops pacing and just stands there. Her eyes shut closed as she realizes she just poured her heart out and she doesn't want to see the look on Regina's face. _Seriously, what was I thinking?_ Suddenly she feels a set of arms around her neck and a set of lips on hers. The scent captivates her immediately. _Chocolate and apples._

 _Regina Mills is kissing me. Sexy, gorgeous, intelligent, woman of my dreams, REGINA MILLS is kissing me._ The kiss is passionate, yet simple. Not too long, not too short, just perfect. Like the woman standing in front of her.

They stand there, foreheads pressed together, Emma's eyes closed, and Regina adoring the idiot in front of her.

"Em-

"Regina, I swear if this is a dream, I'm gonna wake up crying and frustrated."

Regina laughed. Like actually let out a hearty laugh. Emma, opened her eyes to witness such a glorious thing.

"Trust me, if this was a dream we'd be doing a lot more than just standing here." Regina begins playing with Emma's hair. She has so much to say, but doesn't exactly know how to say it.

Emma notices the look on Regina's face. Thoughtful. Regina was in deep thought. Which only made Emma nervous. _Crap._

"Regina wh-"

"Emma I-"

They spoke simultaneously. Both then offering the other to go.

Emma starts rubbing circles into Regina's lower back as they stand there. "Go ahead Regina."

Regina takes a deep breath before she makes eye contact with Emma again. _Well, it's now or never. You're a Queen. You can do this._

"Emma…You're an idiot,"

_Ouch._

"and I love that about you. I know what that word is supposed to mean. I know its synonyms are stupid, dumb, moronic, etcetera etcetera. But Emma, when I call you an idiot, the only synonyms that come to my mind are brave, courageous, beautiful, loving, forgiving, kind, and just overall magnificent. That may not make since to you, but it makes perfect since to me. The first time I thought you were an idiot was when you were saving my life. Because I thought logically, you HAD to be stupid to even think about saving me. But then you kept saving me, and being there for me, and I realized you aren't stupid. You're just brave and courageous. And then I look at you and you're this beautiful goddess that loves my son, and your parents. And then even when you forgave me for everything I've done, I KNEW you had to be idiotic, but no, you're just loving and kind and gentle and understanding. Completely magnificent…and I love magnificent things Emma. You…you give idiot a new meaning to me and I love that. I love you Emma. Not the Savior. Not the hero. Not the White Knight. Just Emma. I love you because when you do something, you give it your all. I love that you don't let people change your mind easily. I love that you don't care that I hate this atrocious red jacket, or that coffin on wheels you refer to as a car. I love that you speak your mind, even when you don't really think about it before you say it. I love how you act like a child but can easily turn into an adult when necessary. I love that you're an idiot. _My idiot._ I love you, for you. I'm in love with you Emma. And the fact that you can love me makes me love you even more. "

There was a long silence. Both of them looking into each other's eyes. A wide grin spread across Emma's face.

"You called me Emma…like 6 times."

"Really?! That's what you got from that? I swear yo-"

Pink lips smashed against red ones. Regina instantly forgetting what she was fussing about. Emma licked along Regina's bottom lip and slowly slid her tongue in. Both sets of lips moved in sync, both tongues fighting for dominance passionately, slowly, lovingly. Emma pulled away slowly, looking at Regina, as if nothing else in the world mattered.

"Ya know, I always did like it when you called me an idiot. But now that I know what it means, I definitely love it…Regina, we're in love with each other."

Regina raised her eyebrow and smirked.

"I am completely aware of that, I'm guessing you have a point dear?"

"Sooo…does that mean you're my girlfriend now? Or are you gonna make me work for it? I mean, I know you're from the Enchanted forest and people probably get married after having such a revelation, but I'd rather take it slow ya know?"

Regina crossed her arms and leaned back against her desk. Smirk still in place. Emma knew she was screwed now. _Fugghhh._

"Well dear, you're correct about the way marriage worked in the Enchanted Forest. People did get married rather quickly back then, but that was mainly imbeciles that did that…Including your parents. But to answer your question, I hadn't planned on making you work for it. I just figured we would go out on a proper date now. But I like your idea better." Regina walked around her desk and took a seat, propping her feet up on her desk and leaning back in her chair. "I expect to be wooed Miss Swan. Flowers, chocolates, fancy dinners, the whole shebang. I am a Queen after all. Afterwards, I'll give you an answer on whether or not we're in a relationship. You have to earn the right to call me your girlfriend."

Emma stared at her. Mouth agape. Slightly distracted by Regina's legs on the desk, not to mention the red pumps she had on. _This woman will be the death of me._

"Regina! Are you serious?! Tell me you're kidding…"

They stared each other down for a few more seconds before a wide, smile broke out over Regina's face, and she walked towards Emma.

"Of course I'm kidding dear. However, the look of your face was quite amusing. Of course I'll be your girlfriend and you'll be mine."

Emma let out a breath she didn't even know she was holding.

"Hmmm, I like the sound of that. But you know what? I'm gonna woo you anyway. And I'm gonna give you everything you want because you're worth it. And I'm gonna give you a happy ending, by being your happy ending, because you deserve to be happy. And to start that off, I'm going to take you to dinner tonight. I'm going to treat you like the Queen you are. I'm going to give you the things you didn't even know you wanted. Because you're Regina Mills. And Regina Mills, my girlfriend, deserves *kiss* the *kiss* very *kiss* best *kiss*. And I'm going to give it to you."

Regina pulled Emma in for another kiss.

"My, my, my that Charming gene is extremely strong right now." Regina cleared her throat. "Speaking of Charming, I get to be there when you tell your parents."

Emma blinked. She hadn't even thought about that. They would have to tell Henry too, which didn't bother her, but her parents? More importantly, Mary Margaret, would definitely cause a scene. She rolled her eyes just thinking about it.

"First of all, never mention my parents again while we're making out. Secondly, fine. But can we do it tomorrow? I'm really not in the mood for Mary Margaret's drama right now."

Regina let out a sigh and crossed her arms. She was looking forward to seeing the look of horror that would be on Snow's face.

"Fine, dear. I guess that gives me enough time to prepare for such an event."

Emma rolled her eyes. _I should have known she would want to torture my mom…Snow…Mary Mar…eh whatever._

"Gina, this is not an opportunity for you to torture my parents. Specifically Mary Margaret. Don't go home writing out things to say and do to torture her. I just want it to go by quickly and painlessly."

Regina tilted her head to the side as she looked at Emma. _Did she just…?_

"What did you just call me?"

A proud grin spread across the younger woman's face.

"Gina."

"And you're shortening my name because?" Regina lifted an eyebrow and tried to mask the blush she felt rising in her cheeks.

"Cause it's cute. And so are you. Actually you're far from cute. You're gorgeous. But also cute. Okay I'm rambling. Anywaysss, it's the nickname I call you. Well, I've never actually called you "Gina" in real life, but I do in my head. Do you like it?" Emma cast a knowing smirk towards the older woman.

 _She's been calling me nicknames in her head? Such a goofball. She called me cute. CUTE. No one has ever called me cute before. Ugh, why do I have this feeling from her just calling me cute? I don't even do cute. Regina get it together, like honestly._ Regina pretended to be busy looking at her perfectly manicured nails, trying to control the butterflies in her stomach & seem nonchalant.

"Hmmm, I suppose." The brunette finally looked up and made eye contact with the blonde, catching the smug look directed towards her. She rolled her eyes. "So dear, where are we going for dinner? Please tell me somewhere other than Granny's."

Emma backed away from her girlfriend and smirked again.

"Nope. I'm not telling you. It's a surprise. Just be ready by 7 o'clock. I'll come pick you up. Wear something casual. _CASUAL_ Regina. As in jeans and a sweater or something. No heels! Okay? I'm about to woo you off your feet woman!"

Emma leaned forward and pecked the older woman on the cheek. "Bye Gina! Remember 7 o'clock! Love you!"

Emma was out of the door before Regina could object to any of her demands. She knew Regina would protest to wearing jeans, so she didn't give her a chance to. Emma looked at her watch. _2:50pm. Okay Swan. Only a few hours to set up the perfect date._ She got in her car and headed to go see her best friend Ruby. She had some planning to do.


	2. CASUALly Nervous

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Part One of the date!

_**6:15pm** _

**Emma:** Is everything ready?

 **Rubes:** I just rolled my eyes sooo hard. YES! Dude it'll b fine! Ur going above & beyond. Im sure she'll love it.

 **Emma:** I hope so. Im so nervous.

 **Rubes:** Emmaaaaa! 2day u tld me that Regina…REGINA EFFIN MILLS, tld u she was in love w/ u! U kno what that means?! It means she's already accptd u! Just b urself. Take a chill pill.

 **Emma:** You're totally right! I could show up in sweatpants and a t-shirt and she would still love me right?

 **Rubes:** I didn't say tht

 **Emma:** …Oh

 **Rubes:** Dude, plz tell me tht u r dressed  & not sittin in sweatpants & a tshirt.

 **Emma:** …I cant tell you that.

 **Rubes:** DUDE WTF! It's almost 7!

 **Emma:** Idk what to wear! She should accept me as I am. Clothes dnt make the woman! Plus I told her the dress code was casual, so technically what im wearing is fine.

 **Rubes:** …I'm coming over.

* * *

**6:30pm**

Regina begins to get nervous. Emma would be there to pick her up in 30 minutes and she still wasn't ready. She stood there in her robe and looked through her closet for the 4th time. She already had out her black low-top Chuck Taylors that Henry had gotten her last Christmas in an attempt to get her to "loosen up and chill", so she figured those would work. She didn't have any jeans, but she did have some black leather pants that we're most definitely casual. She just needed a shirt to complete the outfit.

She heard the front door downstairs open and close, which only meant one thing…

"Mom! I'm home!" Henry knocked on her door and entered.

Regina rolled her eyes and went back to her search. "I see that you've picked up yelling and barging in uninvited from your other mother. How was school and studying with Grace today?"

"Sorry Mom." Henry plopped on the bed and looked at his mom looking in the closet. "and school was school. Studying went okay. We studied at Granny's as always. But speaking of Ma, I saw her earlier when she stopped by the diner and she told me to tell you that you better be ready and _CASUAL!_ She told me to over exaggerate the word "casual" when I said it. Soooo, why do you need to be _CASUAL?_ What's going on?"

"Well, Henry we're going somewhere this evening. Where? I'm not sure of the whereabouts simply because Miss Swan refuses to tell me."

Henry stared at the pants and chucks on the bed. _This is weird._ "Mom?…what's going on? There's something you're not telling me."

Regina pinched the bridge of her nose and stopped to look at her son. He was staring in disbelief, yet had an inquisitive look on his face.

"Henry, I'll tell you when Emma gets here. Right now however, I need to find a shirt to wear."

"Emma?..." the young brunette muttered to himself. He rarely ever heard his mom call Emma by her name. This was a big deal. Henry went to his room and got one of his nice white v-neck shirts that he never wore anymore, since he had grown out of them. He then retreated back to his mother's room.

"Here Mom." He threw the shirt on the bed. "Wear this. It'll fit you perfectly and it goes with the pants and chucks." He went to her closet and pulled out her black vest. "And wear this on top of it. It'll look good. And let's face it. This is about as _CASUAL_ as it gets for you right now. But I think you can pull it off."

Regina picked up the shirt. She would need to iron it, but it would have to do. "Thank you sweetheart. This will do perfectly." She watched Henry leave and started to get dressed. She had 10 minutes to spare.

* * *

**6:45pm**

"What are you looking at?" Emma asked as she put on her shoes.

Ruby grinned. "Just admiring my work. You look bangin! I'd do you myself if you weren't my bestfriend." Ruby winked.

Emma chuckled. "Thanks Rubes, really." She picked up her jacket and headed to the door. "Maj is downstairs right?" Ruby nodded. "Okay cool. Well here I go!" Emma opened the door to leave. "I'll text you when I get there. Do you remember what you're supposed to do?"

Ruby scoffed. "Yes! Bring the food. Bring headphones and music so I can't hear you guys' conversation. And don't speak. Got it. NOW GO!" Ruby pushed her best friend out of the door.

* * *

**6:55pm**

Luckily the pants didn't need ironing, so she slipped those on and her shoes. She hated to admit it, but the Chucks were more comfortable than she anticipated. She was fully dressed with 5 minutes to spare. _Perfect_. She headed downstairs and made her way to the kitchen with her purse in one hand, while putting on her other earring.

"Woah!"

Regina turned around to see Henry looking at her with a slice of pizza hanging out of his mouth.

"Does it look that bad Henry?" Regina started to straighten out her shirt.

"No no no, Mom you look great! You should wear _CASUAL_ clothes more often. Be honest, it feels good to be dressed down for once right?!" Henry kept eating but looked at her expectantly.

Regina nodded and rolled her eyes. "Yes it really does. This t-shirt is comfortable and so are these Chuck Taylors. I may wear these more often, as soon as I-"

The doorbell rang, cutting Regina off mid-sentence. She instantly became nervous. She was so worked up about her clothes, that she hadn't thought about the fact that she was about to go on a date with her new girlfriend. Emma Swan. Her girlfriend. Who she was in love with. Who was in love with her. _Emma._

Henry ran to open the door.

"Hey Ma! Come on in!"

"Is your Mom ready? How does she look? How do I look? God I'm so effin nervous!"

Henry put his hand on her shoulder. "Ma! You look fine! Mom is ready. She's in the kitchen, and she is _CASUAL_ , don't worry. Gesh, you act like this is a date or something."

Emma cleared her throat and walked forward. She wanted to tell Henry with Regina, not beforehand.

"Wait… _is_ this a date? Oh my Gosh it is! You're blushing!"

"Who's blushing?" Regina entered the foyer with a glass of water in her hand.

Emma froze. Regina was wearing a white v-neck t-shirt, which gave a little peek of cleavage, a black vest, tight leather pants, with… Emma's eyes widened. _BLACK CHUCK TAYLORS?!_ Regina looked drop dead gorgeous. Emma had to catch her breath a little bit.

"Woah…Regina you look… _ **Woah**_ "

Regina rolled her eyes, but noticed the butterflies swarming in her stomach. "You already said that dear. But I must say you look "Woah" yourself."

Emma was wearing her dark blue skinny jeans, a skin tight black t-shirt that showed a little of her stomach, a black blazer, and her black Doc Martins.

Emma and Regina both started walking towards each other. Both having in mind one thing, until they heard a throat being cleared.

They both turned to see Henry look at them.

"Yeah, Hi. So are you all gonna tell me what's going on?" Henry knew they were about to go on a date, but he wanted to hear it from them. _This is too good to be true._

Emma looked at Regina, and Regina looked at Emma.

"I'm telling my parents. You could at least tell your son." Emma said to the older woman.

"He's your son too dear, but fine." Regina sat her drink down on the nearby table, turned to Henry and smiled. "Henry, earlier today your mother and I discovered that we have romantic feelings for each other. So now my _girlfriend_ is taking me on a date. That is what's happening."

Henry stared at them for a long time before a wide grin spread across his face and he jumped in the air.

"YES! Finally! It took you guys long enough! Now listen, I know this is new for both of you so take your time and don't rush into anything before you're ready. I expect you back by 11 o'clock and not a minute later. Ma, keep your hands to yourself, Mom you too. Now get out of here and have fun. Love you, bye." Henry pushed his two mothers out the door and locked it.

Emma stared at the door and then turned to Regina.

"Did he just…give us a speech?"

"Did he say finally?"

Emma grabbed Regina's hand and started walking down the pathway.

"Well…that's our son. So are you excited about our first date?"

Regina leaned her head on Emma's shoulder as they walked. "Well I am, but I would be more excited if you told me where we were going."

Emma smiled. "Well gorgeous. The best things are worth waiting for. And speaking of waiting, your chariot awaits."

They turned the corner to see a beautiful black horse.

Regina touched the horses face and smiled when the horse stepped towards her.

"This is Maj. He's my horse. I've had him for about 4 months." Emma said.

"Emma he's beautiful. Why and when in the world did you get a horse? And how am I just now hearing about it?!"

Emma mounted her horse and held her hand out for Regina. "Well join me and I'll tell you."

Regina got up behind Emma and wrapped her arms around Emma's waist. After she was settled, Maj started walking in the direction Emma wanted.

"Well, about 5 months ago, I was out on patrol one night in the woods, looking for Pongo unsurprisingly. I ran across Maj here, and he was weak and sick and pretty hurt. I took him back to the stables, which Ruby had to tell me where the stables were because I didn't even know we had stables. But anyway, I took him back and Joe said Maj had been missing for days. After that night, I started going to see him every day. I wanted to make sure he was getting better."

They stopped and Emma got off helping Regina down afterwards. Once Maj was tied up, they started walking towards the docks.

"Day by day, Maj started to get stronger. Joe said it was because I was spending time with him. I would go out there during my lunch break and eat with him. About a month later, Maj was back to normal. Well better than normal according to Joe. But by then I was so in love with the dang horse that I just couldn't leave it. So I bought him from Joe. He didn't want me to pay on account of everything I had done, but I insisted."

They walked in silence for a while before Regina spoke up.

"So why the name Maj? What does it mean?" Regina watched as a grin spread across Emma's face.

"Well because he reminds me of you, Your _MAJ_ esty."

Regina's eyes widened and her eyebrows flew into her hairline.

"And in what ways does this horse remind you of me?" Regina asked.

"I'll answer that later, because right now we're going to have dinner."


	3. Full of Surprises

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Part Two of the date!

Emma whistled and before her eyes, Regina saw the dock light up and soft music started to play. There was a table set up with a rose in the center and two candles beside it. Emma pulled out a chair for Regina and gestured for her to sit down. Once Emma was seated herself, Ruby came, ( _with headphones on?_ ), and placed a salad in front of each of them, with their preferred dressings. Regina looked up to see Emma looking at her with a knowing grin.

"Impressed Madam Mayor?"

Regina raises an eyebrow. As much as she hates to admit it, she is. Emma Swan didn't seem like the planning type. If anything, she thought the blonde would just wing it like always. _Surprise surprise_.

"Highly Sheriff. You continue to surprise me. How did you know what kind of dressing I like?" Regina asked as she took a bite of the salad.

"A little wolfie told me." Emma winked. "So Regina, tell me something I don't know about you."

Regina's eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

"Look Regina, this is a date. So I expect us to get to know each other in ways we already don't. I feel like we know a lot of serious stuff about each other, so tonight I want to tone it down a bit with the serious conversation and get to know Regina Mills. Reggie Mill-Mill. Lil' Milly. GinaMina." The blonde put on a goofy grin.

"Never. Ever. _Ever,_ speak any of those horrid names again. And fair enough. But why do I have to go first?"

"Ah, simple. I already went. You didn't know I had a horse, now you know why and how. So, it's your turn." Emma wiggled her eyebrows playfully.

"Fine, Miss Swan. Something you don't know about me…" Regina ran through a list out things before she came up with something good. "Ah, okay you'll like this one. I keep four different types of Poptarts in my room under my bed. And I eat them within two weeks…all of them."

Emma's eyes widened as expected.

"Wait a minute. Hold up. Stop. You mean to tell me that Regina-Healthy Eater-Mills eats Poptarts?! Four different flavors? In two weeks? Like all four boxes?" Regina nodded. "Wow. I need some time to process this. Okay, so what flavors do you like?"

Regina chuckled but paused as their entrees came out. Chicken Parmesan and fettuccini alfredo. _Impressed once again._ She had definitely expected burgers from Granny's when she saw Ruby.

"Well, I tried all of the flavors when I first got here, but the only flavors I really love are Brown Sugar Cinnamon, Strawberry, Cookies n' Cream, and Chocolate Chip."

"Hmmm, okay okay. I respect that. Those are A plus flavors." There was silence for a while, both women lost in their meal and thoughts. Emma spoke up. "Okay let's do this. We're going to take turns saying random things about ourselves, whether they're embarrassing or funny or just random facts about the stuff we like. We won't ask questions. We just say it, and then it'll be the other person's turn. We can play while we eat, so we have time to think. Cool?" Emma said as she took a few bites of her food.

"Sounds reasonable."

They both begin eating again. It was quite a while before either of them said anything.

"I used to eat crayons when I was a kid. But I would only eat certain colors because they tasted the best." Emma confessed shyly.

Regina scrunched up her nose in disgust and smiled at finding Emma looking quite embarrassed by her confession.

"A few years after I got here, I sprang my wrist while attempting to learn how to breakdance."

Emma choked on the pasta she had in her mouth. Once she caught her breath she looked up at Regina.

"I wanna ask so many questions about that."

"Well you can't. Your rules."

"Okay okay. I'll go. But give me time to think." Emma tilted her head and thought for a moment.

Regina took this time to really look at the woman sitting in front of her. The way the lights hit her face and hair made it look like she was glowing. _God, Regina get it together, and stop the sappy crap. You're as bad as Snow._ But Regina knew she couldn't help herself. She hadn't felt this way since Daniel. Emma made her feel so comfortable and free to be herself. She could be her goofy, relaxed self with Emma, and she had no doubt Emma would still love her. _Slow down Regina you all just confessed your love for each other TODAY. It's only the first date. Take it slow._ Regina's thoughts were interrupted.

"Okay, here we go. When I find a book I might like, I read it in a day or two easily. My record is 19 books in a month."

Regina blinked. Well now she had questions. Emma completely surprised her with that confession. _She is just full of surprises tonight. Well two can play at that game._ "I'm a humungous Black Widow fan. To be specific, a Scarlett Johansson fan. I have the Black Widow costume in my closet." Regina sat back and smirked.

Emma looked up to see the challenge in the brunette's eyes _. She's trying to surprise me more than I surprise her. She's trying to out-surprise me! Wait, is that a term? Out-surprise? Or is it over-surprise? …eh whatever. Challenge accepted._ Emma leaned forward a tad bit and narrowed her eyes at the woman across from her. "I love brussel sprouts. They're like little balls of cabbage and I love cabbage. Also, they're cute."

Regina leaned forward matching Emma's determined face. "I have every "Bring It On" movie and I know all of the chorography to Every. Single. Movie."

"I watch the discovery channel every night."

"I was absolutely terrified of microwaves when I came here."

"I started reading the dictionary when I met you."

Regina leaned forward a little more and looked Emma deep in the eyes and smiled. "I have a hidden strip pole in my bedroom." Regina winked.

Emma was a bit taken aback, but she pressed forward trying to ignore the heat in her stomach and the images in her head. _Duly noted._ _Okay Swan, go in for the kill._

"I've been playing pranks on Mary Margret almost every day and she has yet to figure out it's me."

Regina froze mouth agape.

"Y-You what?"

Emma smiled and pulled out her phone, trying to hide her excitement from winning _. Finally I beat Regina at something. Me, Emma Swan, the true hero._

"Yep! Look. These are pictures of her reactions."

Regina snatched Emma's phone and begin scrolling through said pictures. Emma sat back and sipped her drink triumphantly.

"Emma…these are…when did you…how long have you been doing this? Pranks of what kind?!"

Emma shrugged. "For about a month now. I've done simple stuff like fill Oreos with toothpaste, covered paper towels in baby powder, made all of her clothes bigger and longer so she would think she was shrinking, subscribed to all the porn channels on her TV, filled a mayo jar with vanilla pudding and vice versa, changed all her songs on her jogging playlist to "Eye of the Tiger", just stuff like that." Emma chuckled remembering how Mary Margaret had reacted to her clothes getting bigger. She had gone to see Whale 3 times since then.

Regina stared at her girlfriend with the biggest smile on her face. "So is this what you were referring to last week when you told me you had been practicing your magic on "home projects"?"

Emma nodded as Ruby collected their plates and brought out two pieces of hot apple pie with vanilla ice cream. Regina still shocked at the information she just received, took a bite of the pie. _Mmmm, so warm and sweet. Still not as superb as my recipe however._ "So what did you do to your mother today?"

Emma grinned. "Well, that's the last surprise I have for you. I haven't done anything today. So I figured you'd be more than willing to help me."

Regina jumped up and with a wave of her hand the dock was back to normal and she and Emma's desserts were in to-go boxes. Ruby appeared with a questioning look and took off her headphones. "What exactly just happened? Dude did you mess it up and say something stupid?" Ruby asked looking towards her bestfriend.

"Miss Lucas, you can go take yourself for a walk or whatever it is you do in your spare time. Thank you for your service, but Miss Swan and I will be leaving now." Regina pulled Emma towards the horse and immediately got on, leaving a smirking Ruby.

Emma looked up at her girlfriend and smiled. "Ya know Regina, if I didn't know any better I'd say you were actually excited about this. I don't think I've ever seen you excited about something."

Regina rolled her eyes dramatically. "Yes, well tonight has been an explosion of surprises, Miss Swan. Now are you going to mount this thing so we can be on our way or will I have the pleasure of doing this myself?"

Emma rolled her eyes and suppressed a giggle. "First of all, don't "Miss Swan" me. I think we're way past that now." Emma got up behind Regina and placed her hands on Regina's legs. "Secondly, we're doing this TOGETHER. But apparently you already have an idea so shoot. What is it?"

Regina motioned for Maj to go and they took off in a trot towards the Charming's apartment.

"Well, I'm sure you're familiar with the old joke where someone opens the door and paint or some liquid falls on them?" Emma looked at the back of Regina's head skeptically. "Mhmm. What about it?"

Regina grinned. "Well, Henry has a rather large collection of marbles and I-"

"REGINA! I just want to prank her! Not kill her or send her to the freaking hospital! Gosh woman!"

Regina rolled her eyes and let out a scoff. "Well the rules weren't specific dear, but fine. Do you have any grand ideas?"

"Well I was thinking about filling all of the cleaning products with Gatorade. Like switching Windex with blue Gatorade and stuff, so when she cleans everything will be sticky." Emma chuckled at the idea of it.

"Honestly Emma that's child's play. But it'll do for now. In addition to that however, can we cover everything in the apartment in Saran Wrap? Actually no, let's super glue everything!"

Emma shook her head. _This woman._ _It's like I just gave a kid a shopping spree to the candy store._ "Woah woah woah Gina calm down. We can't use up all the ideas in one night. But I do like your ideas. I say tonight we super glue everything."

Regina slowed down as the Charming's place came into view. "Perfect."

They rode in silence for a few minutes before Regina spoke. "Emma…you still never told me how this horse reminds you of me."

The blonde put her chin on Regina's shoulder and wrapped her arms around the older woman's waist.

"I know. I'm going to tell you later. But I'm sure if you think about it, you'll figure it out before I tell you."


	4. Kisses, Pranks, and Jokes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Part Three of the Date!

They pulled up to the Charming residence and once they were on the ground, Emma started to head in. However, she was stopped by Regina pulling her arm.

"Emma, what are you doing?"

"Um, going in, Regina. What are YOU doing? We have to go in there in order to do the prank. Duh!"

Regina raises an eyebrow and folded her arms, making Emma gulp.

"If you wish to remain in a relationship with me, _Miss Swan_ , then I suggest you never talk to me as if I'm inept again. Now that that's cleared, I was simply going to suggest that we use magic to enter, in order to avoid waking up the two idiots. I would think you'd be stealthier seeing as how you were a criminal AND had to catch criminals. I suppose you missed that day at bail bondsperson school, when they taught discretion."

Emma scoffed and rolled her eyes. Regina did have a point though.

"I'm very good at being discreet thank you very much. And once again, you can't call me "Miss Swan" unless we're getting it on or if I set your house on fire or something. But anyway, yeah you have a point. Go ahead and poof us in there."

Regina rolled her eyes. "Always so eloquent dear."

Before Emma could reply she felt a tingling and the purple smoke engulfed them. When she opened her eyes, she was in her room. "We could call ourselves the Power _poof_ Girls." Emma chuckled at her attempted joke.

Regina simply rolled her eyes at the blonde and took off her vest. Emma couldn't help but notice how nice and toned Regina looked. She also noticed how she could kind of see the black, lace bra through Regina's shirt. _Focus Swan!_ Emma cleared her throat. "Okay Regina, Let's go ahead and get this done. Our son did give us a curfew and I would hate to disrespect his wishes and come off as anything but the gentlewoman I am." Emma batted her eyelashes and pulled Regina in for a quick kiss.

Regina chuckled and wrapped her arms around Emma's neck. "Yes, well if you keep this night going this perfectly I might have to end up breaking curfew." Regina kissed Emma's jaw line and then pulled back when she heard a soft moan escape Emma's mouth. The brunette smirked. "Okay well enough of that, we have more important things to do. I'll do the magic in the kitchen and the bedroom. You do the rest of the house. We'll meet back here in 5 minutes."

Before Emma could reply, Regina was headed downstairs. _How dare she leave me all hot and bothered! That woman truly is evil._ Emma went around the house and completed her part of the job. She had to admit that super gluing everything was a genius plan. _Of course it's a genius plan; Regina Mills came up with it. MM is gonna lose her mind tomorrow._ She headed back to her room to see that Regina was already there.

"Took you long enough. Alright, let's go check your work."

Emma scoffed and rolled her eyes. "I've been doing this by myself all this time. I think I did it perfectly thank you. And I checked it myself. I can't lift anything, which means I did it correctly." Emma put on a smug grin.

Regina looked at Emma and tilted her head.

"You couldn't lift anything? Dear, that means you did it incorrectly. The spell is supposed to superglue everything so that _Snow_ can't pick it up. Everyone else should be able to function as usual."

Emma's eyes widened. _Ohhh._

"Ohhh…"

"Emma really. Please try to keep up. You're in the big leagues now." Regina headed downstairs and Emma followed.

"Oh so I guess you're the big leagues huh?" Emma whispered.

"Certainly dear. I thought that was obvious. Now let's correct this spell."

* * *

It takes less than 10 minutes for Emma to correct everything and get back outside. Emma let's Regina mount Maj first and spends the rest of the ride telling Regina jokes, attempting to get the brunette to laugh and admit she was funny. Once they arrive back at Regina's mansion, Emma walks her to the door.

"Okay okay, what about this one? Knock Knock."

Regina let out and overdramatic sigh.

"Who's there?"

"Nobody."

"Nobody who?"

"…"

"…"

"…"

Regina suppressed a chuckle and cleared her throat. "Honestly Emma, you need to work on your material. Don't quit your day job to become a comedienne. I assure you, I'll be the first one there to throw the tomatoes."

They continued to walk up the path to the door, both slowing their footsteps not wanting the night to come to an end.

"Awh, come on Gina, I know for a FACT that joke is hilarious! But fine, you think my jokes aren't funny? I challenge you. Tell me a joke, Madam Mayor."

Regina thought for a second and a grin spread across her face.

"Okay Sheriif, Challenge accepted. Why did the two koalas fall out of the tree?"

Emma thought for a moment. "I don't know, why?"

"They were dead. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree?"

"Really Regina?! That's super morbid."

Regina rolled her eyes. "Just answer the question. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree?"

"Um…it was dead too?"

"No, peer pressure. Why did Johnny fall off of the swing?"

Emma stopped and looked at the brunette. "Regina, I swear if you say this kid was dead…"

Regina chuckled, and looked at Emma. "Answer the question. Why did Johnny fall off of the swing?"

"I don't know, why?"

"He got hit in a the head by a koala. Why did Suzie fall off the swing?"

Emma stared at Regina with a look of horror on her face. "God, I don't even wanna guess. Why did Suzie fall off the swing Regina?"

"She had no arms. Knock Knock."

"…"

"Emma come on! Knock knock!"

"Who's there?"

"Not Suzie!" And then Regina doubled over in laughter. Like straight up loud laughter.

Emma stared at the older woman. Speechless and mouth hanging open. _What kind of joke...?!_

"Regina!"

That only made Regina laugh louder. She finally caught her breath and looked at Emma. "Oh come on! That joke is hilarious! Henry loves it!"

"You told that joke to Henry?!"

Regina calmed down from laughter and put her hand on Emma's shoulder. "Oh do calm down, dear. And actually he told me the joke a few years ago. I laughed for two days straight after that. That joke is what I call quality comedy."

Emma shook her head. "I don't think dead koalas and little girls with no arms constitutes as a joke Regina."

Regina rolled her eyes as they made it to the door. "Fine, I'll tell another."

Emma looked skeptical.

Regina sighed. "I promise it's not morbid. It's a simple knock-knock joke. You just have to start it."

Emma smiled. "Okay fine. Knock Knock."

"Who's there?" Regina smirked.

"…"

"…"

"…"

"…"

Emma face-palmed herself and chuckled. "How did I fall for that?! Fine, THAT one was kinda funny. I'm gonna steal it."

Regina rolled her eyes and chuckled. "Have fun with it dear."

"Speaking of fun, did you enjoy yourself tonight?"

Regina looked up at the blonde and smiled. "Indeed I did. You most definitely surprised me tonight."

Emma smiled and mentally did a fist pump. _YES!_ "Well good. I was hoping you'd be comfortable enough to have fun. That was my goal. To make you feel comfortable."

Regina looked at the younger woman with a questioning glance. "Why exactly was that your goal?"

Emma took both of Regina's hands in hers and let out a deep breath. _Here we go._


	5. Understanding Puzzles

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The date finally comes to an end!

"Maj reminds me a lot of you Regina. You remind me a lot of Maj. The two of you are so alike it's crazy. See when I first ran across Maj, he was hurt, and weak, and sick. And even though it was obvious he needed help, he didn't want it from me. It took me talking to the horse for about two hours before he let me guide him to the stables. When I went to the stables the next few days after that, he started to trust me a little more. Granted he was still stubborn, but not so much that he didn't let me help him. One day I asked Joe why Maj was so reluctant for me to help him and be near him. Ya know what Joe said? Joe said, "Emma, this horse here has recently been through a lot. And sometimes we forget that animals are just like people. When you've been hurt by something or someone you don't fall back into the way of life so easily. It takes time for you to get back on your bike or to trust others again. Someone has to prove that they love you. That they want what's best for you. Then and only then, will you start to trust them and become comfortable enough to let your walls down. We let our walls down around certain people because we trust them to love us despite what they see." And so I finally understood. I had to prove myself to Maj so he could trust me. And day by day I loved him more and more. And now we have a bond that can't be broken."

Emma finally looked at Regina, only to see tears in the brunette's eyes.

"I know you can understand the comparison now, but I want to tell you anyway. Regina…the moment I met that horse and realized how stubborn it was, the first thought I had was, "Jesus, this horse is just like Regina."" Emma chuckled but kept going, looking Regina deep in her eyes. "But it wasn't until Joe said what he said, that I finally realized the comparison. Just like Maj, you've been hurt and you've been through a lot, so you're not easily trusting and your walls are always up. But also just like I wanted to care for Maj and love him, I want to care for and love you too. I want you to know that I care about you and have your best interest at heart. I want you to know and feel that you deserve to be loved. I want you to feel comfortable with me. I never want you to feel like you have to run away from me or hide how you feel or what you think from me. I want you to know that you can let your walls down with me, because at the end of the day, no matter what I see behind those walls, you'll always be Regina to me, and nothing and no one can change that. And to be honest the same thing goes for me. I've been hurt, and I've been through a lot and my walls literally stay up. But with you Regina, my walls are nonexistent. I love you as if I've never been hurt before. And even though that scares me, it also excites me. You excite me."

Regina pulled Emma by the waist and softly and passionately kissed her. However, this kiss was different. Less lust and want, and more passion and intimacy and _understanding,_ and both women felt the difference. A smile crossed their faces during the kiss and they pulled back, Emma wiping the tears from Regina's eyes.

Regina was just about to say something when the front door opened and their 13 year old son was standing there. Henry cleared his throat and made a spectacle of looking at his watch.

"It's 10:57pm. You have 3 minutes before curfew." And then he closed the door again causing both women to chuckle.

"I don't want this night to end." Regina whispered, so softly that Emma almost missed it.

"Neither do I. But is it completely ridiculous that I already can't wait to see you tomorrow? "

Regina laughed and intertwined her fingers with the blonde's. "If it's completely ridiculous, then I guess that makes both of us completely ridiculous dear."

Emma looked down at their hands and smiled. "Hey can I show you something?" Regina nodded. Emma held up her right hand and spread her fingers apart. "Now intertwine your fingers with mine." Regina hesitantly raised her left hand and intertwined her fingers with Emma's, wondering where this was going.

"See? The spaces between my fingers are right where yours fit perfectly. That means every time I look at my hand from now on, I'll think about you. I'll think about us."

Regina tilted her head back and let out a whine. "Emmmmmmmm! I swear if you keep being this romantic and sweet I'll never go in the house!" Regina pulled Emma by her blazer and buried her face in Emma's shoulder.

Emma giggled and played in Regina's hair. _So soft!_

"Did you just call me "Em"? Or did you just forget the "ma" part?" Emma inquired with a smirk.

Regina pulled back to look at Emma with a lifted eyebrow. "So you can call me "Gina" but I can't call you "Em"?"

Emma laughed. "Oh you can definitely call me "Em". Ginaaa." Emma tickled Regina's sides and the brunette doubled over in laugher, squirming to get free. However, their fun was cut short when Henry opened the door.

"Why do I feel like I just walked into some romantic comedy? Keep it down people are trying to sleep." Henry turned around and headed upstairs, leaving the door open.

"Well I should probably head home." Emma said.

Regina looked at their hands and smiled. "Indeed you should. Goodnight Sheriff, thank you for a wonderful evening." Regina leaned in for one last kiss and then stepped inside the house.

"Goodnight Madam Mayor." Emma smiled and turned to start walking down the path.

"Let me know when you make it home safely." Regina called out.

 _You are my home._ "I will." Emma said, before she turned the corner.

* * *

 **Emma:** I made it home :)

 **Regina:** Good to know dear. Did you drop Maj off at the stables?

 **Emma:** Yep I did. So…are you tired?

 **Regina:** I know I probably should be, but I seem to have a lot of energy.

 **Emma:** Can I ask you something?

 **Regina:** Anything.

 **Emma:** Do you feel like we're moving too fast? I mean, if I'm being honest I feel like we did everything backwards. Which I don't mind, it's just weird I guess.

…

 **Emma:** Regina?

Regina looked down at her phone and decided to call Emma. It rang once.

"Hello?" Emma answered hesitantly.

"No I don't think we're moving too fast. I do however, find it unorthodox. The way our relationship is. It's untraditional and messy, and I don't do messy. Ever. But when I'm around you, I feel put together. I think we're like a puzzle Emma. When Henry was younger he would always do puzzles, but he refused to look at the picture. He wanted to be surprised at what he saw at the end. It always took him longer than normal, but he would eventually solve it. And one day he said, "Mom, I know I do puzzles in a weird way, but I think it's cool and I like being different, and doing things in a different way. When something is different and special, you tend to hold on to it longer and cherish it more." He said that to me when he was 7. And I can't help but think that it applies to us. We are puzzle pieces Em. We didn't know what the picture looked like or what we wanted the picture to look like, so we just wandered around hoping maybe we'd fit with someone one day. We've both been paired with pieces that didn't fit, so we just stopped trying. It took us longer, but I think we fit Emma. You, Henry, and I. It's a small picture with only three pieces, but we fit. So no, I don't think we're moving too fast."

Regina let out a breath and waited for Emma to respond.

Silence.

"You…You always make me see things in a different light. I think you're my puzzle piece too Gina. You and the kid. I love you guys."

"We love you too."

They sat on the phone in a comfortable silence before Emma spoke up.

"So in this puzzle, am I a corner piece? Because ya know, that's everyone's favorite part of a puzzle." Emma joked.

Regina rolled her eyes. "If it helps you sleep at night, sure."

Emma fist pumped. "Yes! Ya know, I'm glad you said we're like puzzle pieces. I guess you can say we…found each other."

_Click._

Emma looked at her phone and started laughing. "I should have known she would hang up." She said to herself. Emma called her girlfriend back only to get no answer.

 **Emma:** Come on Gina! That was funny! Lol

No response.

 **Emma:** *sigh* I'm sorry I compared us to my parents Regina.

Regina smirked when she read the message.

 **Regina:** Would you like to join us for breakfast tomorrow at Granny's? 9am?

 **Emma:** :) Sounds like a plan. I'll meet you guys there. Or should I say…I'll find you guys there.

No response.

 **Emma:** That was the last one I swear.

No response.

 **Emma:** Am I still invited to breakfast?

 **Regina:** …Yes.


	6. Breakfast of Champions

When Emma walked into the diner, Regina and Henry were already there. _Of course._

"Good morning dear." Regina said as she looked over her menu and smiled.

Emma slid in the booth across from the two. "Ouch." Emma mumbled. "Good Morning beautiful! Morning kid!"

"Morning Ma! What's wrong? Why'd you say "ouch"?"

Regina and Henry looked at Emma with tilted heads and looks of concern. _God they look alike._ Emma picked up her menu and responded. "Fun fact: I woke up this morning in a super good mood. So good of a mood that I was singing and dancing in the shower after my run. Unfun fact: During the guitar solo of John Mayer's "Your Body Is a Wonderland" I slipped and fell in said shower." Emma winced as she recalled the fall. A couple of seconds passed and there was no response from the two sitting across from her. She looked up from behind her menu and narrowed her eyes.

Both brunettes were hiding behind their menus. If Emma had not seen Henry's shoulders shaking uncontrollably, she would have thought they were just looking at their menus.

"Are you two laughing at me?!" Emma exclaimed.

At that, Henry's laugh escaped and he put his menu down. "Sorry Ma, but that's hilarious! How many times did you slip trying to get up?" Henry asked.

Emma fixed him with a glare and then sat back in defeat. "Three." At that confession she heard a snicker come from the other brunette.

"Regina!" Emma looked at the menu blocking the older woman.

Regina put down her menu and schooled her facial expressions. However, Emma knew better and could tell she was biting back a smile.

"Yes dear?" Regina said innocently.

Emma narrowed her eyes. "You're supposed to be the adult, AND my girlfriend. You should be making sure I'm okay!"

Regina rolled her eyes. "Dear, of course I was going to ask you if you were okay. But you surely couldn't have expected me to not laugh at such a thing. However, now that we're on the topic, are you okay?" Regina asked seriously.

Before the blonde could answer, Ruby strutted up to the table.

"Ah, the Swan-Mills Family. My favorite family. What can I get for you?"

Henry piped up first. "Swan Mills… I like that. I'll have 2 pancakes, scrambled eggs, and bacon."

"I'll have a bowl of oatmeal, a pancake, and a banana." Regina said.

"Alright! Got both of the Mills, now for the Swan." Ruby smirked.

"Hmmm, give me an order of French toast with whipped cream on it, hash browns, 3 egg whites scrambled, bacon…like two servings of bacon, annnnnd grits." Emma continued looking at her menu, "I'm forgetting something but I can't remember what. Ruby can you read that back to me?" Emma said still concentrating on her menu, not noticing the 3 sets of wide eyes staring at her.

"French toast with whipped cream, hash browns, 3 egg whites scrambled, 2 servings of bacon, and grits." Ruby read off.

Emma snapped her fingers. "Ah! A side of strawberries please. Oh and pack up two bear claws for me." Emma closed her menu and handed it to Ruby.

"Oookay. It'll be right out." Ruby headed back to the kitchen, shaking her head.

Emma turned to see two sets of eyes basically out of their sockets. "What? I'm hungry."

"Emma…no one is that hungry." Regina said, still shocked that someone could order that much food.

Henry spoke up next. "Yeah Ma. I wasn't even that hungry when I got over the flu and could eat regular food again."

Emma rolled her eyes. "Look, I don't need the judgment from you two. I'm super nervous about telling my parents today, plus I had an hour long workout this morning so I think I deserve it. Plus I'm a long ways away from getting a gut. I'll be fine."

Regina took Emma's hands in hers. "It'll be fine dear. I'm sure. You're their daughter, they'll love you regardless." Regina offered with a smile.

"Yeah, as long as you're with me, everything will be more than fine." Emma returned a smile to her girlfriend.

Henry faked a gagging noise. "Alright alright, enough of the love fest. So what are we gonna do today? I mean after you guys tell Gran and Gramps the news."

"Hmmm, well what do you two want to do?" Emma asked.

"How about we have a movie day. Movies inside with popcorn, and we can bake cookies." Regina suggested.

Emma and Henry grinned widely. "Sounds good Mom." Henry said.

"Can we build a fort?!" Emma asked looking like a hopeful child.

Regina rolled eyes at her girlfriend's childishness and Henry snickered.

"Honestly Emma, you're a child. But sure, that sounds fun."

Ruby arrived minutes later with their food.

"Okay! Two pancakes, eggs, and bacon for little Mills, pancake, oatmeal, and banana for lady Mills, and everything on the menu for the Swan. Anything else I can get you?"

Everyone shook their heads and thanked Ruby. The table was pretty quiet for a while with everyone eating. That is until Ruby came back to the table doubled over in laughter.

"Emma! What did you do to Snow? She just called me in hysterics screaming, "My arms don't work! My arms don't work!" What did you do?!"

Emma grinned and Regina laughed, while henry sat utterly confused.

"Oh my gosh! She's still crying and screaming?! When I left David was calming her down. Look!" Emma pulled out her phone and played the video.

_(Mary Margaret is sitting at the table.)_

" _What's happening Emma?! I can't pick up anything! I can't even brush my teeth! How are you dressed? I couldn't even put on my slippers! David!"_

_David comes into frame with two cups of coffee and sits one in front of his wife. "Here honey, it's okay. Just drink some coffee." David says._

_The short haired brunette attempts to pick up the coffee mug and fails. "David why would you sit it down?! I just said I can't pick anything up! You think this is a game?! Do you hate me?! What's happening?!"_

The video shuts off as you hear Emma giggling in the background.

Everyone at the table is laughing including Ruby. "Dude, that's hilarious! But did you have to make it to where she couldn't pick up Neal?!" Ruby asks between laughs.

Emma's eyes widen in confusion. "Wait, what? I didn't-" Emma stops to look at her girlfriend across the table, who is sipping her coffee innocently. "Really Regina? You put Neal in the prank?" Emma deadpanned.

Regina shrugged. "Once again, the rules weren't specific. She's not dead or in the hospital so technically I did nothing wrong. I just believe in being thorough." The brunette giggled behind her cup.

Ruby shook her head and smiled at the Mayor. "Classic Regina, man, classic. Well I advise you to fix it before Snow loses her mind altogether." Ruby said walking away chuckling.

Henry and Emma look at the older brunette expectedly. Regina rolled her eyes. "Very well, I'll change it back." Regina waved her hand and went back to her coffee. "There, it's fixed. Happy now?" Her son and girlfriend nodded. "You two are no fun." Regina mumbled with a pout.

For the rest of breakfast, the three talked until they were finished eating. Of course, they were actually waiting on Emma to finish.

"Ma, I can't believe you actually ate all of that!" Henry said as they walked out of the diner.

Regina spoke up before Emma could respond. "Well rest assured that was her last time eating like that. And hand over the bear claws, honestly Emma you're eating yourself into an early grave." Regina reached for the bag of bear claws only for Emma to hold them above her head.

"What?! Regina that was the breakfast of champions! I have a high metabolism so I HAVE to eat a lot. And there's no way you're taking my bear claws away without a fight." Emma said.

Both Henry and Emma watched Regina fix the blonde with a glare and a challenge. "Miss Swan…"

"Uh, Ma, maybe you should just hand them over. She went all the way back to "Miss Swan."" Henry warned.

"Alright Regina, I'll give you the bear claws, if you let me drive the Mercedes the rest of the month." Emma suggested with a smirk.

"Absolutely not." Regina said sternly.

"Then no deal." Emma shrugged.

Henry rolled his eyes. ''And I thought I was the kid. Ma just hand over the bear claws."

"Why should I have to? She should let me eat them! I paid for them." Emma said.

Henry turned to his other mother. "Mom, if you let Emma keep the bear claws, she'll do the dishes for the next week."

"Works for me. Let's go." Regina went around the car with a smile and got in the driver's seat.

"Kid!" Emma shoved her son on the shoulder. "I don't want to do dishes. I hate doing dishes! I'll just give her the bear claws."

Henry laughed and shook his head. "Oh, Ma. She hates doing dishes even more than you do. She's not gonna let you out of this one. Sorry, I just wanted to hurry up and get to Gran and Gramps' place. You should have just given her the bear claws." Henry turned and got in the car, followed by a sulking Emma.


	7. Decisions in a Ridiculous Town

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time to have a talk with the parents

Emma, Regina, and Henry walked into the Charming's apartment to complete silence.

"Mom? Dad? You guys here?" Emma turned to the two brunettes and muttered, "It still feels weird to call them that sometimes." Both brunettes nodded in understanding.

David entered into the kitchen followed by Snow. "Oh, hey Emma. Oh and Regina and Henry! What brings you two by?"

Snow walked to embrace Emma into a hug. "Oh Emma! It's been such a hard morning. I couldn't pick up Neal! But thankfully it's over now. I thought it was a side-effect of the shrinking. I called Whale but he insists that I'm not shrinking. But look at these pants Emma! It looks like I'm wearing David's pants! But I'm still the same height so I don't understand what's happening! And then I-"

"Woah! Calm down, take a deep breath. I barely heard anything you said. You were talking so fast. I'm sure everything's okay with you." Emma suppressed a smile, knowing she was the cause of these hysterics. "Anywho, Regina and Henry are here because we have something to tell you."

The five of them sat down at the table before Emma started.

"Now, please don't overreact." Emma looked pointedly at her mother, and took a deep breath. "Yesterday, Regina and I found out that we had certain feelings towards each other. We're in love with each other and last night we went on a date, and Regina looked beautiful and it was beyond great and she makes me super happy and I know it seems super backwards because it is, but that's how it happened, so now we're together."

Silence.

Emma, Regina, and Henry waited for a response. Emma and Henry slowly panicking and Regina waiting to celebrate the explosion that was about to happen.

"Did you happen to tell Ruby about you two?" Snow asked skeptically. Emma nodded. Snow hit David's arm. "That's why Ruby changed her bet yesterday! She already knew! I'm not paying her a dime."

David nodded in agreement. "Yeah but at least we were closer this month. Only a week off."

Regina spoke up. "What exactly is going on?"

"There's been a betting pool on when you and Ma would get together. It's been going on for years." Henry stated.

Regina and Emma's eyes widened. "So you're not surprised by this?" Emma asked.

Her parents rolled their eyes. "Honestly sweetheart, this is way overdue. I'm surprised it took you two this long with all the longing eye glances and junk. Really Emma, I don't even look at David like that." Snow stated as if it was obvious.

More silence.

"So when's the wedding? Emma did you propose? Are you going to move in with them? There are boxes at the station if you-"

"Woah! Okay David chill. We JUST got together; we're not getting married yet." Emma said.

"But Ma, you are gonna move in right?" Henry asked, with a hopefully look in his eyes.

All eyes in the room were on Emma, including her girlfriend's. "Regina! Why are you looking at me?!...Wait...do you want me to move in?"

Regina raised her eyebrows. "Do you want to?"

Once again all eyes were on the blonde.

"I…wh…how…I mean yeah, of course I do. I wanna spend the rest of my life with you Gina, but don't you think all think that's moving way too fast?"

Regina smirked at Emma, "Of course, I think that's moving too fast. I just wanted to see what you wanted. I think we should take our time."

Emma smiled and rolled her eyes at Regina as she pulled her in for a kiss. "So what if I had just said yes? You would have let me move in?"

Regina smiled. "I knew you wouldn't have "just said yes", but if you would have I would have been elated. I want to spend my life with you too. I don't care how we do it. As long as we're together."

The two women leaned in to kiss again, both of them smiling into the kiss.

"Are you kidding me?!" Henry exclaimed.

Both women turned to see David, Snow, and Henry looking at them with annoyed, irritated, and disgusted expressions.

"What?" They both asked.

Snow stood up and starting pacing. "What?! Are you two serious right now? "Oh I love you. I wanna spend the rest of my life with you" "Oh I love you too, anywhere you are, is where I wanna be." Muah muah muah, kissy-face kissy-face! Those were basically wedding vows!" Snow mocked.

"Yeah! If a priest would have been here you two would be married! This is ridiculous. "Move slow" As if." David scoffed.

"True that! Look Moms, we've been waiting years for this. And this taking it slow thing sucks. You've been taking it slow for years! Put it in gear; put your foot on the gas, and GO!"

Henry, David, and Snow were now all standing and looking at the two women.

Emma stared at the three. "Look guys, we just-"

Mary Margaret raised her hand, cutting Emma off. "We don't want to hear it. Do what you have to do. Just speed this crap up. Let's go you guys. I can't take this right now. I want a milkshake." She went to pick up Neal, and David and Henry hummed in agreement as the four of them exited the apartment and headed to Granny's.

Emma turned to Regina slowly. "What's wrong with our family?"

Regina shook her head and smiled. "Too much. But when we do decide to live together, I don't think we should tell them ahead of time. I'm guessing there's probably a betting pool on that as well."

Emma smirked and shook her head. "I can't believe this town. Betting on our relationship? Are people in this town THAT nosey?!"

Both looked at each other and nodded.

"Yeah."

"Most definitely."

There was a moment of silence. A pregnant silence. Both women lost in their own thoughts.

_Look at her…She's so beautiful. I would love to wake up to her every morning. But we JUST got together. It's too soon to move in…isn't it? I just don't wanna be apart from her unless I absolutely have to…ugh…Swan get it together! Just ask her!_

_Just ask her to move in. I'm sure she'd say yes…No, no, no we just talked moving too fast. But I just want to be with her at all moments of the day. Look at her idiotic, gorgeous face. And that blonde hair! I would love to bury my face in that every morning and night. How is her hair even that blonde? She better not be a bottle blonde._ Regina sighed _. I don't want to wait months before she moves in!_

"So you wanna just do it?"

"Move in."

They spoke simultaneously.

"Wait what?"

"Huh?"

Emma looked at Regina. "I was asking if you wanna go for it. Ya know…living together." Emma asked shyly.

Regina smiled. "Well I was saying that you should move in. I know we literally just said that it would be moving too fast but I just feel like…" Regina trailed off. "I just have this feeling."

Emma tilted her head as she looked at Regina.

"You feel it too?"

Regina looked at Emma with a questioning expression.

"I have this feeling. It could only be explained as a pull towards you. And it's so strong it almost kind makes me feel sick to even think about being away from you." Emma explained.

Regina nodded in agreement. "Oh well yes. I do feel it too. Ever since that kiss last night, I've felt it intensely. Being with you makes it go away, but even thinking about being away from you makes the pull come back tenfold. I've never felt like this before."

Emma pulled Regina to sit on her lap. "Yeah me either. Maybe it's our magic or something." Emma sat up and looked around the room. "Do you hear that Regina?"

They were quiet for a moment. "No, dear I don't hear anything. What did you hear?"

Emma shook her head. "Nevermind. So, what now?"

Regina got up, pulling her girlfriend with her. "Well now we spend the day packing up your stuff, and then you move in." She pulled the blonde in for a kiss, but soon pulled back after hearing shouts of what sounded like…celebration? Talking? Mumbling?

"Okay I heard _that_. What is that?"

Both women looked around the room looking for the source of the noise. Both sets of eyes landed on the baby monitor. They both moved closer to it in order to get a better listen. They soon heard a familiar voice.

" _It's about time, am I right sister?!" -Leroy_

" _Honestly, those two take longer than anyone to do anything. I'm surprised it didn't take them another 5 years. It was a genius idea bringing this monitor so we could listen in Snow!" -Granny_

" _I wonder how long it'll take them to Marvin Gaye and get it on…" -Ruby_

" _Woah! Okay! Those are my moms you're talking about. I don't wanna think about them like that." -Henry_

_*squeals* "I'm going to have magic grandbabies!" –Mary Margaret_

" _Yeah yeah yeah, true love sex and babies, we get it. Now everyone cough up the cash. I was the only one that took the bet that they'd decide to move in together the day after they got together. And you all thought I was crazy. Cough it up."-Zelena_

_Everyone was grumbling and complaining._

" _Thank you very much darlings. It truly is a pleasure doing business with you all." –Zelena_

" _Blah blah, so what's the next bet? I say we lay out our guesses of when they'll get engaged." –Ruby_

" _Sounds good, but let's make that bet a 2 part. When they'll get engaged and which one of them will pop the question." –Henry_

" _Ohhh yeah, that's a good one Hen."-David_

" _Alright, let's start off by placing bets on who'll pop the question first, and then we'll move on to when." –Granny_

They were all so busy chattering and placing bets that they didn't notice the two women of topic appear in a poof of purple smoke. They both took in the seen in front of them. Among the people that they already knew were there, stood Maleficent, Belle, Gold, the Blue fairy, and a few of other Storybrooke citizens.

"Ya know if you're gonna eavesdrop on two people using a baby monitor, you should probably set it going one way." Emma said holding up the baby monitor, while Regina fixed everyone with a glare.

Everyone turned to look at the women that appeared out of nowhere. Their faces turned different shades of red and the group turned to look at Snow.

"I just grabbed it and left! I didn't have time to check for technical difficulties! You all should be thanking me. Without me, we wouldn't have even known what was going on!" Snow said in defense.

The rest of the group agreed with nodded heads and mumbles.

"Well, since you people have enough energy to gossip and bet on our personal lives, then I'm sure you have enough energy to help us pack and move Emma's things today." Regina stated.

Everyone groaned and sighed, Leroy being the loudest. "Fine sister, but only because I'm ready for you two to tie the knot already. I'll round up the rest of the dwarves."

Emma clapped her hands together and smiled. "Great! Let's get going!"

Before anyone could move, Archie ran in the diner, followed by Tinkerbell, Mulan, Lily, August, and Whale. None of them noticing the two women standing there.

"Hey, we got Ruby's text about the new betting pool. I put $50 on Emma asking first!" Archie said, slightly out of breath.

"No way! Regina totally has more balls than Emma! She'll definitely be the one to ask!" Whale countered.

Both Emma and Regina cleared their throats, making the new arrivals aware of their presence.

"I swear this town is ridiculous." Emma said under her breath.

Regina smirked and put her head on Emma's shoulder. "Agreed dear. Agreed."


	8. What Are the Chances?

_**Four Months Later** _

"Emma!"

Henry and Emma paused the video game they were playing, looking at each other in fear.

"Do you think she found it?" Emma asked her son.

Henry gulped and nodded slowly. "By the sound of her voice, I'd say she did."

Suddenly they heard footsteps coming up the stairs and they both leapt up.

"Hide! Freaking hide kid! Turn off the TV and hide!" Emma whispered, as she crawled under her son's bed in a hurry.

"Where am I supposed to hide?! God I knew we shouldn't have done this!" Henry said as he stepped in his closet to hide.

A few seconds later, Regina walked into her son's room to find it empty. She would have bought it if she didn't see the mess of blonde curls coming from under the bed. She could only guess that Henry was under there with her or in the closet. _She's a grown adult and she can't even hide properly._ Regina thought and shook her head.

"Emma Swan and Henry Mills! You have exactly 5 seconds to come out of hiding and give me an explanation."

Henry immediately opened the closet door and stepped out looking as guilty as ever. His blonde mother however, did not move.

"It wasn't my idea Mom. I told her it was a bad idea but she insisted," Henry said, defending himself. "And Ma, she can see your hair. She knows you're under the bed."

Emma let out a loud sigh and crawled from her hiding spot and stood next to Henry. "I swear kid, if I ever commit another crime, I'm not doing it with you. You'd dime me out 10 seconds into interrogation." Emma said with a huff.

"Yes well judging by your hiding skills, you'd get caught anyway. Now EXPLAIN!" Regina demanded.

"Awh Gina come on! He's cute." Emma bent down to pick up the new puppy that had followed Regina upstairs. "Wook at him! Him wove you Gina!" Emma held the puppy up to Regina's face and watched in amusement as it licked the brunette's cheek.

 _Don't give in! Don't give in!_ "Em…we can't have a dog. Who's going to take care of it when no one is home?"

Emma put the puppy down and looked at her girlfriend. "Babe, I already took care of that. Archie is willing to watch him. Annd I can take him to work with me! He can be a police dog! I think we'd look good together."

Regina looked down at the puppy that was nuzzled against her foot and then looked back up at Emma, repeating the action several times. _God they do look alike. How have I never noticed that my girlfriend looks like a cute little golden retriever? Is it weird that I'm turned on by this? Ugh fine._

"Fine. He is kind of cute." Regina bent down to pick up the golden puppy. "What's his name?"

"Airbud."

"Chauncey."

Both Emma and Henry looked at each other in disgust.

"Airbud? Ma, no. That's not original." Henry said.

Emma scoffed. "And Chauncey is better? Kid, this dog isn't some prep school kid with a stick up his butt. And he's also not a butler either."

Regina rolled her eyes. "I'll name him. I don't want my dog going around with a ridiculous name."

Henry and Emma watched as Regina exited the room with the unnamed puppy asleep in her arms.

"Her dog?" Henry said when his mother was out of earshot.

"That dog better not get more attention than me. I'm still the cutest in the house." Emma said with a fixed glare at the door her girlfriend had left through, not noticing her son's eye roll.

* * *

Emma woke up the next morning to feeling of something licking her cheek. _Mmmm kinky._ "Regina, babe, I'm completely in love with you and not opposed to this at all, but babe, your morning breath is not okay this morning."

When no snarky reply or pillow to the head followed her comment, she opened her eyes. Standing over her was a puppy that seemed to have a collar now. _So he has a collar but no name. Do we do everything backwards in this family?_ Before she could make a comment, she caught a glimpse of something else on the collar.

"No, no, no, no…" she mumbled to herself. She sat up to get a closer look to make sure her eyes weren't deceiving her. But surely enough, on the collar was an extremely sparkly, engagement ring. "Oh my gosh. Oh. My. Gosh. No, no, no, no. I swear…" Emma continued mumbling to herself as she wiped the tears from her eyes, and headed downstairs with Mr. No Name.

Emma walked into the kitchen to see Henry and Regina waiting expectantly.

"Regina…"

Regina sauntered towards the blonde with a nervous smile and took a deep breath. "I bought the dog a collar this morning."

 _Errr…that's an interesting way to start._ Emma thought.

"That was a weird way to start Mom." Henry said with a chuckle, but quickly apologized when he earned a glare from his brunette mother.

Regina continued, "And I was going to buy him a lot of toys and other necessities, but I didn't. And I came up with a list of appropriate names for him but I didn't name him. I could have made these decisions and done everything by myself but I didn't want to. I wanted you there with me. I wanted to make these decisions, even though they are minor, with you. And that is just…peculiar for me, because there was a time when I would prefer to make decisions on my own. But now? Now I want to make every single decision with you. But there's one decision I've already made that you have to make too. I've decided that I want to spend the rest of my life making decisions with you. I want to decide wedding plans, and baby names, and paint colors, and anniversary plans, and vacation spots, with you. I want to decide what we eat for dinner, with you. I want to decide whether we get a trampoline or not, with you. I want to decide when you'll throw that hideous red jacket away, with you. Darling, I want to make every decision with you. And I was going to plan something really big, because I know that this is a really big deal, but I wanted you to know that this is what I want. I want to wake up next to you. I want you to wake up late every Saturday morning in a t-shirt and shorts, and come downstairs to join your family. In my heart, my mind, my soul, and everything within me, I know I will forever choose you. Not just because you're my true love, but because I love you. Now you have to decide if you want to choose me forever and if you want to take a chance on me. And Em, I know we've only just started this journey, so if you're not ready I-"

Regina's speech was unexpectedly cut short with a passionate kiss from the blonde woman in front of her.

"YES! Yes yes yes yes. I decided you were the one a long time ago Regina. Baby, when I say you are my world, I don't say it to sound romantic. I say it because you ARE my world. My world comes together with you in it. I don't care how long we've been together, any time with you will feel right. Sweetheart, I would follow you to hell and back if it meant I still got to be with you and see your smile and hear that gorgeous laugh and listen to you insult my red jacket even though we both know you love it. True love or not, I would choose you every time. Gina, baby if I got the chance to make decisions with you for the rest of my, I'd never stop smiling. Regina, you're the reason I constantly smile now, and now you're asking me to live the rest of my life with a smile on my face? Yes, Regina. Absolutely yes."

Both women pulled each other in for a long passionate, hungry kiss. Both with tears in their eyes and fireworks in their stomachs. They soon pulled away when their son came in for a group hug.

"Well I guess "Operation Best Pup" didn't completely backfire did it Ma?" Henry said with a smirk.

"Operation Best Pup?" Regina raised an eyebrow at her son.

"Yeah it's an operation we were working on. Ma named it, obviously." Henry said with an eye roll at the mention of his Mother's bad naming skills.

"And what exactly did this operation consist of?" She asked, looking at the two in front of her.

Emma rubbed the back of her neck and chuckled, "Well, um, I was gonna propose to you almost the exact same way. That's kinda why I got the dog in the first place. I set up a special dinner for tonight and everything. I even got Mr. NoName here a little tux outfit, and he was gonna have the ring around his little bowtie. It was gonna be killer."

Regina stood with her mouth open. "How long had you been planning it?"

Emma laughed, "If I'm being honest, the last two days. I picked up the ring Thursday and then yesterday when I saw Mr. NoName I just knew I had to get him and propose that way. How long have you been planning to propose to me?" Emma asked with a hint of amusement.

Regina smirked, "I got the ring Thursday too. What time did you purchase yours?"

Emma smirked back at the brunette. "6:13pm. I went out of town to get it. That's why I was late for dinner. You?"

"I bought it at 12:04pm. I had to go out of town as well, which is why I couldn't do lunch that day." Regina replied with a smile.

"Well Madam Mayor, it seems like we are more alike than we thought." Emma leaned in to give her fiancée another kiss that was cut short by her son.

"So are you two gonna actually put the rings on or just talk about them?" He said with a smirk.

Emma poofed the jewelry box, with Regina's ring in it, into her hand while Regina removed the other ring from the dog's collar. "Yeah, let's do this."

The blonde opened the box and heard a gasp from her fiancée. She slid the ring on Regina's finger and watched as Regina examined the ring. Regina recognized the ring immediately. It had a sort of elegance that would only fit a true queen, and Regina knew for a fact that this ring was 10.07 carats with a pair of step-cut trapezoid diamonds perfected by a platinum design.

"Emma…where did you get this ring?"

Emma smiled and shook her head, "No questions until you give me my ring."

Regina smiled and slid the ring on Emma's finger. Emma was the next to let out a gasp. She hadn't really gotten a chance to see it earlier but now looking at up close, she came to a realization.

"Regina…this is the exact same ring I just put on your finger." She looked up at her fiancée. "Regina, this ring was almost $300,000. You bought me a $300,000 ring?! Are you insane?!"

Regina raised her eyebrow and lifted her left hand. "Well I could ask you the same question Miss Swan. Where did you even get the money for such a ring?"

Emma let out a nervous laugh. "Well, you pay me pretty well Madam Mayor, so I've been adding money to my savings account for the past few years. And I also have a friend in Boston that just won the lottery and he owed me quite a few favors. Let's just say we're even now."

Regina shook her head with a smile and rolled her eyes. "Of course. Well at least we both have good taste."

Emma smiled wildly. "We really do have good taste. I mean look at us. We're both smoking hot and now we both have smoking hot rings."

"Don't forget your smoking hot son! I'm carrying the hotness and adorableness in the family. Can't beat that combo." Henry said as he put down his camera.

Emma scoffed and Regina headed to the refrigerator to find something to cook for breakfast. "Please kid. I'm definitely the most adorable in the family. Neal is second because he still poops on himself."

Regina and Henry both rolled their eyes but before either of them could respond they heard barking and turned to see the unnamed dog wagging his tail.

"Crap. I think I'm second for most adorable now…We should probably name him." Emma said with a sigh.

"Well we can figure out something while I cook breakfast." Regina said.

Emma grabbed a notepad and a pen, while Henry picked up the dog and sat him in his lap.

"Okay, what about Emmett?"

Regina and Henry both stared at the blonde. "That's pretty egotistical, Ma."

Emma's mouth dropped open as she feigned innocence. "What? How? I mean, Emmett is just a nice name. It's not my fault it's close to my name."

Regina crossed her arms and looked at her fiancée. "Okay then, why can't we just name him Reginald?"

Emma's face scrunched up and she shook her head with disapproval. "Wow Regina, it's not all about you. Narcissistic much?"

Regina and Henry both laughed at the blonde. "Honestly dear, you're preposterous."

The three sat in silence for a while deep in thought.

"Hey, what about Chance?" Henry suggested.

"Chance? Why Chance?" Regina questioned.

"Yeah kid. That's pretty random."

"Well, I figured it fits the occasion. I mean, you both took a chance on each other. I mean how crazy is it that you both basically planned the same proposal, with the same rings? I mean, what are the chances? Haha, get it? Chances? What are the chances?...Honestly, I think it's pretty perfect."

There was a moment of silence. Both women taking in the reasoning of the name.

"Lame pun, but I like it kid. Too smart for your own good if you ask me."

Regina chuckled and kissed Henry on the forehead. "That's my prince. I love it."

Henry looked down at the dog. "How about that Chance? Do you like that name?"

Chance jumped up with a bark and licked Henry's face. "Ugh, I'm gonna take that as a yes." Henry said, earning a laugh from both his mothers.

* * *

Emma has been leaning against the doorway of her and Regina's bedroom door for the past 3 minutes, looking at her fiancée. Regina is sitting in the bed reading a Harry Potter book, because apparently she's a Potterhead, and oblivious to Emma's presence. Over the past few months Emma has learned so much about Regina; specifically that Regina is a complete and absolute nerdy geek. Emma came home one night to see Regina and Belle in some Harry Potter gear, sitting in front of the TV. Turns out there had been a Harry Potter marathon on and they had skipped work to watch and discuss the movies. She also learned that if cuddling was a sport, Regina would come in first place every single time. She's learned to never touch Regina's pop tarts, and to never interrupt Regina's yoga time. They're continually learning things about each other and every new thing is like opening up a present on Christmas morning. _I can't believe I get to spend the rest of my life with this geek. She looks so good in those glasses. I am one lucky mofo. I'm lucky she took a chance on me._

Emma's thoughts are interrupted by an outburst of Regina laughing at something in the book, as if she hadn't read it before. Emma rolls her eyes and smiles, "You are such a geek, but I'm glad you took a chance on me." Emma states, making Regina look up suddenly.

Regina smiles and places her book on her nightstand. "I'd like to say we took a chance on each other, and I'm not a geek, I'm just interested in certain things. Don't act like you don't go completely geek mode when it comes to comic books and those movies."

 _Geek mode? What a nerd_. Emma smiles goofily and enters the room to sit on the bed in front of Regina. She intertwines their fingers together and looks at them for quite a while. Her smile has faded and she seems to be in deep thought, which Regina notices.

"What's wrong dear?"

Emma looks up and makes eye contact with the brunette. "You mentioned baby names. You want to decide baby names with me. Regina…do you really want to have kids with me?" she asks hesitantly.

Regina tilts her head at the question because of course she wants to have kids with Emma. Why wouldn't she?

"Of course I do. Why wouldn't I? I mean if you don't want to have any more kids then that's fine, but-"

"No, babe I do want more kids. I just never thought you would want more. I mean, I'd love to have a few more munchkins running around the house, I just…You raised Henry sooo well, and I…I mean I've never actually raised a kid so I'm not sure I'd be too good at it."

Regina smiled and pulled Emma towards her. Emma laid her head on Regina's chest as Regina stroked her hair. "Em, I'm about to be brutally honest with you. Okay?" Emma nodded and she continued. "Firstly, I don't ever want to hear you refer to our children as munchkins again. I've seen munchkins and I wasn't impressed whatsoever. Secondly, I don't ever want to hear you doubt your parenting abilities, or any other abilities for that matter. Look at Henry. He's a great kid, but he's learned so much from you since you've come into his life and been raising him too. Yes, he would have been fine with just me, but he's exceptionally better with the both of us. And Yes, I gave you the memories when the two of you moved to New York, but it was still you raising him Emma. You're a great parent. Your methods are quite unconventional and they make me question a lot of things, but in the end it always works out. There are things that I don't really know either. I know I put on a façade as if I know what I'm doing and usually I do, but when it comes to raising kids, no one really knows what they're doing. A good parent just tries their best. Every parent has different parenting methods, but I think our parenting methods are better together. Sometimes I bring the fire and you bring the extinguisher, and other times you bring the fire and I bring the water hose. There are times when I'm too hard on him and you're not hard enough. But I think we balance it well, and I'm willing to bet everything that we'll balance it well with the others."

Emma jumps up out of the bed and looks at Regina with wide eyes and the goofiest grin on her face. "We're like the perfect alley-oop. I throw it up and you slam it down, and sometimes you throw it up and I slam it down. We're like Shaq and Kobe. Lebron and Wade. Nash and Nowitzki. Magic and Abdul-Jabbar. Jordan and Pippen! We're like the Avengers, Gina! I call dibs on Iron Man! You can be Black Widow for obvious reasons. Oh my gosh! Gina! If we have enough kids, we could assemble an actual Avengers squad! You're totally right, we can do this."

Regina stares at Emma for a long while and finally raises her eyebrow. "And you have the audacity to call me a geek? Dear Lord, Emma. And how many kids are you trying to have exactly? And you chose for me to be Black Widow because of my intellect and advanced skill-level, and not just because I would look good in the outfit, correct?"

Emma puts her hands on her hips, tilts her head thoughtfully, and then shrugs. "First of all, of course that's why you're the Black Widow babe! You'll keep the rest of us in line. The outfit is just a huge bonus. Second of all, I only thought about having two or three more kids, but now? I want a squad, so when it's time for breakfast or a family meeting, I can say, "Avengers Assemble!" or something like that, and then they'll come down and strike a pose!"

Before Regina can reply to Emma's ridiculousness, Henry basically runs into the room with wide eyes. "Did someone say "Avengers Assemble"? Are we watching one of the movies?"

Regina rolled her eyes. "No Henry. We were discussing having children before your mother went off on a ridiculous tangent about basketball and Avengers."

"More kids?! Forget the movies! We could have an actual Avengers squad!" Henry practically yelled.

"That's what I said! It would be so legit!" Emma said giving her son a high five.

"I call Iron Man. Mom you're Black Widow for obvious reasons, and Ma you're Captain America for even more obvious reasons." Henry said.

"Hey! Why would I be Captain America? I already called Iron Man!" Emma said, sounding deeply insulted.

"Oh please Emma. You're a do-gooder and you can't deny that. Sure you have some Iron Man qualities but you're definitely Captain America. The only other person I would put you as is Deadpool, and that's only because of your inappropriateness. And why is it so obvious that I'm Black Widow? Maybe I want to be the Hulk." Regina said with a huff.

Emma and Henry both stared at Regina for a while before bursting out in laughter.

"Yeah, okay babe. Don't try to deny that you're basically Black Widow without the outfit."

"Yeah Mom, you keep us in line but you're fierce while doing it. You could also kill a man with no effort so…it's pretty self-explanatory."

Regina smirked at the description. "I guess that's pretty accurate."

Emma sighed, looking defeated. "Yeah, I guess I am Cap. And by the way, Deadpool is freaking hilarious! I changed my mind. I'm Deadpool. Actually I could be a mix between the two…Captain Pool…no, that's not good. Um, what about…Dead America…wait no, that sounded better in my head. Whatever, I'll think about it later."

Both the brunettes were looking at Emma as if they were trying to figure out a hard math equation.

Henry finally shook his head, and asked, "So kids huh? Are you all going to adopt or get a sperm donor?"

Regina was about to answer her inquisitive son, but she was too distracted and amused by the look of absolute shock on Emma's face.

"Henry what the actual freak kid?! We can't talk to you about that! Do you even know what sperm is?! Aren't you like ten?! What have you been reading?! Have you been looking at pictures and videos of naked people doing it? Because that's called porn young man and I can look up your internet history!" Emma said with her arms crossed and fixing Henry with a glare.

Both Henry and Regina looked at each other in disbelief and amusement.

"Em, remember when I said that sometimes you bring the fire? Well this is me putting the fire out. Chill Emma. Henry is fifteen. If he didn't know what sperm was then we would have a reason to worry. And to answer your question Henry, we can actually have kids like any other couple, True Love and all." Regina finally said.

Henry tilted his head and thought for a second. "That's super cool and I'm probably going to have questions about that later. Anyway, what are we gonna eat for dinner?"

As if on cue, Regina's stomach growled. "I'm not sure. It's only 6:03pm, maybe we could order pizza and watch a mov-"

"Hold up, hold up, HOLD UP!" Emma said abruptly with both hands raised, causing both brunettes to look at her. "You're telling me that we can have kiddos like…through normal sex? Like just fingers and tongue? Or will it work with a strap-on too? Because I saw this new one online and I-" She was cut off by the yelling of both her son and fiancée.

"EMMA!" Regina yelled.

"La la la la la la la la AHHHHHH! I don't wanna know! I. Don't. Want. To. Know! I'm going to go order pizza!" Henry yelled running out of the room with his ears covered.

Regina stood, glaring daggers into her fiancée.

Emma's eyes widened and her shoulders lifted in a high shrug. "Whaaat?! One minute he's old enough to know about sperm but the next minute he's not old enough to know about a strap-on? He can know about the real one but not the fake one? That's discrimination!"

Regina stared at Emma for a full minute before picking up her cell phone. "You know, I would make you sleep on the couch for this whole ordeal, but then I'd just be punishing myself, so instead I'm just going to tell your mother and I'm going to make you sit through a long conversation about sex with her." She said with a smirk, as she headed out the bedroom door and down the stairs.

 _Is she seriously gonna tattle on me? Ha! Yeah right._ Emma thought, causing Her to laugh out loud. Her laughter was cut short, her eyes widened comically, and her head turned slowly as she heard Regina downstairs talking on the phone. "Gina! NO! Please, I'll sleep on the couch! HANG UP!" She yelled as she ran to make her way downstairs.


	9. Plums and Oranges

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Your typical family dinner

"Your mother invited us over for dinner." Regina said casually as Emma rushed into the kitchen.

"Regina, please tell me that you didn't tell my mom what I said." Emma begged.

Regina waved her off and smirked. "Oh dear, do you really think I'd run and tell your mother every little thing you do?"

Emma glared at her fiancée and crossed her arms.

"Normally? No. But having my parents talk to me about sex? It's too evil of an act for you to pass up."

Regina smiled. "Touché dear. I guess we'll see, but do you really think I'd do such an evil act to the love of my life?" Regina purred, with all the seduction of a queen.

Emma faltered for a bit but she caught herself before Regina could catch it. The blonde sauntered up to the brunette and pulled her in by the waist, their foreheads touching.

"Maybe, maybe not. But if I go down, I'm taking you with me." Emma said.

"Well if you go down, I'll definitely enjoy it." Regina said with a wink.

Emma smirked and leaned forward to nibble on Regina's ear. "Madam Mayor, you have no idea what I'm capable of." She whispered her voice full of sex.

Emma's voice made Regina weak in the knees. She felt a familiar heat in her stomach and dampness between her legs. "Well Sheriff, how about you give me a very thorough example of what you're capable of." Regina said huskily.

Emma lifted the brunette onto the counter, while kissing her neck gently. "As you wish, my Queen." Emma nibbled Regina's neck causing the brunette to moan softly.

"What. The. Hell. Did you guys honestly forget I was sitting here?!"

Hearing her son's voice, Regina quickly pushed Emma away and jumped off the counter, fixing her hair and clothes.

"Henry! When did you get there?" Regina asked slightly out of breath.

"I've been here! I literally just watched you call Grandma. We were just talking about dinner! Were you guys seriously about to have sex?! On the counter?!" Henry responded in disgust and shock.

"Yes." Emma responded, extremely irritated.

"No!" Regina retorted, sending Emma a glare.

"Cockblock." Emma mumbled.

"EMMA!" Regina slapped her fiancée's arm.

"Ma, it was more of a vag-block if you wanna be accurate about it." Henry countered with a smirk.

"Henry!" Regina's head snapped in the direction of her son.

Henry rolled his eyes, "I'm just saying, keep it in your pants when I'm sitting right here."

"Well, technically we _have_ to keep it in our pants because we can't actually like, pull it out. It isn't exactly easy access when you're wearing pants." Emma said with a smirk.

"Emma!" Regina yelled again.

Henry let out a loud laugh, making his brunette mother glare at him.

"Both of you are ridiculous and need a good talking to. Go get ready for dinner at your Grandparents'. We have to be there in 45 minutes. And make sure you shower." Regina said to Henry.

Henry ran upstairs to get ready, leaving his mothers in the kitchen.

Regina hopped on the counter and pulled Emma by her t-shirt, wrapping her legs around the blonde's waist. The brunette captured Emma's lips with hers in a passionate kiss.

"We have 15 minutes before we get "vag-blocked" again. Let's do Sheriff." Regina purred, making Emma grin goofily.

* * *

Snow hasn't stopped talking since Emma and Regina announced their engagement and showed the rings. That was 15 minutes ago.

"It's such a beautiful story! You two are meant to be, and I can't believe it took this long. Regina we're family again! Emma, make sure you treat her right, she's a Queen. Regina, you better treat my little girl right, she's a princess and the Savior. Both of you better treat Henry right." Snow continued rambling on as the group finished their dinner, not noticing the eye rolls and long sighs.

Regina suddenly broke out in a wide smile. "Snow, didn't you need to talk to Emma and Henry about something?"

A look of confusion crossed Henry's face while Emma's eyes widened. _No. No. No. She didn't._ Emma looked at Regina who still had a smile plastered on her face. _She did._

A look of seriousness hit Snow's face. "Ah yes. Henry, Emma, I need to talk to you two." Snow wiped her mouth and pushed herself away from the table to stand. "Let's go into Emma's old room."

Emma and Henry shot Regina worried looks as they followed the short-haired brunette upstairs. Once they were upstairs and seated, Snow took a deep breath, looking as serious as ever.

"So, Regina tells me that you two have some questions about the human body and its sexual workings."

Emma groaned loudly and put her head in her hands. Henry looked completely shocked and uncomfortable.

"Grandma, w-we don't have any questions. We're good." He said quickly.

"Yeah Mom, I had a kid, so I think I know how sex works." Emma said shifting uncomfortably.

Snow held her hand up and shook her head firmly. "She also informed me that you both need a thorough talking to about how sex works and how to respect the idea of such an act. Now let's begin."

Emma and Henry sighed and sat back, awaiting their fate.

"Sex, is a magical, mystical, wonderful, sacred journey. Touching and breathing and heat and fondling, but it's so much more than that. But first, let's talk about the basics. Males, Henry that would be you, and females, Emma that's you, have different set ups."

Snow paused, pulling two plums, a banana, two cantaloupes, and half a peach out of her bag.

"Mom! What are those for?!" Emma exclaimed.

"Shhh. Now, males have a banana and two plums." She said as she handed the three fruits to Henry, "and females have two cantaloupes and half a peach." She then handed the remaining fruits to her daughter.

Henry and Emma looked at each other in horror.

"Now I want you to notice that Henry has very sensitive "fruits". They are damaged easily, especially the plums. Roll those plums around in your hand, Henry."

"Don't do that Henry."

"I'm not doing that Grandma."

Emma and Henry spoke simultaneously.

Snow glared at both of them and spoke sternly. "Roll. The. Plums. Henry."

Henry gulped and begins to roll the plums around in his right hand.

"Good! Now slowly raise the banana in your other hand." Henry did as told. "The banana rising is called an erection. Now Henry, keep that there. Now Emma, those cantaloupes represent the top part of a female, as known as breasts. They come in all shapes and sizes, so let's trade those out for oranges."

Mary Margaret handed Emma the oranges and Emma rolled her eyes.

"Now rub those oranges gently and DO NOT squeeze them."

Emma started juggling the oranges and Henry threw the two plums into her juggling act.

"EMMA! HENRY! THE ORANGES! THE PLUMS! STOP IT! THEY'RE SENSITIVE!" Snow shouted.

* * *

"Honestly Mom, I don't think I'll ever be able to eat a banana again." Henry said, as they walked into the mansion, returning from dinner.

Regina had laughed the entire car ride home at Henry and Emma reacting to Snow's sex lecture. And she was still doubled over in laughter.

"Gina stop laughing! My mother said the word "clitoris" and at one point she said, "Emma, you have experience in the vaginal area, please demonstrate to the class the proper tactics to arouse a woman. Please only use one finger. And remember this is a learning experience for Henry." Like what the hell, Regina?! And then she pealed the banana and said, "This is a soft penis. Notice it doesn't have much of an effect on the vagina." And then she proceeded to try and shove the banana into the peach!" Emma exclaimed as she walked in the living room and plopped on the couch.

"Ahhh! Please don't remind me Ma! I'm never having or even thinking about sex for a long time! I'm scarred for life!" Henry yelled as he ran upstairs to his room, causing Regina to laugh harder as she leaned against the back of the couch.

"Regina I can't believe you put us through that. She literally said, and I quote, "There's basically one way to have sex and that's called the missionary position. Anything else is too radical and unsafe. Missionary keeps the mission fun and safe." Like I can take the ridiculous fruits and analogies, but teaching our son that there's only one position for sex? That's where I draw the line Regina." Emma said with a huff.

Regina's laughter finally died down and she sat down on the couch next to the blonde.

"Don't worry dear, we'll give him a proper talking to. But I am glad that you know what you're doing in the bedroom. And I promise I'll never put you through that again. But you have to admit it was hilarious." Regina said with a smirk.

Emma looked at her fiancée w/ a glare. "Once again, babe, we have a very different sense of humor."

"Oh come on Em. If I was in your position you'd still be on the floor laughing, as I sat in agony." Regina said, shoving Emma's shoulder.

"Okay, that's true. Now THAT would be hilarious." Emma said with a smirk, as she thought about Regina being in her situation.

They sat in a comfortable silence for quite a while, both caught up in their thoughts.

"Regina…baby…I need to talk to you about something." Emma said after a while.

Hearing the seriousness in the blonde's voice, Regina's heart sped up and she swallowed nervously. "Okay, I'm listening."

"We're getting married. I'm excited about that. And I don't wanna seem pushy or anything because we just got engaged today, but… I need you to promise me something. Promise me that when we finally start planning the wedding you won't over work yourself and get too stressed. Promise me you'll either do mayor stuff or wedding stuff, not try to do both at the same time. Promise me you'll let me help and tell me what you need me to do. Promise me when you work with Belle and Ruby and my Mom, that you won't throw fireballs at them and scare them away. And promise me you'll at least listen to my mother's suggestions." Emma said with a small smile.

Regina chuckled. "And promise me you'll keep your mother's bad ideas away from me. Promise me you'll actually pay attention to the taste of the cakes when we go to choose a wedding cake and not just eat them. Promise me that you'll give your input and won't just agree with everything to try and make me happy. Promise me we'll help each other keep these promises."

Emma grinned and kissed Regina's forehead. "I promise, Gina."

"I promise too, Em. But hypothetically, if your mother does get out of line, what would you have me to do? Because I can become very creative when I need to." Regina said with a hint of a smile.

Emma threw her head back with a laugh. "Have I ever told you how much I love you?"

Regina grinned widely and pecked the blonde on the cheek. "I love you too, my love."


	10. Kept Promises

**2 Months Later**

"Regina Ann Mills!" Emma yelled as she entered the mansion.

"That is NOT my middle name!" a shout from Regina came through the house.

Emma grinned slightly. She had been trying to guess Regina's middle name for the longest, but she had yet to guess correctly. Once, last week, she guessed the name Margret and she had to sleep on the couch for two nights. But it was definitely worth seeing the hilarious looks that passed across Regina's face. _Classic._ Emma entered the study to find Regina sitting at her desk looking through magazines, Belle and Ruby arranging a seating chart, and Mary Margret…tied up and talking, but no sound was coming out of her mouth.

"Yeah yeah whatever. What the hell is going on here?" Emma said, taking in the scene before her.

Regina looked up from her magazine and shrugged nonchalantly. "Wedding planning. What does it look like?"

Emma rolled her eyes. "I know that. But why are you here? We were supposed to meet for lunch. And also, why is my mother tied up and silenced? And why are you two letting it happen?" Emma asked, as she addressed everyone in the room.

"Yes we were supposed to meet for lunch. Hence, the reason I told David to tell you that I was here. I figured we could eat lunch and get some work done for the wedding." Regina said, looking back down at her magazine.

"And my mother?" Emma asked impatiently.

Regina rolled her eyes, but Ruby spoke up. "Look Emma, I love M&M just as much you do but this time I agree with Regina's tactics. She just wouldn't shut up with the bad ideas."

"I'm sure the ideas weren't that bad you guys." Emma argued.

"Emma…she suggested that the bridesmaid dresses be made from picnic tablecloths. I can handle a lot of nonsense, but that's too far." Belle interjected.

Emma cringed. The fact that Belle agreed with this said a lot, but Emma pressed forward. "You guys, that's _one_ bad idea. At least let her defend herself." Emma waved her hand, giving Mary Margret her voice back.

"Oh Emma! Thank goodness! Your soon to be wife and your friends here, are not fond of out of the box ideas!" Mary Margaret yelled as she still struggled to get out of the ties.

Emma watched as Regina, Ruby, and Belle simultaneously rolled their eyes and groaned.

"W-well Mom, it is our wedding. If Regina doesn't like an idea, then she doesn't like it. And I wholeheartedly agree that a picnic theme is utterly disgusting nonsense." Emma said.

"Ha!" Regina and Ruby said in sync.

" _However_ , that is no reason for them to take away your ability to talk." Emma said with a pointed glare at the other three women.

"Ha!" Snow shouted with a smirk.

"Snow…why don't you tell Emma what your last idea was." Belle said with a certain glint in her eyes.

Ruby and Regina smirked. "Yeah M&M, tell your sweet daughter what your last suggestion was." Ruby said.

Emma turned to her mother to see her smiling proudly. "Oh sweetheart, it was my best idea yet! Imagine this! You're walking down the aisle in a big, fluffy, bubblegum pink dress and -"

Emma raised her hand, using magic to shut her mother up.

"Okay, I see your point. Totally justified. I get it. BUT Regina, baby I want to have lunch with you. No wedding plans or work, just you and me. Can we do that please?" Emma asked, looking at her fiancée with pleading eyes.

Regina knew Emma had been getting tired of all of the wedding planning. She had to admit that it was a lot of planning and Emma could only take so much organization. The past 2 months have been filled with planning and long discussions and arguments. The last 2 months had definitely been a test on their relationship. A stressed Regina and a stressed Emma was definitely a change of pace. Throughout the stress, they discovered just how important communication was. Things worked better when they addressed issues as soon as they happened and not weeks later. And that's what was happening now. Emma wanted alone time and she was telling Regina straight up instead of pouting or swallowing her feelings, which is something Regina appreciated.

Regina smiled and walked over to the blonde. "Actually, let's take the rest of the day off. We can go to lunch and spend the rest of the day doing what we please. How does that sound?"

Emma smiled and pulled Regina in for a kiss. "That sounds great. You know Regina, you sort of broke a promise." Emma said with a smirk.

Regina pulled back slightly to look at the blonde. "And what promise is that?"

Emma rolled her eyes teasingly and scoffed. "Regina, you tortured my mother. That was part of the promise. You promised you wouldn't do that."

Regina stepped back, crossing her arms and fixing Emma with a playful glare. "I did not such thing. The promise was that I would not throw fireballs at her or scare her off. And that I would listen to her suggestions. As you can see she has no burn marks and she hasn't run away in fear. And I did listen to her ridiculous suggestions. So, _Miss Swan_ , I did not break our contract. However, it was rather hard to resist the urge to knock your mother unconsciousness. If anything, you should be thanking me."

Emma threw her head back in laughter, and wrapped her arm around Regina's waist, leading them out of the mansion. "Well, thank you babe. I know it must have been soooo hard for you, Regina _Janet_ Mills."

"THAT IS NOT MY MIDDLE NAME!"

* * *

**2 weeks Later**

"Wait, where are you all going again?" Henry asked with his head tilted.

Regina looked around to see if the area was clear for her to speak. "We're going to taste um…sweet, fluffy, icing covered bread."

Henry raised an eyebrow. "Mom, don't you mean cake?"

Regina covered his mouth with her hand and looked around frantically. "Henry shhhh! Look, you've been on that camping trip with your class for the last 2 weeks so you haven't had to live with the hell that is your other mother. Ever since last week when I told her we'd be going to the dessert tasting today, she's been singing, almost any song related to the word "cake" every time she sees it or someone mentions it. Please Henry, I can't take it anymore. I think she's finally forgotten that we're going today so please." Regina whispered.

Henry smiled and shook his head. "Mom, I think you're over exaggerating. Plus there aren't even that many songs about cake."

Just then Emma came running down stairs with the widest grin on her face. "She want that cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake!"

Regina put her hands in her head and groaned while Henry watched his blonde mother dance around and sing about cake.

"Ooh baby, I like it, you so excited, don't try to hide it. I'mma make you my bitch. Cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake!" Emma continued to dance around and sing entertaining her son and annoying her fiancée.

"Em pleeeasseee stop. Cake is not that important to be singing and dancing about." Regina said with a sigh.

Emma froze. "R-Regina…you don't mean that. Take it back. You would never say something like that."

Regina rolled her eyes and turned towards Henry. "Two weeks Henry. She's been like this for two weeks. I've had to deal with this by myself." Regina kissed his forehead and turned to walk out the door to the car.

Emma came out of her shock, kissed Henry goodbye and ran after Regina. "Regina please tell me you didn't mean that! Cake is beautiful!"

Henry shook his head and closed the door. "I'll never be able to listen to that song again."

* * *

**An Hour Later**

They pulled up outside of the building where their appointment was scheduled. The building was small but every elegant from the looks of it. The sign on the building said, "Cake & Bake", causing Regina to roll her eyes.

"How did Ruby find this place?" She turned and asked the blonde.

Emma shrugged. "Eh who cares. There's cake in there and I wanna get to it."

Regina rolled her eyes. "Okay Emma, you have to keep your promise. You promised me you wouldn't just eat the cakes, but you'd actually taste them and keep up with what they taste like. This isn't a free meal. You're going to choose your cake, I'll choose mine, and then we'll choose one together."

"Yeah yeah yeah babe, I get it. _Taste_ the cakes, don't _waste_ the cakes. I got it. Now let's get in there." Emma said as she opened the door for Regina and followed her into the building.

* * *

**15 minutes later**

"Well who's the one breaking promises now?" Regina said with a huff.

Emma rolled her eyes and attempted to kiss Regina's cheek, but the brunette pulled away.

"Oh come on Gina, I'm totally keeping my promise right now."

"Oh really? You just tasted 3 different cakes in less than 2 minutes. How could you possibly have actually tasted them?"

"Babe I have a very specific palate. I know what I like and what I don't like. Don't worry, I've got this."

* * *

**45 minutes later**

Twenty. Emma has tasted twenty different types of cake. And no, she didn't just take a bite of each cake. No, she ate each piece of cake, along with 2 cups of milk. Regina on the other hand had only needed to taste 4 types of cake to make her decision. She decided on a red velvet cake, with cream cheese frosting. It was simple but very elegant. Plus she liked the taste. It was a good cake. Emma on the other hand…well she finished tasting all of her cakes in the first 30 minutes. She had been sitting there in silence since she tasted the last cake.

"Emma, are you done yet?" Regina asked in annoyance. "You probably don't even know which one tasted the best, judging how fast you ate them."

Emma sat up straight with a very serious look on her face. "Well cake #14 was very moist but almost too moist to enjoy. #2 was good but it was missing a hint of something that I can't quite place my finger on. #7-13 were mediocre at best. I mean, don't get me wrong they were delicious, but they just didn't give me that spark I was looking for. #20 though? Cake #20 was made with love and care. The frosting was made by the hands of angels and it smells the way I imagine a unicorn's farts would smell: sweet and full of hope. I choose #20."

Regina and their host, Evelyn, stared in shock. _How is it possible that she remembered how each cake tasted after she scarfed all of them down so fast? And unicorn farts? Jesus Emma._

As if reading her mind, Emma turned to her fiancée and smirked. "I told you. I have a very specific palate. I know what I like and what I don't like. I have good taste babe. How else would I have ended up with you?" Emma said with a wink.

* * *

**An hour and a half later**

Regina looked over to the passenger seat and smiled at the sight. Emma was laid back in her seat with her feet propped up and fast asleep.

"Em, it's time to wake up, we're home." Regina said with a soft voice, as she reached over to unbuckle the blonde's seatbelt.

Emma sat up and smiled lazily while looking at the brunette for a while. "Regina…I love you."

Regina smiled and blushed slightly. "I love you too sweetheart."

"We're getting married."

"I know."

They sat in content silence, looking at each other.

"I like you."

Regina let out a laugh and smiled. "I like you too Em."

Emma smiled and held the brunette's hand. "I had a good time with you today."

Regina rolled her eyes playfully and smiled. "Emma Swan, you're making me feel like a teenager."

Emma smirked. "Maybe that was the plan."

"Well then, are we going to make out in the car like teenagers too? Because I wouldn't be opposed to that." Regina said shyly.

Emma leaned forward and kissed the lipstick covered lips in front of her. Their lips moved together passionately and slowly, both of them basking in the other's smell and taste and presence. A knock on the window made them both jump apart.

"Hey! Stop acting like horny teenagers! Get out the car and come feed your son some dinner!" Henry said with a smirk.

Emma turned to Regina in fake shock. "You have a kid?!"

Regina rolled her eyes and laughed as she got out of the car. "Um, no _you_ have a kid!"

"Oh so he's my kid when he wants to eat?" Emma said, stepping out of the car.

"That's completely accurate. He didn't' get that appetite from me."

"Hey, I'm a growing man! I need food. Ma doesn't have an excuse for her appetite. Now let's go inside so you too can tell me about the cake tasting." Henry said as he took both of his mother's hands and dragged them into the house.

"Cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake!" Emma started singing, as the two brunettes groaned.

* * *

 

"We need to do something."

Emma paused the game she was playing on her phone to look at the brunette. "What do you mean dear?"

Regina looked up from her book to make eye contact with the Emma. "I mean that we need to do something. Have you noticed how Henry has been a little clingy lately? I think we've all been a little busy lately with him at school and us working and all of us doing wedding planning. I think we all need to take a vacation with just the three of us. I think Henry misses spending time with us and I have to agree that I miss it too. I think we need a vacation without wedding planning or work or school."

Emma sat for a while thinking about Regina's words. It was true that they had been very busy lately. Every conversation seemed to revolve around the wedding or work or school. It's even been a while since they had a movie night. Regina was right. They needed a break.

"Okay. So where do you want to go? Actually when do you want to go? Because Henry still has school so…"

"Well his spring break is next week so I say we go then. As for where we go? I think we should let Henry decide." Regina said with a smile.

"HENRRRYYYYYYYY!" Emma yelled, ignoring her fiancée's annoyed face.

Henry walked into their room with his eyes glued to his phone. "Ma, I'm gonna beat you this time so be on the lookout."

Emma scoffed and rolled her eyes. "Oh please kid. You've lost 4 times in a row. There's no hope for you."

Regina raised an eyebrow. "What exactly are you two talking about?"

Henry walked over to his brunette mother and showed her his phone. "We've been playing words with friends."

Regina looked between Emma and Henry. "And you all haven't asked me to play?"

Emma laughed. "Oh please Regina, you barely even use your phone!"

Henry shook his head. "Ma's just scared that you'll beat her. She wants to remain the champion."

Emma scoffed and leaned over to get Regina's phone. After a few minutes she handed the phone to Regina. "Here. The game is on there now. Whenever you're ready to get beat just start a game with me. I'll destroy you like I destroyed our son." Emma said with a smug smile.

Regina rolled her eyes and sat her phone on her nightstand. "Duly noted. Henry sit down we need to talk to you."

Henry looked skeptically and sat in the middle of the bed.

"We're going on vacation for spring break. Where do you want to go?" Emma asked.

Henry furrowed his eyebrows and his mouth hung open. "Wait…we're doing what?"

Regina smiled at her son's surprise. "Henry we're all tired. We think it's time to take a break from school and work and wedding planning to just go have fun and relax. We miss spending time with you. So where would you like to go? We're letting you choose."

A wide grin spread across Henry's face. "You know, I would say Disney World, just because I know it would be a funny experience, but I think we should go to a beach. I think that would be pretty relaxing. Plus we all need a little sun. So maybe Myrtle Beach or Panama City Beach?"

Emma smiled and looked at Regina. "Okay, I think we can make that happen. What do you think Regina? A trip to the beach?"

Regina leaned forward to ruffle Henry's hair. "I think a trip to the beach sounds excellent."

"Well I'll plan everything and then we can leave early Sunday morning. So we have 3 days to pack." Emma said with a smile.

Regina and Henry both looked at her with lifted eyebrows.

"What?" She asked.

"You're gonna make the plans? Ma you hate planning." Henry said.

"I'd have to agree dear. Maybe I should plan this one." Regina said.

Emma looked at them with shock. "You guys! I can plan this! If there's nothing else I know how to plan, I can plan a vacation. Shhhh, just trust me. I've got this."

Regina and Henry looked at each other with the same thought in mind.

_This is going to be interesting._


	11. I Declare War

"Regina, what the hell did you pack in this bag?" Emma huffed as she loaded the last bag into the SUV.

Regina simply rolled her eyes. "Only the essentials dear."

Emma opened the zipper of the bag and gasped. "Oh hellllllll no Regina! You packed heels?! We're going to the beach, not to some business meeting in Arizona. I'm unpacking this."

Regina rushed over to the blonde and pulled her away from the luggage. "Oh no you're not. My heels are perfectly fine. I packed all jeans and shorts like you wanted me too, now let me at least have my heels."

Emma glared at her fiancée for a minute. "Regina your feet are going to hurt in those heels."

Regina scoffed. "Oh please. I'm a professional. Plus I packed my pair of sneakers so I'll be fine. But fine, I'll compromise with you. I'll unpack my heels, if you unpack that hideous red jacket of yours."

Emma's eyes widened and she closed the trunk.

"Alright, let's go. No time to discuss things that aren't important. "

Regina smirked. "Exactly what I thought. Now give me the keys."

"Uh, no. I'm driving Regina." Emma said, holding the keys above her head.

Regina glared at her, and was about to speak before she was interrupted by the sound of Snow's voice.

"Could you two please hurry up and decide. We're all waiting in the car and you're holding up this adventure." Snow said.

Both Regina and Emma rolled their eyes.

"Please tell me again why your parents are accompanying us?" Regina said, clearly irritated.

Emma sighed. "Because she got the wrong idea when I said, "family vacation" and started crying and talking about how happy she was that we decided to invite them."

Regina sighed and smiled a little. "And you, ever the Charming, couldn't say no."

Emma smirked and put her arms around the brunette's waist. "Well that's why you fell in love with me right? Because of my charming personality and kindness to people."

Regina rolled her eyes and scoffed. "It had more to do with how well your ass looks in those jeans. But sure, let's go with your charming personality and kindness to the peasants."

Emma feigned shock and put her hand over her heart. "Why Regina, you make me feel like such a piece of meat."

Regina raised her eyebrow. "Oh please Emma, don't act like I don't notice how you look at me when I'm dressed for work. You look at me like a starving dog looks at a steak."

Snow leaned her head out of the front seat window and yelled. "The eye sex between you two is completely equal. Now can we please go?!"

Emma tossed to keys to Regina and jogged around to get in the car. "You can drive."

Regina threw her head back with a sigh. _This is going to be a long drive._

* * *

Everyone was on edge. Snow had been playing her Mary Poppins Playlist on her iPod and singing along, and with each line everyone got more agitated.

"Just a spoon full of sugar makes the medicine go down, in the most delightful wayyyy! Just a spoon full of suga-"

"SNOW WILL YOU SHUT UP AND CUT THAT OFF! I'M SO TIRED OF LISTENING TO THAT CHEERFUL HOE!" Regina yelled, startling everyone.

Snow pressed pause on her iPod and frowned.

"Regina honestly, there's no need for such a reaction. Mary Poppins is a musical masterpiece. No one else is complaining. They're all fine with it. Right guys?" She turned to look at her husband, grandson, and daughter in the backseat.

They all shook their heads.

"No."

"Not really."

"Hell no."

Snow huffed and unplugged her device. "Fine. You all think you could do better I'd like to see you try." She said handing the aux cord to the back seat.

Henry immediately grabbed it and plugged it into his phone. He scrolled through his phone before he decided on a song. When the beat started, a grin spread across his blonde mother's face and they started singing together.

 _Oh no_  
See you walking 'round like it's a funeral  
Not so serious, girl; why those feet cold?  
We just getting started; don't you tip toe, tip toe

Regina looked in the rearview mirror with a smile as she saw her fiancée and son singing their hearts out to the song. She had to admit, it had quickly become one of her favorites. Snow on the other hand was not impressed. _  
_

_Ah!_  
Waste time with a masterpiece, don't waste time with a masterpiece (huh!)  
You should be rolling with me, you should be rolling with me (ah)  
You're a real life fantasy, you're a real life fantasy (huh!)  
But you're moving so carefully; let's start living dangerously

_Talk to me, baby  
I'm going blind from this sweet, sweet craving, whoa_

_Let's lose our minds and go fucking crazy_  
Ah ya ya ya ya I keep on hoping we'll eat cake by the ocean

Snow gasped and turned down the volume. "You people call this filth music?! Turn it to something else!"

Emma whined. "Aww turn it back up! This song is legit!"

Regina turned up the volume again, completely ignoring Snow's protest.

Once the song was over Snow turned to look at the two in the backseat.

"Okay how about we do this. You play a song, and then I'll play a song. That way everybody gets a taste of everything."

Emma and Henry wrinkled their noses in semi-disgust. "Fine, just tone down the musicals." Henry said.

Snow nodded her head. "Well tone down the filth."

Henry handed Snow the aux cord but soon regretted it, as did everyone else when the song she had chosen begin to play throughout the speakers.

 _It's a world of laughter, a world of tears_  
It's a world of hopes and a world of fears  
There's so much that we share that it's time we're aware  
It's a small world after all

Regina gripped the steering wheels until her knuckles were white, meanwhile the three in the backseat groaned and put their hands over their ears.

 _It's a small world after all_  
It's a small world after all  
It's a small world after all  
It's a small, small world.

Before Snow could hand the cord to the backseat, Regina snatched it. "I'll take that. I have a song that I would like to play. I'm sure you'll love it Snow." She said with a smirk.

As soon as the song came on, Henry and Emma grinned, hearing the shriek that came from the short haired brunette.

 _See me up in the club with 50-leven girls_  
Posted in the back diamond fangs in my grill  
Brooklyn brim with my eyes sittin' low  
Every boy in here with me got that smoke  
And every girl in here gotta look me up and down  
All on Instagram, cake by the pound  
Circulate the image every time I come around  
G's up, tell me how I'm lookin' babe

"Regina!"

 _Boy, this all for you, just walk my way_  
Just tell me how it's lookin' babe  
I do this all for you, baby, just take aim  
And tell me how it's lookin', babe (how it's looking)  
And tell me how I'm lookin', babe (lookin' babe)

Snow looked in the backseat to see her daughter and grandson singing along and…David?

"David you know this song?!"

David looked up at Snow and rolled his eyes. "Sweetheart, it's Queen Bey! Everyone knows this song!"

Snow's mouth dropped as she watched David singing the next part with no trouble.

 _Drop the bass, man, the bass get lower  
Radio say, "Speed it up, " I just go slower  
High like treble, puffin' on them mids  
The man ain't ever seen a booty like this  
And why you think you keep my name rollin' off the tongue?  
Cause when you wanna smash, I just write another one  
I sneezed on the beat and the beat got sicker  
Yoncé all on his mouth like liquor ___  
Like, like liquor, like, like, like liquor  
Yoncé all on his mouth like liquor   
Like, like liquor, like, like, like liquor

Snow turned the radio down gaining protests and glares from everyone.

"How does everyone know this song but me?" She asked.

Everyone looked at each other and back at Snow. "I think the real question is, how do you NOT know this song?" Emma said.

"Yeah Grandma. This is Beyoncé. Everyone knows Beyoncé."

Snow put her finger on her chin and thought for a moment. "Beyoncé. That name sounds familiar. Is she from Egypt?"

Everyone in the car looked at her with raised eyebrows and disgusted expressions.

"What in the world would make you think she was from Egypt?" Regina asked highly irritated.

Snow shrugged. "I don't know. Is she a new singer?"

Once again everyone looked at her with angered expressions. "No Snow, she's not new!" David said rather loudly.

"Well excuse me for not being a part of all sin that obviously goes on in this family."

Everyone rolled their eyes but stayed quiet.

Snow cleared her throat. "So…do you think you all could educate me on some of this music?"

Everyone seemed to think it over for a moment. "Yeah sure, Grandma we can hook you up." Henry said with a grin.

Snow smiled, clearly pleased. "Okay good. Just no filth please."

Regina smirked devilishly. "Oh my dear Snow, you can't escape the filth."

* * *

"That car ride was literally the worst and best thing that I've ever experienced." Emma said as she fell on the bed.

They had finally arrived to Panama City Beach and they had just gotten finished moving into their room. Their room was complete with two master bedrooms, a couch that doubled as a pullout sofa, a kitchen, a living room, and balcony that faced the beach.

"It was honestly a form of torture that I wouldn't even wish on my worst enemies. Not even Rumple." Regina said, as she fell next to Emma.

Emma gave her a knowing glance.

"Okay fine, maybe Rumple, but still. Your mother is completely insane." Regina said with a shudder thinking of the events that took place in the car.

Emma sat up on her elbows and looked at the brunette. "I can't believe you drove off, leaving her at the gas station." She said with a chuckle.

Regina glared at her. "I can't believe you all made me turn around and go get her. You know it was better without her in there running her mouth."

Emma smiled and got up to straddle Regina. "Well now that we're alone, I think we should definitely take advantage of that."

Regina smirked and pulled Emma down by her shirt, almost connecting their lips. "And how do you suppose we do that?"

Emma played with the hem of Regina's shirt and slid her hands underneath. "Well, first of all, you have too many clothes on. And with the way my body is aching for you right now, I think we should get these clothes off, as soon as possible." Emma licked Regina's bottom lip, gaining a moan from the brunette. "Because I really, really want to taste you right now." Emma nibbled Regina's bottom lip before claiming her lips in a passionate kiss. Their tongue's danced around tasting each other. As if her hands had minds of their own, Emma begin unbuckling Regina's pants. Both of them were so lost in each other, that they didn't hear the door open.

"Are you kidding me?! We just got here! And that doesn't look safe." Snow basically yelled.

Regina and Emma groaned and closed their eyes.

"Snow, I swear on everything…" Regina started.

"Mom, give us a minute and we'll be out." Emma said. She waited until the door closed and looked back at Regina who had on a death glare.

"I swear we better have the best mind-blowing sex tonight, or I will kill her." Regina said as she sat up.

Emma hummed in agreement and stood up.

"How about we play a game?" she said.

Regina raised her eyebrow. "What kind of game?"

Emma took Regina's hands and swung them back and forth. "Well we're going to go get something to eat, and probably sight-see a little bit. We can use that time to work up each other. Whoever gives in first loses." Emma said with a smirk.

Regina smiled and raised an eyebrow. "Are you sure you're ready to lose Sheriff? I know how much I get you worked up." She said with a husky voice.

Emma smiled and quickly pulled Regina close, sticking her hand into the brunette's still unbuttoned pants. "Really Madam Mayor? Because you seem to be extremely wet right now." Emma slipped her hands into the pair of lace underwear and began to rub Regina's clit.

Regina threw her head back and gripped Emma's shirt. However, just as quickly as the touch was there, it was gone. She opened her eyes to see Emma standing there sucking her finger. "Let the games begin Madam Mayor." Emma said with a wink, as she exited the room.

Regina glared at the door as it closed. _This is war._


	12. Operation Get Horny

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Let the games begin

Snow, David, Henry, and Regina stood in the lobby of the Wyndham Resort waiting for Emma to finish talking to the front desk attendant. Regina took this moment to plan for her revenge on Emma. Not only had the blonde gotten an unfair advantage, but she had also changed into a white and blue muscle shirt which made Regina weak in the knees. And Emma knew it. She knew that Regina loved the sight of her muscular arms. Regina was already off to a weak start, but she wouldn't let Emma's muscular arms distract her. No, she would not lose, especially to a game like this.

"Henry, my Prince, how are you doing? Enjoying yourself so far?" Regina asked, as she threw her arm around her son's shoulder.

Henry narrowed his eyes. "Okay, what do you want?" he asked.

Regina's mouth dropped and she put her hand on her chest, looking completely shocked. "What makes you think I want something?"

Henry rolled his eyes. "Mom, you only use 'my prince' when I've done something really good or when you want something. And I haven't done anything good so you must want something."

Regina sighed. _It's my fault he's so smart._ "Fine, I need you to do me a favor. Your mother and I are playing a certain…game and I need you to help me out."

Henry tilted his head in interest. "What kind of game?"

Regina avoided his eye contact and cleared her throat. "I don't think you'd want to know the details of the game."

Henry crossed his arms and scoffed. "Well I'm not helping you until you tell me."

Regina rolled her eyes. "Fine. Your mother and I are having a competition to see who can work the other up more…you know sex wise. So I-"

"Ahhh! Okay you're right I didn't want to know that. Just tell me what you want me to do." Henry said with a look of disgust.

Regina smiled. "Okay, when she comes back over here I'm going to ask her to go back up to the room with me because I forgot something. Now here's where you come in, when we come back downstairs, I need you to stay by her the entire time. Don't' leave her side whatsoever, for the entire day."

Henry frowned and tilted his head. "Oookay but how is that going to help?"

"Oh don't you worry your pretty little head about that. Just know that it'll work." Regina said with a smirk.

"Okay, everybody ready to go?" Emma asked cheerfully as she walked up to the group.

Regina winked at Henry as she stepped towards Emma. "Yes dear we're ready, however I think I left something upstairs. So I'll have to go get it. Come with me?"

Emma nodded and handed the brochures to David. "Sure babe. You guys pick somewhere to go and we'll be back."

* * *

"I know what you're trying to do Regina." Emma said with a smirk as they stepped into the elevator to go up.

Regina raised her eyebrow as she pressed their floor number. "I'm not doing anything Emma. I simply forgot something in the room."

Emma hummed but didn't reply. The elevator dinged as they arrived on their floor, Regina being the first to exit with Emma following behind.

"Okay, so then what did you forget?" Emma asked skeptically.

Regina smirked as she opened the door to their room. "You'll see." She muttered.

Regina went to their rbedoom, closing the door before Emma could enter.

"You did not just close the door in my face." Emma said with the hint of a smile. "Come on Gina, I'm not going to try anything, let me in." She said as she jiggled the handle of the bedroom door.

Regina smirked as she took off her shoes, pants, and underwear. "I know you won't try anything because you're going to stay out there until I come out." She heard Emma huff and walk away from the door. Regina quickly went to her luggage to find what she was looking for. She quickly took out the new pair of short jean shorts that she had bought without Emma knowing and one of Emma's red flannels that she had secretly packed. She put on the light blue shorts, tied the flannel around her waist, and put on her new white Chuck Taylors. She took a look at herself in the mirror and smiled widely. The new shorts she had on were shorter than any of her other shorts and her legs looked absolutely fabulous in them. The flannel looked good around her waist and she knew Emma would practically drool at the sight. Emma loved Regina's legs and she loved it even more when Regina wore her clothes. _Oh yes, I will definitely win this game._

Regina opened the door to see Emma sitting on the counter in the kitchen drinking a glass of water. Regina ignored the flutter in her stomach and cleared her throat. "Okay, I'm ready to go." She said, heading out the door, not waiting for the blonde.

She heard the blonde go into a coughing fit and scramble to catch up with her, causing her smirk to deepen.

"Regina, what the hell?!" Emma said as she caught with the brunette at the elevator.

Regina turned and raised an eyebrow. "What dear? My pants were getting a little hot." Regina shrugged with nonchalance.

"Where the hell did you get those shorts?! And is that my shirt?"

"Of course it's your shirt Em. And I got these a few days ago. Do you like them?" Regina asked as she batted her eyelashes and she entered the elevator, luckily it was empty.

Emma looked her up and down and licked her lips. "Hell yeah I like them." She said as she stepped towards the brunette. Regina bit back a smirk as she put her arms around the blonde's neck.

"Are you sure it looks okay?" Regina said looking at the blonde's lips.

Emma pulled Regina close, their lips almost touching. "You look sexy as fuck Regina. I'm so tempted to finish what we started earlier."

Regina licked and nibbled Emma's bottom lip, causing the blonde to let out a soft moan. "Really? But then you would lose our little game, Sheriff."

Emma threw her head back and let out a frustrated huff, stepping away from the brunette. _Damn, I forgot about that._ "Ugh, Regina I know what you're trying to do and it won't work. Just because you look extra super sexy and I want to take you right now in this elevator doesn't mean I will. I'm not letting you win this one." Emma said with a determined face and crossed arms.

Regina smirked at her clearly frustrated fiancée. "Well, then the game shall continue." Hearing the elevator ding, Regina leaned forward to whisper in Emma's ear. "Oh, and I'm not wearing any underwear."

Regina turned to exit the elevator, leaving a shocked and flustered Sheriff.

Emma let out a groan and stomped out of the elevator following her fiancée. _There is no way I'm going to win this._

* * *

Emma was completely frustratingly mesmerized. They had decided to walk down the street to see all of the stores that were around the resort and near the beach, and then later they would go eat dinner. However, Emma had barely seen anything except for the back of Regina's ass. It's not as if Emma wasn't aware of how gorgeous her fiancée was, but she had never seen Regina in something like this. The brunette looked completely sexy and cute and adorable and also hot as fuck, and that combination made Emma feel like a horny teenage boy. It didn't help that every time she tried to get remotely near Regina to try to get some revenge, Henry was there. He was basically clinging to her and she couldn't shake him enough to make a move. Not that she had an actual plan any way. She had no clue how to outdo Regina right now. She had gotten Regina worked up and Regina responded full force, bringing out the big guns. Emma pulled out her phone. She was playing this game with the Queen of Seduction, she needed help from the second most seductive person she knew.

 **Emma:** Dude I need your HELP!

 **Rubes:** Bruh, pls tell me u havent messed up the vacay already…

 **Emma:** No, but I still need your help.

 **Rubes:** Wat'd u do?

 **Emma:** Long story short, I challenged Regina…in who can get who more sexually worked up…

 **Rubes:** Oh Emma…

 **Emma:** I started off strong, I did…

 **Rubes:** Ok so what happened?

Emma snapped a picture of Regina looking at some swimsuits and sent it Ruby.

 **Emma:** (1 attachment sent)

 **Rubes:** SWEET MOTHER! EMMA WHAT THE FUCK?! I CANT HELP YOU! U LOST!

 **Emma:** PLEASEEEEEE! Give me advice! What would u do?

 **Rubes:** …damn okay…give me some time to think.

 **Rubes:** Ok, if I were you, I would play to my strengths. For u that's ur arms. And abs. Arms and abs, Emma, arms and Abs.

 **Emma** : Hmmm, okay I think I have an idea. Thnks Rubes.

 **Rubes:** Good luck boo!

Emma looked to her left to see Henry there. "Hey kid, I need your help with something."

Henry rolled his eyes. "Ugh, not you too." He murmured.

Emma narrowed her eyes. "What do you mean?"

Henry shook his head quickly. "Uh nothing Ma, what's up?"

Emma crossed her arms. "Nuh-uh, what do you mean, 'not you too'? And why have you been following me around since we left the lobby? Is this another one of your operations? Want me to buy you something?"

Henry sighed and pulled his blonde mother behind a clothes rack. "Okay look, don't say anything, but Mom told me about you guys' little game, which is gross by the way. Anyway, she told me to stay by your side all day." Henry whispered.

Emma's jaw dropped. "I knew something was up! There's no way a 15 year old would follow his mother around while on vacation, especially with all the girls around this place. So what's the catch? Did she pay you to do this or something?"

Henry shrugged. "I don't know what the catch is. She just said it would help her plan. And no she didn't pay me Ma."

Emma snapped her fingers as she thought of something. "Of course! She knew that if you stayed by my side it'd be harder to make my move. Ha! Oh I'm totally winning this thing." Emma pulled some money out of her pocket and handed to Henry. "Here kid, now leave me alone. And go have fun. But before you do that, I need your help."

Henry looked at the money and back to his blonde mother. "Five bucks? Really Ma? What am I supposed to do with this?"

Emma rolled her eyes. "Regina didn't even pay you, you're lucky you got that! Plus you already have money."

Henry rolled his eyes. "Fine, I guess this will do for hush money. So what's the plan?"

Emma smirked. "Pull my shirt."

Henry scrunched up his face and furrowed his eyebrows. "Wait what?"

Emma rolled her eyes. "Look kid, your Mom is playing her strengths right now. Which is her entire body, but mainly ass and legs. Now I have to play to my strengths, which is abs and arms. Abs and arms, Henry, Abs and arms. So I need you to pull my shirt as hard as you can, so it'll rip, and I'll have a reason to take my shirt off."

Henry shook his head. "Ma, that's a stupid plan. Why don't you just spill a lot of soda on it? That's still a reason to take the shirt off."

Emma scoffed. "I don't wanna get all sticky kid!"

Henry slapped his forehead. "Ma, that's exactly what you want. Think about it. How would you react if you saw mom all sticky and stuff?"

Emma's eyes widened. "Ohhh! Okay yeah yeah yeah, that's good. I saw an ice cream shop a few stores down. I'll go buy some ice cream and then the plan will commence. Operation 'Get Horny' is a go."

"Please Ma…don't ever say that again." Henry said with a look of disgust and shake of his head.

"Yeah yeah, just go distract your Mom while I go get the ice cream." Emma said as she hurried out of the store.

Henry shook his head and grinned as he watched his blonde mother leave the store. _I thought I left all the ridiculousness in Storybrooke. This is going to be interesting._


	13. Operation Get Horny: Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Who comes out on top? (pun intended)

"Henry, why aren't you with your Mother?" Regina asked, narrowing her eyes at her son.

Henry shrugged nonchalantly. "She went to go get ice cream and told me to stay here."

Regina squinted looking for a lie, but he seemed to be telling the truth. "Hm, okay then. How do you like these sunglasses?" Regina asked, putting on the black sunglasses and turning towards her son.

"I think they look hot, babe." Emma said, as she approached the two. "Oh here's that ice cream Henry."

Henry rolled his eyes as his blonde mother handed him the ice cream with a wink. "Thanks Ma." Henry took the ice cream cone and clumsily dropped it on Emma's shirt, rubbing the ice cream around on her shirt and stomach. "Oh no, sorry Ma!" Henry said unconvincingly.

Regina rolled her eyes at the bad acting she was witnessing.

"Oh no, Henry! It's all on me! I guess I'll have to take my shirt off now…ya know since it's ruined." Emma said, as she started taking her shirt slowly.

Regina's mouth went dry as she took in Emma's sports black bra and toned abs. She racked her eyes up the blonde's body, meeting a smug smile, as the woman discreetly flexed her biceps.

Regina swallowed loudly and grabbed Henry by the arm, pulling him to the side. "Henry Daniel Mills! Are you helping your mother now?!"

Henry tilted his head to the side and feigned innocence. "Of course I'm helping you Mom."

Regina narrowed her eyes and pursed her lips. "Henry…spill it."

Henry sighed. "Fine. Yes, Ma paid me to help her."

Regina folded her arms and huffed. "Unbelievable. How much?"

"Just 5 dollars." Henry shrugged.

Regina dug in her purse and pulled out a $20 bill. "Here. You're out of the game. Go buy yourself something nice."

Henry grinned and took the money. "Now that's what I'm talking about. Since you're letting me off the hook, I'll let you in on a secret. You're totally winning Ma over. She may be showing off her abs but she's losing her mind over your outfit. Keep it up." Henry said as he gave his brunette mother a high five and headed to look around the store.

Regina smirked and headed back over to Emma. _Breathe Regina. Don't look at her body. Her sexy, toned, body. Shit._

"So I see you've roped our son into this little game." Regina said approaching the blonde.

Emma scoffed. "You did it first. He told me all about your little plan, Regina. Did you really think you could avoid me all day?" Emma stepped forward and whispered into Regina's ear. "Did you really think you could avoid me getting this close to you?" Emma nipped Regina's ear and stepped back when the brunette let out a moan.

Regina's eyes darkened as she looked over the blonde's body. She smirked when she saw some left over ice cream right below Emma's bellybutton. "Oh dear, it looks like you've missed a spot." Regina ran her finger down Emma's stomach causing the blonde to shiver slightly. She then bent down and licked the ice cream off of Emma's stomach. She finished with a kiss and leaned back up to look Emma in the eyes. "Strawberry… yum." Regina said with a lick of her lips, as she walked away, leaving Emma standing there shocked and insanely aroused.

 _Well shit, that backfired._ Emma thought.

* * *

Hours later they were sitting at a restaurant, everyone hungry and tired from the trip and walking around from the day. However, Regina and Emma were not completely focused on food. Their little game had been going back and forth for the past few hours and neither one of them were winning. They were both frustrated with themselves for not being able to beat out the other. They were also sexually frustrated. _Very_ sexually frustrated. They looked at each other from across the table, both their eyes dark with desire, neither of them paying attention to the others at the table who were in deep conversation with the waitress. Emma took this opportunity to speak.

"Regina," Emma whispered as she leaned towards the brunette, "how long do you think you can keep this up? Just admit that you want me. Just give in. Say the words and we can end this."

Regina smirked and leaned in. "Emma, do you really think I would say the words? Do you _really_ think _I_ would give in? Come on darling, you should know me better than that."

Emma's face was taken over by a smug grin. "Oh baby I know you. I know you sooo well, sweetheart. I know that you've wanted me ever since I took my shirt off. I know that when you licked that ice cream off of me, it took everything in you not to trail your tongue down further. I know that your back arched when you saw me licking the cream from that Oreo earlier. I know that your clit has throbbed every time I've looked at you and licked my lips. I know that you want my fingers deep inside you. I know you want my tongue swirling around your clit, my fingers pinching your nipples. Trust me, your Majesty, I know you."

Regina closed her eyes with a long sigh. _Breathe….breathe…don't think about her words….don't think about her fingers…don't think about her tongue…don't think about… Regina, you're the pro here. You make her whine your name. You make her moan. Seduction is YOUR thing. You can win this. Hell, patience is your thing. You spent years planning revenge on Snow White, you can hold out! Let's do this shit!_

"You're absolutely right, dear. All of that is absolutely true." Regina smirked as she sat back looking at the blonde. Regina took off her shoe slowly so that her movements weren't noticeable.

"Yeah, I know I am, Regina. So go ahead and say the words. Say that you give up and we can head back to the hotel and work out all that frustration." Emma said with a smirk.

Regina raised her foot and placed it between Emma's legs. Emma's legs instantly closed and her eyes widened as Regina's foot begin to in circular motions.

"You see, Emma, I think you'll say the words first. Because I know that ever since you saw me in this outfit, _your_ clit has been throbbing. I know your fingers have itched to touch me every time I've bent over. When I licked that ice cream off your stomach, you felt a heat rush through your body. And right now, with my foot rubbing against you, I know for a fact that you're practically dripping. I know you want me to lick your juices up. We're sitting here in the restaurant, a place meant to fulfill one's hunger, but let's be honest baby, you're thing only thing I'm hungry for right now. I want to eat you slowly, savor each taste as you drip into my mouth, and swallow slowly as your juices quench my thirst. So go ahead Emma, say the words, because I'm hungry…and thirsty, and the only thing that's on my menu right now is you." She pulled her foot back and slipped her shoe back on with a smirk.

Emma's breathing had quickened and her eyes were closed. She could feel the wetness between her legs and it wasn't going away anytime soon. _Fight it Swan. Sweet shit, please fight it._ She opened her eyes to see Regina looking at her with a hungry look in her eyes. _Fuck it.I need her now._

Emma promptly stood up, gaining everyone's attention. She pulled out her wallet and laid some money on the table. "Dinner is paid for. Regina and I will eat later. While you're at it, go to a few more stores down the street after you're finished here. If you know what's good for you, you won't go back to the room for at least a few more hours." She grabbed Regina by the hand and headed out of the restaurant before anyone could respond.

* * *

Emma opened the door their room and promptly backed Regina against the wall and kissed her passionately. They had practically sprinted back to the room, neither one of them saying anything on the way. Emma too worked up and Regina far too amused by how frustrated her fiancée was.

Emma picked Regina up and led them to their bedroom, laying them both on the bed. She slowed the kiss and began undressing the brunette.

"You know, Regina, you've been driving me crazy all day," Emma said against Regina's lips. "And now I'm about to drive you just as crazy."

Emma throws each piece of clothing on the floor and continues to roam her hands over the body that she's in love with. She trails kisses and bites up and down Regina's body. Each kiss lingering longer than the last. Each bite and nip more possessive than the last. Each kiss saying "I love you". Each bite saying, "You're mine". Each nip saying "Let me love you". Every one of them drawing a moan from the brunette.

Emma's lips trail up to Regina's left breast, her tongue darting out and swirling around the hard nipple. Regina's back arches as Emma sucks her nipple and slowly rubs the other one.

"Emma, please…please baby" Regina moans out. She doesn't beg. She's a queen and she knows begging is beneath her, but when Emma Swan has been working you up all day, and she's finally on top of you, kissing and biting and sucking every part of your body, you beg. You beg for more and you don't care that you're begging because this shit is worth begging for.

Emma's lips leave the hardened nipple, and she looks at the woman beneath her. Completely breathtaking, completely aroused, completely begging. And she knows Regina doesn't beg. Because Regina is a fucking Queen and she doesn't beg. And as much as she wants to continue to tease Regina, she knows she won't. Because when Regina Fucking Mills is lying beneath you begging for you, you don't play with that shit. You get to work. You show Regina Fucking Mills that you're worth begging for. You give her a look that tells her this is about to be the best night of her life.

Emma leans in and presses a kiss to Regina's lips. Soft and chaste. She trails the kiss down and kisses between wanting thighs. She kisses until she kisses her second pair of favorite lips. The soft kiss draws another moan from Regina's mouth and another, "Please…Em…please." And Emma grins as she sees the wetness in front of her. She breathes in the sweet smell she's been wanting all day. Her tongue trails up and down, licking up the sweet juices and licking everything but Regina's beautiful clit. She circles around the clit, so close to touching it, but never coming in contact with it. She inserts one finger, and then another, gaining a loud moan from her brunette. She slides her fingers in and out slowly; building up for what she knows will be the perfect orgasm.

She slowly increases the pace as her tongue flicks Regina's clit once. The action causes another loud moan and Regina raises her hips immediately wanting the contact back. Emma raises, her lips finding contact with a hardened nipple, and increases her pace, her body rocking with Regina's. As her fingers work diligently, her thumb slowly makes contact with Regina's clit, rubbing slowly and softly, almost a ghost of a touch. Regina wraps her arms around Emma, nails scratching, both moaning in pleasure. They can both feel the intensity as their bodies move together. They've had made love before but this…but is on another level of wanting, of need, of lust, of desire, of passion, of love.

Emma moves back down her favorite body, knowing how close Regina is. Her lips wrap around the wet clit, she sucks and licks, enjoying every moment, every taste. Regina is moaning, screaming her name. Her hands are tangled in blonde hair as Emma works her tongue and her fingers. Emma adds a third finger as she intensifies her suck on Regina's clit. She can feel Regina's walls tightening around her fingers and then Regina is coming completely undone, and Emma loves it when Regina orgasms. Emma slows her fingers and she pulls them out and licks them clean. She wraps her hands around Regina's thighs as she licks up the juices, and she knows it's her face taste, forever her favorite meal. She raises and leans down kissing Regina's lips passionately. Letting the brunette taste how sweet she is, how delicious she is.

Regina opens her eyes as Emma pulls away from the long kiss. She watches as Emma's eyes roam over her both with a deep hunger, and she knows Emma wants more. Hell, she wants more. She wants Emma's tongue back on her, in her, but no, it's her turn now. She wants Emma. She wants to taste the blonde and make her moan and scream. She wants to feel wetness on her tongue. Regina bites her lips as she pulls Emma in for another kiss, and flipping their position in one fluid motion. "I think it's my turn now, don't you think, Em-ma?" she says, her lips hovering over Emma's. "This is about to be a very long night." She says with a smirk as she kisses the blonde again.

 _A very very long night._ Emma thinks as Regina lightly trails her nails up and down Emma's abs. _A very very very long, pleasurable night._


	14. Savoring Life and Family

"That was...different. Not what I was expecting at all." Emma said through labored breaths.

Regina turned her head and frowned, also trying to catch her breath. "What? How? Like bad different or good different? I mean I know it feels different because we're across the town line but-"

Emma shook her head and turned to look at Regina. "No no no good different. Very good different." Seeing the confusion on Regina's face she sat up and continued. "Look Gi, I've experienced sex in a place where magic exists and magic sex is the best. It's like...I don't know. I can't explain it, but theres a difference. When we have sex in Storyebrooke I can feel all of your energy flowing through me. You know what I mean?"

Regina nodded.

"Yeah. But I've also experienced sex before I even knew magic was a thing. Before I stepped foot in Storybrooke, I knew what regular sex was supposed to be. But this? What we just did? No. That was like..." Emma made a big gesture with her hands and Regina shook her head.

"Dear, I don't understand what you're saying. How is it supposed to feel?" Regina asked with furrowed eyebrows.

Emma hopped up and straddled Regina's waist.

"Okay, watch this." Emma leaned down and slowly and passionately kissed Regina, as her hands ran up and down Regina's stomach.

Just as Regina was about to deepen the kiss, Emma pulled back.

"What did you feel?" Emma asked.

"I felt...fear?" Regina asked hestitantly.

Emma nodded with a grin. "Yes! Okay, what about this?" Again Emma leaned down and kissed Regina. When she pulled back Regina was smiling.

"Excitement."

Emma nodded enthusiastically. "Babe our emotions are connected! You felt fear because when I kissed you, I was scared. You felt excitement because when I kissed you-"

"You were excited." Emma nodded. "And...Sex isn't always like that without magic?"

Emma scoffed and shook her head. "I mean it can be emotional, but never have I ever felt something like that. To where I could literally feel how you felt."

"That explains why it was so...intense. So when you kissed me, you could feel how I felt too?

Emma nodded. "Yep. The first time you were worried. Because you felt my fear. The second time you felt all...giggly. Because I was excited."

Regina scoffed. "Please, Miss Swan, I do not giggle." Regina said with a sniff.

Emma rolled her eyes. "You do realize we're getting married, right? You do understand that I've literally seen you giggle? On multiple occasions? There's no hiding this from me. You're a giggler."

"I do not giggle. I laugh in a lightly manner." Regina said, folding her arms.

"Yeah, okay sweet cheeks, that's called giggling. Just admit that you giggle. It's okay."

Regina flipped their positions and quickly began tickling Emma. "Oh look who's giggling now!"

"Gi..st-ahhhh- Stop! Okay okay! St-ahhhh Okay!" Emma yelled through uncontrollable laughter.

Regina finally stopped with a satisfied smirk on her face.

"You play so dirty. Ya know that?" Emma said as she tried to catch her breath.

"So I've been told." Regina leaned down and kissed the blonde on the nose.

Emma smiled. "Soooo...ready for round four, Madame Mayor?"

Regina smirked. "Let's get started, Sheriff."

* * *

"Oh look who it is. The loud lovebirds. Loud. Very loud. I don't know if you two forgot that we were here last night, but I would like it if you would remember next time. I am scarred for life." Henry said with a look horror.

Regina and Emma had just walked out of the bedroom after getting out of the shower and getting dressed. David, Snow, and Henry were sitting at the breakfast bar eating and looking at the two women as if they had done something wrong.

Emma shrugged. "I don't know what you're talking about." She said as she headed to the kitchen to make some coffee.

Regina, however, at least had the decency to look guilty. "I'm sorry Henry, it won't happen again." She said as she gave him a kiss on the cheek and patted his head.

"Regina what the hell?! You just gave us away. Now they know it was us! And like hell it's not happening again! Grow up kid, sex is a beautiful thing!"

Regina shook her head. "I'm pretty sure they already knew it was us, dear."

"Yes, we know it was you Emma." Snow said with a disapproving look. "And while sex is a beautiful thing, what we heard last night was...it just didn't sound safe Emma!"

"Look, the last thing I want to do is talk about my daughter's sex life." David said with a grimace.

"I agree. I do not wish to discuss my sex life with you three. So, what are the plans for today?" Regina asked, swiftly changing the subject as she took a bite of Henry's bacon.

"Well we figured we could spend the day at the beach. How does that sound to the two of you?" Henry offered.

Emma and Regina nodded.

"Yeah kid that sounds good. Don't plan anything for the next three days though. I've made plans for all of us." Emma stated as she spread butter on a bagel.

Silence filled the room, making Emma look up at her family who were all wearing unsure expressions.

Emma rolled her eyes and sighed. "Ah come on guys, when has my planning ever let you down before?"

Henry was about to answer when Emma put her hand up. "Don't answer that. Look, I've planned this out perfectly, okay? Just have a little faith in me will ya?"

"Oh of course we have faith in you Emma! Right guys?" Snow offered.

Mumbles of "yeah" and "sure" were passed around causing Emma to roll her eyes.

"Whatever. You guys are gonna be sorry you ever doubted me." Emma mumbled as she took a bite of her toast. "Let's get dressed for the beach." She added with a mouth full of food.

The rest agreed and headed to go get changed, as Regina and Emma remained in the kitchen.

Regina turned to the blonde and narrowed her eyes. "What exactly do you have planned? Surf lessons? Boat rides?"

Emma smirked and shook her head. "Wouldn't you like to know. You're gonna be so impressed with my planning skills, you'll probably jump my bones right then and there."

Regina raised an eyebrow. "Are you suggesting that your planning will...arouse me?"

"Oh please Regina, we all know that structure is a kink for you. You probably get wet just from organizing files." Emma said with a smug grin.

Regina laughed and shook her head as she walked towards the bedroom with her coffee. "That is absolutely absurd, Miss Swan."

"Yeah, we'll see." Emma mumbled as she followed after the brunette, while chewing on her bagel. "Hey where did this food come from?! I'm not paying for room service!"

* * *

The weather outside was beyond perfect. Classic spring break weather. Not too hot and not too cold. David and Snow were taking a walk along the beach, David in his blue swim trunks and Snow in her matching blue shorts and white spaghetti strap shirt, leaving Henry, Regina, and Emma to their own devices.

"Henry have you put on sunscreen?"

Henry rolled his eyes as he made eye contact with his blonde mother who was poorly attempting to hold in a laugh.

"Mom, you've literally asked me that four times already. Yes! I've put it on."

"Well excuse me for trying to make sure you don't burn." Regina said as she leaned forward to attempt to put more sunscreen on the boy.

Henry quickly moved away with a groan. "Mom you're embarrassing me! Ma tell her to stop!"

"Eh I don't know Hen, looks like you need a little more behind your ears." Emma added with a laugh.

Henry quickly backed away before his brunette mother could add anymore sunscreen to his body. "No no no, we're done here. I'll be in the water." He said taking off down the beach.

Regina shook her head with a smile and looked down at her hands which were coated with sunscreen. "Well now what am I supposed to with all of this?" She asked the blonde with a raised eyebrow.

"Well...I already put sunscreen on, but I wouldn't mind having a gorgeous woman put some on my back. I mean, if I have to suffer through it." Emma exasperated.

"Oh hush and get over here." Regina said as she rolled her eyes.

Emma slid between Regina's legs and closed her eyes as she focused on the feel of the slim fingers that went up and down her back. Regina's hands had become one of Emma's favorite things, not because of sexual reasons though. Regina's touch was gentle, kind, and loving. Holding Regina's hand felt like home. Feeling the woman rub small circles on her back or feeling Regina's fingers run through her hair, made Emma feel loved. Not to mention that the brunette had the softest and prettiest hands that Emma had ever felt or seen. But then again, Regina was the softest and prettiest person that Emma had ever felt or seen. _How'd I get so lucky?_

"I'm so glad we decided to take this vacation." Regina said, breaking the silence.

Emma hummed in agreement. "Yeah we definitely needed it. It's like we haven't been really busy but at the same time I feel like we've been working nonstop. You at the office and me at the station. Both of us doing wedding planning. It's been a little chaotic."

"Indeed. I feel as though I haven't really seen you or Henry in forever. We have dinner together sometimes but even that has become rare. We're at work and Henry's at school. He's hanging out with his friends and we're doing wedding planning. We arrive home at different times and by then everyone is too exhausted to watch a movie or play a board game or just talk about our days. It just...feels like everything is slipping away too quickly." Regina said with a sigh.

"Hey hey hey, everything's not slipping away." Emma said as she turned fully to face Regina. "Baby, look at me. We have our whole lives together, okay? You, me, the kid, our future kids. We have nothing but time and if you think it's slipping away too fast, then we'll slow everything down. I would wait a lifetime to marry you Regina, so we don't have to rush it. Henry's growing up, that's inevitable, but we can always make more time with him. And work...well the town seems to fall apart without us but we can arrange for more weekends off and move some things around. How does that sound?" Emma asked softly.

Regina smiled, wiping away the few tears that had escaped without her permission, and nodded. "Thank you, Emma. I just...sometimes things seem like they're moving too fast for me, and i just want everything to stop. It becomes...overwhelming, and it begins to feel like I'm out of control and everything is slipping from my grasp."

Silence reigned between them as Emma digested Regina's words.

"Can I tell you something?" Emma asked.

Regina nodded.

"Growing up in the system is like, ya know...sucky. And it is extremely rare that you'll run into a good thing. There are two types of people in the system: those who savor and those who cram. Now savors, they savor every little thing. They eat their food slowly and they lay in the bed a little longer, because they never know how long this family will keep them. They never know if this meal will be their last decent one or how soon it will be before they're back in a crappy bed, so they savor it. They don't care about anything else. They're not in a rush, they just want to enjoy every little moment."

"And then there are those who cram. They stuff a lot of activites into what they assume will be a short amount of time. So instead of savoring their food, they eat it quickly so they can get seconds. Instead of laying in the bed a little longer, they decorate the room with posters of their favorite bands or something. They initiate family game nights and play with the kids in the neighborhood. Crammers try to do a lot in what they think is a small amount of time."

"Because they want the family experience before they're sent away again. They want to get all they can while they're there." Regina stated.

Emma nodded. "Exactly. Well, I was...am a "crammer", Regina. That's the way I learned to live life. If a good thing comes my way, I snatch it up and run with it. I dont savor shit because in my mind, in my world, good things dont last forever. But when Henry brought me to Storybrooke, and I realized i wanted to stay in his life, I began to savor things. Any moment with him, I would savor it. I became a mix of the two. I would still try to cram a lot into our time we had together, but I would also try to savor it."

"Well, I'm still like that Regina, especially with you. I want to savor every little moment that we have. Every little bitty moment. But I also want to take the moments I have with you and do everything as fast as possible because-"

"Because you still think it's only a matter of time before I decide I don't want you anymore" Regina finished in a whisper.

Emma nodded. "I'm working on it. I promise I am. And I trust you, more than anyone, but you know...old habits. But my point is, I know that neither one of us grew up with healthy families or relationships, so I know this is new to both of us. So I want us to enjoy this. Us. Finally having something that's good and healthy and happy. I don't want to rush through anything, any moment. I don't want to wake up one morning when we're old and not remember a moment that I had with my family, with you, with Hen. I want to savor every little moment. So promise me that if you ever see me cramming moments or activites or hell, anything, I want you to stop me. Tell me to slow down. To take a deep breath. Tell me to savor the moment. Don't be afraid to tell me how you feel. If you need to stop and breathe, I want to stop and breathe with you. For the first time in my life, the last thing I want to do is cram. I want to savor this, even if it ends tomorrow."

Regina leaned forward placing a soft, passionate kiss on pink lips. "I promise." She whispered as she rested her forehead on Emma's. "And thank you for sharing with me and trusting me. I know we're still learning things about each other and whether they be colossal things or simple things, I become more and more grateful for everything I learn about you."

Emma hummed in agreement and pulled back, looking fully at the brunette. "Feeling better?"

Regina nodded with a grin.

Emma smiled and jumped up, pulling Regina with her. "Alright then, let's go capture life by the balls and savor that shit!"

Regina gave a disapproving look and shook her head as they began walking down the beach. "Your catchphrases are completely..."

"Awesome? Incredible? Inspiring? Encouraging?" Emma offered.

"Tasteless."

Emma stopped and gasped dramatically. "Take that back."

Regina raised a perfectly sculpted eyebrow at the blonde. "Or what? You'll punish me?"

A smirk slowly crept over Emma's face as she began walking towards the mayor. "Yep." She said, as she came face to face with the brunette.

Before Regina could respond, Emma picked her up, slung her over her shoulder, and started walking towards the water.

"Emma! Emma no!" Regina yelped.

Emma laughed as she continued towards the water. "Tell me my catchphrases aren't tasteless!"

Regina scoffed. "As if!"

"Say it or you're gonna get dunked!" Emma exclaimed as she got knee deep in the water.

"Miss Swan, if you think you can-AHHHH" Before Regina could finish her sentence Emma successfully dunked the brunette in the cool water.

Regina came up from the water to see Emma curled over in uncontrollable laughter. Lost in her laughter, Emma didn't see the brunette coming up behind her, which gave Regina the perfect opportunity to tackle the blonde in the water as a small wave came.

Emma came up from the water with a fierce glare that may have been intimidating if she wasn't poorly holding back a smile.

"Regina Francesca Mills!" Emma yelled as she began chasing the brunette in the water.

"THAT IS NOT MY MIDDLE NAME!"

* * *

"Are we there yet Ma?" Henry sighed.

Emma made a show of looking out of the windshield as she drove. "Hmm, we're still moving so no I don't think so."

"Sweetheart, if you're lost we won't get mad or make fun of you. We can stop and ask for directions." Snow offered timidly.

Emma rolled her eyes and sighed. They had woken up at about 4am to pack their bags in the car and get on the road. Emma wasn't surprised at the questions that followed once she told them they were moving to a different resort. "Did you forget to pay for the other days?" "Did you accidentally book the wrong amount of days?" "Where will we sleep?" "Are you sure you have a plan? Because this seems sketchy." Emma shook her head. _Oh ye of little faith._

"For your information, I am not lost. We're about an hour away so keep your panties on."

Henry yawned and leaned his seat back. "Well wake me up when we get there. I'm gonna take a power nap."

Emma hummed in acknowledgment. David and Regina had been asleep the entire time, Henry slept for about 2 hours and then woke up to snack on some fruit. Snow had been up the entire time.

"I guess I should call Belle and see how things are going with Neal. I really miss him." Snow said, pulling out her phone.

"Um, it's pretty early. Maybe you want to call a little later? Handling Neal is quite the task so I'm sure Belle needs as much rest as possible." Emma offered.

Snow nodded. "I suppose you're right." Snow leaned forward, propping her elbows on her knees. "So...you and Regina huh?"

Emma's face scrunched up. "Um...yeah?"

Snow nodded, looking deep in thought. "And how is that going?"

"Uh...good?" Emma answered.

"Let's play a game!" Snow suggested, clapping her hands together.

Emma shrugged. _Don't have anything else better to do._ "What kind of game?"

"Kind of like a spouse game. We'll ask different questions having to do with our significant others! I'll go first: What's your favorite item of clothing that Regina owns?"

Emma smiled widely, not having to think about her answer for long. "She has this black leather skirt that she wears with her black leather jacket and it just...she looks so badass in it. That outfit is by far my favorite."

"Ah I know which one you're talking about. Good choice." Snow said.

"Oh wait! Actually I think there may be another outfit that is superior. She has this black, v-neck dress that shows just enough cleavage, and it has blue sleeves and a button collar thingy that goes around her neck. It's like...super sexy and it fits her body so perfectly."

"Oh I think I know which one yo-"

"Actually no, wait. She has this red dress tha-"

"Okay okay! I get it. You love everything that Regina wears. I don't even know why I asked that question. It's Regina for crying out loud." Snow grumbled. "Now ask me a question."

"Yeah, I'm glad you stopped me cause I could have gone on forever. But anyway, um what's something that dad does that gets on your nerves? Like really, really just gets under your skin." Emma questioned.

Snow rolled her eyes and groaned. "Your father's horrible television habits. You know what I'm talking about!"

Emma's face lit up with recognition. "Dude! When we're all sitting down watching something and then all of a sudden he changes the channel! Just flipping through as if no one else is there! I thought I was the only one who hated that!"

Snow shook her head. "I hate it with a passion, Emma. If there's anything that will send me on a dark path, it'll be that."

Emma chuckled.

"Okay, so same question, but with Regina. What's something that she does that really gets under your skin?" Snow asked with a raised eyebrow.

Emma tilted her head in thought. She had learned a lot about Regina since they had gotten together, and while she loved the small brunette, she had quite the list of things that Regina did that she deemed unnecessary or irritating.

"Ah okay, now this is something that she does all of the time. She'll say, "Hey could you do this or do that some time today?" and of course I'm like, "Yeah sure babe", but if I don't do it at that very second, she'll get up and just do it herself. And it is extremely irritating. Like if you want me to do it right then, then you have to say so, otherwise I'll just do it later. Ya know?" Emma ranted, as she made eye contact with her mother in the rear view mirror.

Snow avoided her daughter's eyes and shifted in her seat. "But if she asks you to do it, then isn't it kind of obvious that she wants it done at that time?"

Emma narrowed her eyes and looked at her mother. "No, it's not obvious. Are...are you taking her side on this?!"

Snow shrugged. "I'm sorry Emma but you are just like your father sometimes. I ask him to do something and it takes him forever to do it. I just don't understand."

Emma sputtered and shook her head. "I- I am not like him!"

"But you are dear." Regina said, entering the conversation unexpectedly. Her voice was sleepy and groggy as she shifted in her seat, her eyes still closed.

Emma turned, looking at the mayor with a shocked expression. "Re-Regina, how long have you been listening?"

Regina peeked an eye open, raising her eyebrow. "Just long enough to hear you complain about me, and long enough to agree that, yes dear, you are indeed like your father."

Emma scoffed. "I wasn't complaining, I was just saying. And I am NOT like my dad. He's all...ya know..."

Regina rolled her eyes and sat up straight. "Snow wake up your Prince so we can settle this."

"David, wake up!" Snow said, hitting David on the shoulder.

"No kiss…hmph I'm shocked." Regina muttered, earning a laugh from Emma and a glare from Snow.

"What's the matter?" David asked, rubbing his eyes as if he was a toddler.

"What's something that I do that really gets under your skin?" Snow asked.

David looked around at the three women looking at him, then back at Snow. "Is this a trap?"

Regina rolled her eyes. "Just answer the question, Charming."

David took some time to think and snapped his fingers when he had his answer.

"Okay, so no offense honey, but she does this thing where she'll ask me to do something, like fix the lock on a door, and if I don't do it at that exact moment then I'll find her trying to do it herself. And I'll ask, "Sweetheart, what are you doing?" And she goes, "Well it didn't seem like you were gonna do it, so I figured I'd just do it." But I'm like, you asked me to do it five minutes ago!" David finished with an irritated huff.

Both Regina and Snow immediately turned to Emma wearing smug faces.

"That doesn't prove anything! It's a valid point okay? If you want us to do it at a specific time, then why don't you just tell us to?!" Emma argued.

Snow shook her head. "You're adults, we shouldn't have to tell you to!"

"Exactly. Why would we ask you to do it and then be okay with it being done hours later? That doesn't make any sense." Regina added.

"But it also doesn't make any sense to not be specific on when you want it done." David countered.

"My point exactly." Emma said, giving her father an approving nod.

Regina frowned and crossed her arms, turning her attention to Snow. "Last Saturday I asked your daughter to put together the new bookshelf in my office at home. I asked her to do such at about 1pm. She didn't begin putting it together until 11pm." Regina finished, directing her last sentence towards Emma.

"Emma Swan! This is completely unacceptable!" Snow scolded in disbelief as she hit Emma's shoulder, causing Regina to cast a satisfied smirk towards her fiancé.

"Hey, no hitting while I drive! Look, you said do it. I did. You didn't give me a time frame. You just said you wanted it done by the end of the day and I got it done, so I don't see the problem." Emma countered.

"Yeah she got it done so what's the big deal?" David added.

Regina and Snow looked at each other and simply shook their heads, both silently agreeing that there was no use in arguing about it anymore.

"What brought this up in the first place?" David asked.

"I suggested we play a game so we were asking different questions that revolved around our relationships." Snow answered.

"Speaking of...Dad, why is it that when we're all watching TV, you randomly change the channel?" Emma asked.

David looked at the three women with confusion written across his face. "Wait what? I don't do that!"

Silence.

"Do I?"

"You do."

"All the time."

"I hate watching television with you."

David sat with his mouth agape. "W-well maybe it's because all you guys watch is trash. Snow all you watch is those home remodeling shows, Regina I don't even know what you watch, and Emma all you want to do is keep up with the Kardashians!"

"W-what?! They're funny!" Emma defended.

"No dear, that's trash." Regina stated.

"Yeah Emma. Not good television at all." Snow added.

"Yeah, well Dad all you ever watch is sports and bad movies. And it's not even the good sports, it's golfing and bowling! I didn't even know they showed bowling on TV! The other day I walked in on him watching the Bee Movie!" Emma announced.

Regina cringed. "My God, Charming that movie is horrible."

"Awww I like that one! It's cute!" Snow said with a smile.

Both Emma and Regina groaned. "SHE LEFT HER FIANCÉ FOR A BEE!"

Snow rolled her eyes. "Yeah yeah yeah, let's get back to the game. We've got two new players so let's continue!" She said excitedly.

"I never agreed to-"

"Oh hush Regina, you're playing. Now here's a question: If you had to be with anyone else in Storybrooke who would you be with?" Snow asked, ignored Regina's glare.

The car went silent as everyone took their time thinking about their answers. 5 minutes passed before Snow spoke up.

"Everyone have their answers?" They nodded. "Okay let's all say them on three. One...two...three!"

"Ruby"

"Belleficent"

"Tink"

"Fredrick"

Silence came over the car once again as everyone took in each other's answer.

"Belleficent? What the hell is that?" Regina asked, causing everyone to turn and look at Emma.

Emma lifted her hands in surrender. "You're a unique lady Regina! I kept trying to think of someone who could closely compare to you but I couldn't think of one. Hence, Belle and Maleficent. Belleficent."

"That's oddly...sweet dear." Regina said, leaning over giving her fiancé a kiss on the cheek.

Emma grinned but her grin quickly faded and her eyebrows furrowed as she thought of Regina's answer. "Wait a minute, you'd choose Ruby? Why?"

Regina shrugged. "The two of you have similar qualities. Both of you are outspoken, have poor manners, and are insanely childish sometimes. Not to mention she's one of your best friends. If she's good enough for you then she's good enough for me."

"I take that as a compliment and I'm sure Ruby will be flattered." Emma said with a grin.

Regina rolled her eyes, turning her attention to David. "So Tink huh? Got some type of fairy dust kink there, Charming?" Regina asked with a smirk.

Charming rolled his eyes. "I just think she's a nice woman. She reminds me a lot of Snow. Super nice, but also hardcore when she needs to be."

"Hmph, I don't see it." Emma scoffed.

"That's just because you're jealous." Regina said, rolling her eyes.

"I'm not jealous. I have no reason to be. I just don't understand what you saw in her." Emma said with a nonchalant shrug.

"Emma, we kissed once, decades ago. We were never even a thing."

"Wait, you dated Tink?!" Henry piped up.

Everyone turned and looked at Henry, who was wide awake and very attentive. "How long have you been awake?!" Regina asked.

"Long enough to agree that the Bee Movie is absolutely ridiculous. And long enough to wonder why Grams said she would be with Freddie. I've never even seen you two talk Grams." Henry said, causing everyone to turn their attention to Snow.

Snow shrugged. "He's cute."

"Oh my god..."

"It's not that big of a deal, Regina. I jus-"

"OH MY GOD!"

"Henry, honestly I don't think it's that big of a -"

"SNOW LOOK!" David exclaimed as he pointed out of the window.

Snow leaned forward and she let out a gleeful scream.

"Welcome to Disney World everybody!"

* * *

"I CANNOT BELIEVE THAT YOU THREE GOT US KICKED OUT OF DISNEY WORLD!" Henry yelled as he buckled his seatbelt.

Emma, Regina, and David sat in the backseat, all three of them with their arms folded and frowns on their faces.

"HOW?! HOW?! PLEASE TELL ME HOW THE THREE OF YOU MANAGED TO GET KICKED OUT OF THE HAPPIEST PLACE ON EARTH!" Snow shouted as she started the car.

David sighed and his shoulders sagged.

"Well..."


	15. Sticky Wilson and the Gang

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How could you possibly get kicked out of Disney World?

_Emma and David stood next to the concession stand across from the teacup ride. They had been standing there for almost 20 minutes which is why David rolled his eyes as Emma checked her phone for the 15th time._

_"Emma, is this guy even coming?"_

_Emma rolled her eyes at her father. "Yes Dad. He said to meet him here and he'd be here momentarily. Have some patience."_

_David nodded. "Okay okay, I'm just excited! I've never done the weed before!"_

_Emma shushed her dad and looked around frantically. "Would you quiet down?! Jesus. First of all, calm down, it's not that big of a deal. Secondly, it's not "the weed" it's just weed. And thirdly, you don't "do" weed. You can smoke it or eat it, but you don't "do" it."_

_David nodded as he attempted to look casual. "Yeah yeah I know. I've heard of the green grass. I know what to do with it."_

_Emma looked at David with an unconvinced stare. "Green grass?"_

_David rolled his eyes at his daughter. "Yeah Emma. The green grass. The smushed grapes. The sweet jalapenos. The plant gravy. The shredded garden. The oo-wee."_

_Before Emma could address her father's nonsense, she heard a familiar voice._

_"What on earth is "the oo-wee"?"_

_Emma and David turned around to see Regina wearing a Mickey Mouse hat and a blue Elsa cape with an ice cream cone in her hand. If they hadn't been caught waiting for drugs, Emma would have laughed at how adorably cute the brunette looked._

_"O-oh hey Gina. W-what's up? You look cute babe." Emma said, attempting to sound normal._

_"Y-Yeah, what's up, Gina? Having a good time? Us too. We're just standing here. Not waiting for anyone or anything."_

_Emma face-palmed as she shook her head. Dang it, Dad._

_Regina raised her eyebrow at the two. "So, what and who are you two waiting for?"_

_Emma shook her head. "Regina, I don't think you really wanna know the ans-"_

_"Emma!"_

_Their heads whipped around to see a huge muscular guy grinning at the blonde. He was wearing a tight, white t-shirt, with blue jeans, flip-flops, and a beanie. His arms were covered in tattoos and he looked absolutely terrifying._

_"Jonah!" Emma jumped in the guy's arms and he picked her up, twirling her around with ease._

_"How have you been?! Still jumping fences and telling authority to suck it?" Jonah asked as he finally sat Emma down._

_Emma laughed and playfully punched the man. "Dude that was one time! Let it go! But actually, I am the authority now. I'm a Sheriff." She said with a smug grin._

_Jonah stared at Emma for a second before hunching over in uncontrollable laughter. "Y-you...a...a sheriff...that's...i-i can't-"_

_Emma rolled her eyes playfully. "Dude stop laughing! I'm serious!"_

_Jonah finally stopped laughing and looked at the blonde incredulously. "Wait really?!"_

_Emma nodded with cockily. "Yup. I should arrest you for indecent exposure. That shirt is embarrassingly tight man! I can see your nipples."_

_Jonah scoffed. "Indecent exposure. Look who learned some big words. This shirt shows off my sweet bod." Jonah dramatically flexed his muscles and grunted._

_Emma shook her head at his antics. "Sweet bod? Jesus, you're still such a nerd! I did not raise you to be like this!"_

_Jonah frowned and pointed at the blonde. "I'm older than you!"_

_"Semantics." Emma said, waving him off._

_Jonah rolled his eyes but let the comment slide. "So, are you gonna introduce me?"_

_Emma smiled she slid her arm around Regina's waist. "Yeah yeah of course! Jonah, this is my beautiful fiancée Regina Lauren Mills-"_

_"Not my middle name."_

_"- and I'm David, just a friend." David finished, as he shook the man's hand._

_Emma chuckled and shook her head. "Don't worry Dad, Jonah knows everything. He's basically my big brother."_

_"Don't worry man, I'd never spill her secrets." Jonah said with a wink. He then turned his attention to the women in front of them. He looked between Regina and Emma several times, before landing on Regina. "You're marrying Sticky Wilson over here?" He asked, motioning to Emma._

_Regina raised an eyebrow and looked at Emma. "Sticky Wilson?"_

_Jonah chuckled. "You haven't told her about Sticky Wilson?"_

_Emma buried her face in her hands. "Please let that go."_

_Regina smirked as she looked back at Jonah. "I'll get her to tell me later. So how do you two know each other?"_

_"We met in one of the homes. Emma was 10 and I was just turning 16. Like she said, we're practically siblings."_

_"Yeah, but I'm cooler." Emma said with a grin._

_"And delusional." Jonah added._

_"And you're the person they were waiting on?" Regina questioned with suspicion._

_Jonah snapped his fingers and pulled his backpack off. "Yeah yeah, thanks for reminding me! Okay Em, so I brought you my specialty! These are guaranteed to-"_

_Jonah stopped mid-sentence as he saw Emma furiously shaking her head as she stood behind Regina with a panicked, pleading look on her face. A slow grin spread across Jonah's face and Emma knew she was screwed._

_"Oh Emma, don't tell me you didn't tell your soon-to-be wife why I was here."_

_"I-I uh-"_

_"No, Jonah she didn't tell me the purpose of your visit." Regina said, throwing a questioning look at Emma. Jonah pulled out a large zip-lock bag and handed it to Regina. She inspected the bag and raised an eyebrow. "Brownies? This is what you're here for? To feed her endless gut?"_

_"Hey!"_

_"These here are my_ _**special** _ _brownies." Jonah said, wiggling his eyebrows._

_Regina opened the bag and took out a piece of a brownie. "Emma I could have made you brownies if you wanted them this bad." She said, inspecting the chocolate treat. She sniffed it and frowned lightly. "These smell...herbal..."_

_"Regina don't eat that!" Emma warned, but it was too late. Regina had already taken a bite of the treat._

_They watched as the brunette slowly finished chewing and spun to look at her fiancée._

_"Miss. Swan."_

_Emma winced at the tone and name Regina used._

_"I can excuse a lot of things, but the fact that you would have eaten all of these brownies without sharing with me is inexcusable!"_

_Emma blinked rapidly, her jaw slack. "I-I..."_

_"Regina, you know those are_ _**weed** _ _brownies right?" Charming whispered._

_Regina rolled her eyes. "Of course I know that peabrain. I knew it as soon as I bit into it. What I don't know is why my soon-to-be wife, would keep all of the goodies to herself!" Regina said, taking another bite of the brownie._

_Emma's eyes widened as three sets of eyes looked at her. "Regina! I didn't even know you knew what weed was! I for sure thought that you would have been pissed if you found out. Plus you're a queen and queens don't do that kind of stuff right?"_

_"Oh sweetheart, there's a reason that "Evil" is a part of my description. But let's clarify something shall we? You thought that I would be upset with your actions, yet you still decided to go through with it. Is that correct?" Regina asked, biting into another brownie and fixing Emma with a blank stare._

_Emma scratched the back of her neck and nodded weakly. "Are you mad?"_

_Regina walked forward and gently kissed the top of Emma's nose. "No Emma, I'm not mad. But we_ _**will** _ _talk about this later. However, for now let's finish these brownies and go ride the teacups." She said, as she fed a brownie to the blonde._

_"The teacups? Why the teacups?" David asked, reaching for a brownie._

_Regina rolled her eyes and looked at her soon to be father-in-law. "The teacups would logically be one of the best rides to take on if you're high. When you're sober it's completely useless, but when you're high? Well I'd bet everything that it's like being in another reality."_

_"How do you know that?" Emma asked with a mouth full of brownie._

_"Not my first rodeo, sweetheart. Any roller coaster or ride is better when you're high. However, since you're spinning in circles on the teacups, you get better results." Regina shrugged as if it was obvious._

_Jonah let out a whistle, watching as the brunette woman grab her fifth brownie and delicately devoured it. "Man Wilson, you got a good one."_

_Emma smiled and shook her head. "Yeah, don't deserve her though."_

_Regina leaned forward and gently kissed Emma on the lips. "Yes you do."_

_"Are they always like this?" Jonah whispered to David._

_David nodded vigorously. "Always. They make me and Snow look like we're just playing house. Sometimes I forget that they're not already married."_

_Jonah nodded, as he reached into the bag of goodies and watched the two women feed each other brownies and whisper to each other. "I gotta start treating my lady better. They make me feel like I'm not doing enough."_

_David shook his head and chuckled. "They have a way of making everyone feel like that. It's actually kind of annoying sometimes but let's be honest, I'm happy for them. They've both had hard lives and I'm really glad they found each other. They deserve this happiness and so much more."_

_Jonah nodded as he watched the two women. "So it would do no good to give Regina the "if you hurt her" speech huh?"_

_David laughed and shook his head. "No good at all my man. I tried to give her that speech and somehow I'm the one that left the conversation crying."_

_Standing up, Jonah laughed and cracked his knuckles. "Well, no offense, but I think I'm a little more intimidating than you, David. I think I can get the point across."_

_David grunted in amusement. "My money is on Regina every time man, but go ahead."_

_Jonah made his way over to the women and cleared his throat, causing them to turn around._

_"Hey Jo, what's up?" Emma asked with a smile._

_"I was wondering if I could have a word with your fiancée here. If you don't mind of course." Jonah asked, making eye contact with the brunette._

_Emma narrowed her eyes suspiciously. "Uh..."_

_Regina rolled her eyes and patted Emma's arm in reassurance. "It's fine Em. Go handle your father who seems very interested in his hand right now."_

_As Emma walked away, Regina turned to Jonah with a smile. "You're here to give me "the talk" aren't you?"_

_Jonah raised an eyebrow, slightly taken aback that Regina knew his intentions._

_Regina caught the look of surprise on Jonah's face and chuckled. "Please don't insult my intelligence, Jonah. You're standing taller and in a power stance that screams "I'm not here to fuck around". I know the look. So go ahead and do your worst. I'm listening."_

_Jonah hummed. "You are as smart as she says you are. Which means you're smart enough to know just how great Emma is. Hell you're marrying her! You know how smart and kind and funny and brave, so amazingly brave, she is. You know she's tough as nails but-"_

_"But she is as fragile as a flower petal." Regina interrupts._

_Jonah nods. "See? Smart. Which means you're smart enough to know that I mean it when I say if you hurt her, I will hunt you down. I will-"_

_"Make my life a living hell, kill me and enjoy every second of it. Blah blah blah. Yes I've heard it all before." Regina said, rolling her eyes. "But let me make something perfectly clear, Jonah." Regina said, fixing him with a serious look. "Hurting Emma equates to hurting myself. She is everything a person should aspire to be and more. Her bravery and courage and her pure willingness to help and her sense of humor and her laugh and her sensitivity and her fierceness and her loyalty, is truly magnificent. When I say I don't deserve her, I mean it. I don't love her with my heart, I love that woman with my soul, with all that I am. She is the thing that keeps me smiling on the worst of days and even when I thought I hated her, I just hated not having her. Not being near her. So believe me when I say that the day I hurt Emma, the day I break her heart, is the day I hurt and break not only my own heart, but my soul."_

_Jonah pulled Regina in and hugged her tightly. "That was the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Anyone that talks about Wilson like that deserves every part of her." Jonah said, attempting to swallow his sob._

" _Everything okay over here?" Emma asked hesitantly as her and David approached._

_Jonah and Regina pulled back, Jonah wiping his face and Regina pulling Emma in for a kiss. "We were just talking about how amazing you are and how much I love you."_

_David groaned as he shoved them apart. "Enough of the mush fest! Let's finish off these brownies and take this place by storm!" He yelled as he thrusted his fist in the air and took off towards the line to the teacups._

" _Your father is a lightweight." Jonah offered with a chuckle, Regina and Emma joining in, nodding their heads in agreement._

* * *

**_30 Minutes Later_ **

" _Okay but do you think it's called "sand" because it's between the sea and land?" Emma asked as she slowly slid into their chosen teacup._

" _Ohhh, bro that's so smarrrt! Wilson you're a genius." Jonah said as he slid over to make room for David._

" _But no no no no. Because sand is at deserts and there isn't a sea at the desert so that can't be the reason." Regina replied scrunching up her nose, causing Emma to start giggling._

" _You look like a bunny." Emma whispered as she slowly poked Regina's nose, causing the brunette to giggle as well._

" _Wait, I have a real question! Where does food come from?" David asked, shock and confusion written all over his face._

_Jonah frowned and shook his head. "We make it. Duhhhh!"_

" _No, I know that but_ _ **where does it come from**_ _? How do we get bread? Who is making it and how do they put it in a pizza? WHERE DOES IT COME FROM? WHAT IF WE RUN OUT?!" David exclaimed in a panic._

" _Oh my kinkies, he's right. What if we run out? What happens then?" Jonah asked, fear rising in his voice._

_The sound of sobbing grabbed their attention and they looked to the right to see Emma sobbing uncontrollably. Regina, who had been staring into space, instantly pulled Emma closer. "Oh no, baby what's wrong?"_

" _J-Jonah and D-Dad said th-that that that tha-"_

" _That what? What'd you say?" Regina asked, addressing the men._

" _They said that f-food would be g-gone a-and that t-the world would run of, (hiccup) of, (hiccup), of, (hiccup)-"_

" _OF WHAT?!" Regina exclaimed impatiently._

" _PIZZAAAAAAA." Emma sobbed hysterically._

_Regina looked at the men with wild eyes. "Why the hell would you say that?!"_

" _Because Regina! Where does food even come from? Who's making it? What if we run out of it?!' David explained in panic again._

" _The grocery stores will just order more. That's what they're there for. Or the farmers will farm some more!" Regina said, trying to calm them down._

" _BUT WHERE DO THE FARMERS GET THE FOOD TO FARM THE FARM?!" David yelled._

_Silence._

" _Oh. You're right. We'll have to store up food for the future. Luckily we're the only ones smart enough to think about this so we have an advantage."_

_Emma nodded furiously as she wiped her face. "Yeah yeah. Gerina is right. We're surrounded by food. We can buy backpacks and load up for centuries to come!" She said high fiving the group and fist pumping aggressively._

" _Um, excuse me. The ride is over and you guys have to get off now."_

_The four adults looked up to see that the ride, in fact, was already over. Although they didn't even notice that it had started. The ride attendant was looking at them expectedly._

" _Yes well, we shall be leaving now." Regina said as they stood up to get out._

" _And I know you don't get tips often so here, buy yourself something nice." David said as they stepped out, handing the boy what he thought was a five dollar bill, but was actually just a Ziploc bag._

* * *

" _Stop right there! Ma'am! MA'AM!"_

_Emma and Regina took off running, dipping and dodging the other park guests as they ran towards the meeting spot they'd agreed to meet David and Jonah at. Taking a sharp right and another sly left they lost the officer._

" _Whew, that was a close one!" Regina said, catching her breath._

_Emma nodded but then grinned. "Yeah but look at all the stuff we got! We're gonna eat like gods for the next forty centuries!" She said as she opened up the backpack to admire their hard work._

" _HA! More like forty-one centuries! I got two more turkey legs!" Regina exclaimed, as she waved the large turkey legs around and proceeded to do the robot with them._

" _You look so sexy right now. I can't believe I'm marrying a dancing queen!"_

" _Emma! Regina!"_

_Emma and Regina turned to see Jonah and David army crawling their way towards them. The two women bent down and tip-toed over to meet the men half-way._

" _Hey, you guys got the stuff?" Regina asked, looking around to make sure they weren't being watched._

" _Did we get the stuff? Pfft! don't insult us. Twenty chicken wings, a hundred and twenty-six french fries, 9 slices of pizza, and a LARGE sweet tea! And that's just in my bag!" Jonah bragged._

" _Oh yeah? Well that's nothing! Gina show them the turkey legs!"_

" _Hold it right there!"_

_The four froze and looked at each other with wide eyes._

" _Don't even think about running. Put down the bags and step away from them,_ _ **slowly**_ _." They all slowly took off their backpacks and stepped away from them as told. "Now turn around, slowly."_

_They turned around to see three security guards looking at them with suspicious glares. Emma recognized the fat one as the one they got away from._

" _These the ladies you were chasing, Sanchez?" The tall one asked._

_Tubby, uh Sanchez, nodded. "Yep! Caught them with a suspicious amount of food in several backpacks."_

_The third officer grunted, leaning down to pick up one of the bags. "Well, let's just see what we've got here." Opening the bag he let out a whistle. "Yeah, so obviously you're guilty. You guys wanna explain to us why you have all this stuff?"_

" _I want my one phone call!" David exclaimed._

" _There is no phone call right now. Just tell us why you have all of this stuff and why you're sneaking around here." Sanchez said, slightly intrigued._

_Regina stepped forward, her head held a little too high. "Is there something wrong with having food?"_

_The security guards looked at each other with hesitation. "Well no, but I doubt you paid for all of this." Sanchez said._

" _Let me handle this, I know these types." Emma whispered to the group. She cleared her throat and stepped forward. "Friends, countrymen, lend me your ears. Shall we not eat? Shall us as men and women not put this meat and cheesy bread in our mouths and consume it? What crime hath we committed to be hunted down like animals? SHALL WE NOT EAT?!" She exclaimed dramatically, finishing with a bow._

_Jonah, Regina, and David applauded softly, nodding their heads._

" _That was good."_

" _Yeah Wilson, you're a genius."_

" _Sexy as hell."_

_Emma nodded in acceptance. Of course she was a genius and of course she was sexy and of course she was the one to get them out of a compromising situation._

" _Yeaaahhhh, you folks are obviously either drunk or high so you're coming with us." The tall one said as he grabbed Emma and Regina by the arms and the other two got Jonah and David._

* * *

"And then they took us to the Disney jail and the rest you already know." Emma finished.

"And might I add that we're not banned for the rest of our lives. Just for the rest of the day. We can go back tomorrow." Regina said with an eye-roll.

Snow took a deep breath as they pulled into the parking lot of their resort. "So let me get this straight, Emma stop giggling! You four thought it was a good idea to get high in a children filled place, buy a LOT of food, and then defy authority. Is that what I'm hearing?"

Emma got out of the SUV and groaned. "Mom, we don't need this. Can we just go up to the room and take a nap? Like gosh, you're being such a mom right now."

"Newsflash, I AM YOUR MOTHER!" Snow yelled as they walked into the elevator.

"Pfft. Not mine. Not my mama. Nope, I don't think so!" Regina said as she snapped her fingers with attitude.

"Ha, not mine either! Am I right ladies?!" David said as he high fived Jonah and Regina.

Henry rolled his eyes and chuckled as they stepped out of the elevator and walked to their room. "This is gonna be a long night."

* * *

**The Next Day**

"We would like to apologize for our behavior."

Henry and Snow were sitting on the couch looking at the four adults standing in front of them. They had just gotten back from having breakfast and the four had asked them to come to the common area and have a seat.

"We were childish and immature and we acted foolish and for that we are sorry." Regina said apologetically.

"Yeah. Mom, Henry, we really screwed up and it made your fun day get cut short and that's not cool. Yesterday was a disaster and I am so sorry. We all are." Emma added.

"And we know it's gonna be hard to make this up to you but we promise we will eventually." David offered.

"And I know you guys don't know me that well but I really like you folks and Emma is like a sister to me and I feel like a made a bad first impression. So, to hopefully make up for the giant mistake we made, I got all of us tickets and V.I.P. passes to all of the Disney Parks!"

"WHAT?!" Snow and Henry jumped up in disbelief.

"GO GET DRESSED BECAUSE TODAY WE"RE GOING TO UNIVERAL STUDIOS!"


	16. Fearful Fighting

Regina sighed as she recalled the last two weeks. Two weeks. They ended up staying for not only Spring break but for a week after that. Surprisingly, it was her idea. She was enjoying simply being with her family and not having to deal with boring paperwork. No one objected to staying another week. Henry called his teachers and asked them to email him the homework for the week and they willing obliged. The rest of their trip was filled with trips to every Disney Park, too much eating, pictures after pictures, meaningless arguments, but most importantly, it was filled with a lot of love.

Her thoughts were interrupted as Emma walked into the room.

"Jonah made it back home." Emma said, flopping down on the bed next to her. She let out a content sigh, causing Regina to chuckle.

"Well that's good. Missed the bed dear?"

Emma grunted. "Ugh yes I did! Didn't you? I mean, the bed at the resort was nice but, nothing compares to our bed, in our room, in our home."

Regina hummed in agreement. " _Ou_ r bed, in _our_ room, in _our_ home…I love the sound of that." She said, leaning down to kiss Emma's ear.

Emma raised her head, grinning. "Me too."

* * *

Emma sighed as she finished filling out another budget sheet. How Ruby and Leroy had spent so much money in two weeks is beyond her. She leaned back spinning around in her chair for a while before letting out another sigh, this one a lot heavier than the first. _I'm bored. So bored. Ultra-bored._ Emma took out her phone and went to her messages. She grinned when she saw the last conversation her and Regina had.

 **Knight In Tight Pants** : Ayo waddup

 **Queen of S(ass):** …

 **Knight In Tight Pants:** What you doin?

 **Queen of S(ass):** …..in bed.

 **Knight In Tight Pants:** without me? :(

 **Queen of S(ass):** You're literally laying right next to me.

 **Knight In Tight Pants:** Send Nudes.

 **Queen of S(ass):** Look to your left.

 **Knight in Tight Pants:** Damn. Nice. You single?

 **Queen of S(ass):** No.

 **Knight In Tight Pants:** Damn, need me a freak like that.

 **Queen of S(ass):** Want to see how freaky I can really be?

 **Knight In Tight Pants:** oh hell yeah.

 **Queen of S(ass):** Lol jk.

Emma chuckled as she remembered the short tickle fight that occurred right after that. She turned to look at the clock. 12:37pm. _Hm, I wonder if Gina's done with that meeting yet._ Emma picked up the phone and dialed Regina's direct number.

"Mayor Mills speaking."

"Reginnaaaaaaaaa." Emma whined into the phone.

Regina bit back a chuckle, attempting to remain serious. "Yes, this is she. May I ask who is calling?"

Emma let out another whine. "Regina you know it's me! I'm bored!"

Regina bit her lip as a laugh threatened to come out. "Hello Bored! Hm, I didn't realize we got another dwarf in town. How may I help you, Miss Bored?"

"Babeee!" Emma whined.

Regina chuckled, deciding to put the blonde of her misery. "Well how do you suppose we rid you of your boredom?"

Emma shrugged, forgetting Regina couldn't see her action. "Wanna do some wedding planning?"

Regina blinked. "Oh you must be really bored, my dear."

"You have no idea." Emma finished with a sigh.

"Oh I have quite the idea. The meeting I just had was completely unbearable. He thought I was taking notes, but really I was making a list of things to get your mother for her birthday. Your _mother_ , Emma!" Regina said, shaking her head at the thought of the meeting.

Emma let out a whistle. "So what I'm hearing is, we're both bored out of our minds and I know neither one of us have eaten since breakfast, so I'm going to throw a suggestion out there and you tell me how it sounds, okay?"

"Okay." Regina answered with a small grin.

"How about I go get us some food, we take an hour lunch, and then, wait for it…an hour nap."

"Ah, honestly that's the best idea I've heard all day, dear."

"Onion rings or French fries?" Emma asked.

"Oooooo, surprise me."

Emma chuckled. "I'll see you in a few babe."

"Can't wait." Regina responded with a smile.

Ten minutes later Emma walked in Regina's office with a large, brown paper bag, two root beers, and an amused smirk. Regina waited until Emma sat the food down before she tugged the blonde closer and pressed kisses on the corner of her lips.

"I'm assuming that smirk is in place for another reason other than seeing me?" She asked teasingly.

"While I am happy to see you as always, your assumption is correct. I think your secretary has a crush on me." She boasted, still wearing a smirk.

Regina frowned, looking up at the woman. "Sandra?"

Emma nodded, her smirk turning to a full on grin. "She said she admired my Sheriff work and said that she was also very happy that I was back in town." Emma bragged, wagging her eyebrows playfully.

Regina rolled her eyes. "Dear, she's probably just glad you're back because Ruby and Leroy were in charge for two weeks."

Emma smirked. "She also said I looked good in my jacket and that it was one of her favorites." Emma boasted, standing tall as she pulled on her signature leather jacket.

Regina pulled back and raised an eyebrow at the blonde. "Oh did she?"

Emma nodded smugly. "Yep."

Regina stepped back and crossed her arms, looking at the Sheriff. "Well Sheriff, it looks as though you have a choice to make. Me or her? Choose wisely." She said in mock seriousness.

Emma tilted her head to the side, looking as if she was in deep thought. "Hmm, I think I'll stick with this gorgeous woman I'm with. She's pretty amazing."

Regina suppressed a grin. "Just pretty amazing?"

Emma pulled the smaller woman into her arms. "More amazing than words can express." Emma whispers before kissing her queen.

"Hm. Good answer, Sherriff." Regina murmured.

Emma hummed. "Hi," She said, bumping her nose against Regina's playfully.

Regina grinned goofily. "Hi yourself." She said, leaning in to steal another kiss.

"Should we eat now?"

Regina pulled back with an amused smile. "I don't know, are you done with your antics?" She teased.

Emma rolled her eyes and began unpacking the bag of food. "Come on now. We both know I'll never be done with my antics."

Regina rolled her eyes and smiled as she sat down behind her desk. "Well how unfortunate for me." She said, stealing one of Emma's fries.

"You know, you always end up eating more of my fries than I do." Emma teased as she sat down.

"Well, I'm trying to keep you from eating yourself into an early grave. You're welcome."

Emma rolled her eyes playfully as she sat down and dug into her grilled cheese sandwich. They were silent for a while, both enjoying their food and each other's company.

"Regina?"

Regina looked up to see the Savior looking at her with a serious gaze. "Yes dear?"

"Are you scared?...Of marrying me? I mean, not necessarily marrying _me,_ but of being married in general. I know your last "marriage" wasn't ideal whatsoever, and I don't want you to feel confined or trapped in any way. I know you wouldn't have proposed to me if you didn't really want to marry me, I just….are you scared?"

Regina put down her fork and frowned, shaking her head. "I…I'm not afraid of feeling trapped or confined. Not with you. You make me feel free and strong. You make me feel _safe_."

Emma nodded. Shifting her attention back on her sandwich, although she never actually picked it up.

"Emma?'

"Hm?"

"Why did you ask?"

Regina watched as Emma shrugged and fidgeted with a french fry. The blonde wore a neutral expression, but Regina could see right through it. "Emma…are you scared?" Regina asked, almost a whisper.

Emma shrugged again, not making eye contact. Regina got up and walked around to sit on her desk in front of Emma.

"Emma…Em, please talk to me."

Emma shrugged. "It's stupid. I just…I just wanted to make sure that you were okay." Emma said, barely meeting Regina's eyes.

Regina tilted Emma's head up so the blonde was looking at her. "And now I'm making sure you're okay. What's wrong? Was it something I did? Or said? Or-"

"No, baby no no no! I promise you're perfect. You haven't done anything wrong." Emma said, taking Regina's hand in hers and kissing it gently.

Regina smiled at the gesture and squeezed Emma's hand. "Then what's the matter?"

"We…I...You-" Emma's shoulders slumped and she let go of Regina's hand. "I'm terrified."

Regina looked at her fiancée with soft eyes. She could tell Emma had more to say so she waited.

"I'm a mess." Emma said looking up at Regina. "I can't-" Emma got up and started pacing the office. "Regina I can't sit here and pretend like I'm not an absolute mess! I screw up stuff all of the time. You deserve so much better than me, Regina, and I feel like you know that. I…Regina you deserve to be treated and loved way better than I ever could. And I'm terrified because I don't want you to send me back when you realize I'm not what you signed up for. I'm terrified that I'm gonna let you and Henry down just like I've done with everyone else in my life. I'm scared because you guys are the most important people in my life, and…I'm afraid I'm gonna let you down." Emma sighed and plopped back down in her seat looking at the woman who means everything to her. Tears were streaming down the brunettes face.

"Gina…What happens when you realize what a screw up I am?" Emma whispered.

"Then I'll thank the Heavens that I finally don't have to be the only screw up in the relationship. I'll roll my eyes and ask you what you were thinking like I do now. But more importantly, I'll forgive you because I know you're human and humans screw up. That's part of life Emma." Regina took Emma's hand and pulled her up until the blonde was standing in front of her, foreheads touching. "I would never send you back, Emma. I don't even think it's in me to do such a thing. You are mine and I am yours. In this universe and every other one. No matter what you've done or what you will do, I will always be here for you. I will never leave you. I'll always be there waiting for you to come back, and when I feel I've waited too long, I'll come looking for you. I love you, forever and always. No matter what. Do you understand that?"

Emma leaned forward capturing Regina in a kiss. She poured everything that she could in the kiss. Her fears, her love, her commitment, her trust. "I love you so much." She said looking her love deeply in the eyes. "So much. And I'm sorry for messing up lunch and getting irrationally emotional."

Regina shook her head. "Never apologize for how you feel. You didn't mess up anything and you're not irrational. You're human. And your fears are understandable, sweetheart. Believe it or not, I had the same fear. I was afraid that you would finally see that I wasn't good enough for you. I was afraid of that too."

"What changed your mind?" Emma asked.

Regina smiled. "You did. Just now. When you explained why you were scared and when I looked at you and I saw the raw fear in your eyes at just the thought of not being good enough for me. I-it….It really hit me just how much you love me. I mean, I already knew you loved me, there was never a doubt in my mind. However, when you looked me in the eyes I knew. I knew that our love for each other could conquer anything, including fear. And my fear just…vanished."

"Why didn't you tell me? That you were scared, I mean."

Regina shrugged. "I didn't want to seem…I don't know, insecure? And I know you wouldn't have minded and I trust you with everything, especially my emotions, I just didn't want to make you unhappy or anything. I don't know, I figured if I didn't say it out loud then it would disappear. Does that make sense?"

Emma nodded. "Perfect sense, sweetheart."

They stood there holding each other in content. There was an air of understanding and relief. Love and commitment. Trust and unity. Acceptance.

Emma sat down and pulled Regina down on her lap, drawing a content hum from her fiancée. Emma grabbed her grilled cheese sandwich and put it in front of Regina's mouth.

Regina looked at the sandwich and then at Emma with a raised eyebrow. "You know I have my own food right?"

"Mhmm." Emma said with a grin.

"And what makes you think I'm going to eat this instead of my meal?"

Emma grinned. "Because you always end up taking at least one bite of my grilled cheese." Emma said with a smirk.

Regina rolled her eyes and bit the grilled cheese sandwich, barely repressing a moan. "Can we just trade meals?"

Emma grimaced as she looked at the kale salad sitting on the desk. "How about you help me eat my meal, and I'll help you eat yours. That way you have something a little unhealthy and I have something disgusting, I mean healthy."

Regina grinned and bit into the sandwich again.

* * *

About twenty minutes later the two women were soundly asleep on the couch. That is before the sound of Regina's cell phone woke them up.

"Ugh, don't answer it." Emma groaned.

"I have to. It could be an emergency." Regina picked up her phone and put it on speaker phone.

"Mayor Mills speaking." Regina answered in her best mayoral tone, attempting to sound like she hadn't just woken up.

"Um, yes…Mayor Mills, this is Principal Pognas, uh at the school. I called the Sherriff's station but no one answered. I'm calling to inform you that your son Henry has gotten in a fight and we need you to come down to th-" The man stopped speaking when a puff of white smoke appeared in his office along with two women, one of whom he was just talking to. He hung up the phone slowly.

Regina turned to see Henry sitting in a chair next to another boy who she barely recognized. There were two other adults there who she assumed were the boy's parents. She bent down to examine her son. "Henry, are you okay?"

Henry nodded. "Yeah mom, I'm fine." Henry said with a small smile.

Emma pushed his hair back and raised an eyebrow. "Did you win?"

"Emma!" Regina hissed.

Henry winked at his blonde mother and met her half way for a fist bump.

Regina rolled her eyes as she stood and looked at the principal.

"So what exactly happened Mr. Pognas?"

"I'll tell you what happened, your son attacked ours!" The mother of the other boy yelled.

"Now now, Mrs. Turse. Let's not paint the picture that way. Your son is not innocent here." Mr. Pognas said. He turned to address Regina and Emma. "It seems as though Kevin here was saying some pretty hateful and disrespectful things to your son and therefore, Henry um…took action."

Emma and Regina nodded.

"I, for one, don't see the problem, Mr. Pognas. Seems pretty reasonable to me." Regina said eyeing the boy, Kevin, who was sporting some pretty bad bruises.

"You think this behavior is acceptable?! No wonder your son is acting like this!" Mr. Turse fumed.

Regina got ready to take a step forward before being pulled back by her fiancée. "No, Regina. I've got this." Emma stepped in front of Regina and fixed the man with a glare. "I'd watch what you say very carefully, Mr. Turse."

"Please, parents, I simply want to settle their punishments in a peaceful manner." Mr. Pognas said calmly.

"Punishment?!" Regina turned with wide eyes. "You must be out of your damn mind if you think you're going to punish our son for standing up for himself!"

"You think it's okay for your child to act like this?! I cannot believe this!" Mrs. Turse yelled.

"What else can you expect from the evil queen?" Kevin said, but was quickly cut off by Henry's fists flying at his face again. Emma quickly pulled Henry off of the boy and held him back.

"YOU BROKE MY NOSE!" Kevin yelled as his mother fussed over his face.

"Talk smack, get smacked, bitch." Henry growled.

"Enough!" Principal Pognas yelled. He watched as the Mayor and Sherriff both tried to calm their son down and the Turse's tended to their son's nose. "Both boys will be suspended! Henry for a week and Kevin for three days."

"A week?!"

"Three days?!"

Mr. Pognas raised his hands, gaining silence. "Mr. Turse your son was bullying and saying hateful things to Henry, and verbal bullying is something we do not tolerate at this school. Mayor Mills, Sherriff, while Henry was defending himself, he did hit a student and we do not tolerate violence here."

"Well what can you expect from a boy who's raised by those types?" Mr. Turse mumbled.

Emma turned her head quickly. "Excuse me? And what type is that?"

Mr. Turse fixed Emma with a glare. "Witches! And not just any witches, he has the EVIL QUEEN as his influence! You people ar-"

He was cut off by Emma's fist flying across his face. He fell to the ground instantly, but Emma picked him up and flung him against the wall. "Let's get something clear! You can say whatever you wanna say in the privacy of your own home. But the moment you step outside and have the balls to say something about someone's family, you open yourself up to the consequences. You stand here and say shit about me? About my wife? About my son? And you think you're gonna get away with it? Fuck no! If I catch either of you, and I do mean any of you, saying anything else about my family, you will feel my wrath! Do I make myself fucking clear?!" Emma snarled.

The family nodded their heads quickly, all with wide eyes. They had never seen the Savior so angry and…threatening. But they knew it wasn't a threat, it was a promise.

Emma turned towards the principal. "You'll see Henry in a week." She said, before turning to her family. She leaned in and kiss Regina slowly. "You guys ready to go?"

"Beyond ready." Henry said, opening the door and walking out of the office.

Regina turned towards the principal. "Well I think we've all learned a very important lesson, haven't we?"

"Wh-what lesson would that be?" Mrs. Turse sputtered.

Regina smiled her biggest mayoral smile. "Talk shit, get hit, bitch." She said, before grabbing Emma's hand and waltzing out of the office.

* * *

"So…am I in trouble?" Henry asked as he walked down the sidewalk between his mothers.

"Nah kid. We're just proud of you for standing up for yourself." Emma said, looking at her son.

"Henry…what did he say to make you so angry?" Regina inquired. She had never seen Henry look as angry as he did. She'd seen him angry before, angry at her, specifically. But this level of anger was beyond anything she thought Henry was capable of. And fighting? It had to have been bad.

"He was…I don't really wanna repeat it Mom. I don't want you two to get any more upset than you already are."

Regina rubbed his back comfortingly. "It's okay, Henry. You don't have to worry about us."

"He just…he was saying how you were still evil and he said that I could never be a real man because you two were raising me. I just…there was a lot more stuff but I can't bring myself to repeat any of it. I tried so hard to just walk away, but he just kept going and going and I just…snapped." Henry sighed. "He's such a douche."

Regina nodded. "Well, I'm really proud of you my Prince. You stood up for your mother and I and our family. And you could never be in trouble for that."

Henry smiled as he linked his arms with both of his mothers. "I love you guys."

"We love you too, Hen." Emma said, pressing a kiss on the top of his head.

"I do have to ask though, where did you learn to fight?" Regina inquired with a raised eyebrow.

Henry shrugged. "Ma taught me."

Regina's head whipped towards Emma. "When?"

"It was when we lived in New York. I taught him how to box." Emma said sheepishly.

Regina smirked. "So you're a boxer? How did I not know this?"

Emma rubbed the back of her neck. "I wouldn't call myself a boxer. I just dabble."

Henry shook his head. "No, Mom, Ma is amazing! She's really good! She's knocked out guys Jonah's size"

Regina grinned at her son's enthusiasm and Emma's embarrassed face. "Is that so?" Regina asked, winking at the blonde.

Emma ducked her head shyly.

"So, since I'm out of school now, what are we going to do? Are you guys going back to work?" Henry asked.

Regina looked over at Emma with raised eyebrows. "Well, I'm finished with all of my meetings and paperwork. Emma?"

"I'm on call all day, so I'm pretty much free until something happens that needs my attention." She shrugged.

"Awesome! So what's the plan?"

"Well, your Mom and I had planned a nap after we ate lunch. I could still go for one of those."

Henry hummed. "Oh yeah, I could go for a nap too."

"Can we build a fort?"

Emma and Henry looked at the brunette woman in shock.

"What? It was fun last time." Regina mumbled, drawing a chuckle from her family.

* * *

"Mom, are you okay?" Henry asked.

He and his brunette mother were preparing lasagna for dinner. Emma had gotten called off earlier to help with some emergency with some of the townspeople in the bar, so that left he and Regina making the blonde's favorite. He was chopping up onions as his Mom stirred the sauce.

Regina turned around, with a confused look. "Of course, Henry. Why wouldn't I be?"

Henry shrugged. "Because of what happened with Kevin and his parents."

Regina smiled at her son's worry for her. "Sweetheart, I'm fine. I'm used to being seen as evil. It's fine. I've changed and that's what's important to me."

Henry smiled. "Yeah you have changed, Mom. But maybe you've changed too much. I mean, I can't speak for anyone else, but I wouldn't have minded seeing a fireball or three thrown in that office today."

Regina threw her head back and let out a hearty laugh, Henry soon joining in.

"Well, maybe next time, dear." Regina teased, as she bumped Henry's hip with hers.

Henry hummed. "Hey, do you think Ma is okay? She was pretty angry. Like…Mom, I've never seen her like that before."

Regina nodded in agreement. "I know, sweetheart, I know. Even I got nervous for a second when she threw the poor man across the room. Your mother is a fighter in more ways than one, and she fights for things that are hers. She's a protector if I've ever seen one, and today that side of her came out at full capacity."

Henry nodded. "I just don't want her to be upset. I don't want either of you to be upset, ya know? I begged Principal Pognas not to call you guys, but that didn't really work out. I just don't ever want my problems to burden you guys."

Regina caressed her son's face, looking at him with a soft expression only reserved for him and Emma. "Henry, you could never be a burden to us. You're our child. Our light. Our little believer. Our Prince. It's our job as parents to be there for you no matter what. And not just our job, but it's our pleasure to be there for you, because we love you. Okay? No matter what trouble you may find yourself in, I want you to know that it's always okay to call us. _Always._ Got it?"

Henry wrapped his mother in a hug and let out a content sigh. "Got it."

* * *

Regina watched as Emma emptied the dishwasher, humming the tune of 'It's Beginning to Look A Lot Like Christmas', even though it was still April. She shook her head as she went and wrapped her arms around the blonde from behind. "You called me your wife today."

Emma turned in Regina's arms, a confused look on her face. "I did? When?"

Regina grinned. "When you were tearing Turse a new one."

Emma thought for a moment before her face changed in realization. "Oh. I'm sorry babe. I kind of lost it and just went off."

"You don't have to apologize, dear. I thought it was pretty endearing. And our son thought it was pretty sweet too."

"Really?"

Regina nodded. "He's worried about you though."

Emma frowned. "What? Why?"

"He didn't want his problems to burden us. He doesn't want us to have to feel negative things because of him."

"He could never be a burden to us. He knows that right?" Emma asked as worry lines filled her forehead.

Regina nodded. "I told him that as his parents we're going to be there for him no matter what. And that he never has to worry about being a burden to us, because it could never happen."

Emma leaned forward and placed a kiss on Regina's forehead. "Thank you. I'll still talk to him though."

"You probably should. Your anger today was very…worrying. I thought I was going to have to stop you from killing the man." Regina said softly, tucking a piece of blonde hair behind Emma's ear.

Emma sighed. "I wanted to. God I wanted to so bad, Gina. I…he started saying those things about you guys and I just couldn't handle it. But I'm sorry I lost my temper. I should I have kept my cool, but I just got so-"

"Protective. You protected us and defended us, just like our son did. And just like I told him, you never have to apologize for that." Regina reassured.

Emma sighed again. "I know. I just feel like I've set a bad example now or something. I mean, not necessarily for Henry, but like…as the Savior. I know Turse is gonna tell my parents about this, he was like one of their advisors or something, right? And then I'm gonna have to sit through a stern talking to about how a princess is supposed to behave and blah blah blah." Emma complained.

Regina shook her head. "You may be a princess by birth, Emma, but in your heart and in your actions, you're a knight. You're a protector, a fighter, a survivor, a noble, brave, courageous knight. And we couldn't be more proud of our knight, we just want to make sure you're okay emotionally."

"As long as you and Henry are okay, I'm great. Are you okay? How do you feel about everything that happened this afternoon? About what they said?"

Regina shrugged as she played with the hem of Emma's shirt. "It doesn't bother me. Remember dear, I'm used to being called evil. It was literally a part of my name for the longest, and I loved it. No matter how reformed I become, evil will always be a part of who I was. It only bothers me when it's said in front of Henry. It just reminds me of the time when he hated me and it…" Regina shakes her head, ignoring the tears that are threatening to fall. "I don't like remembering that." Regina finished in a whisper.

Regina felt a warm embrace come from behind her and she smiled at the warmth.

"I never hated you, Mom. I was just confused and scared. But I never hated you, Mama." Henry said as rested his chin on his brunette mother's shoulder.

Regina turned into Henry's embrace. "Never?"

"Never have and I never could."

"I love you two." Emma said with a wide grin as she pulled both of the shorter brunettes into a hug.

"Eh I'm pretty sure I love you guys more." Henry responded with a smirk.

"Well you two must be extremely sleep deprived, because it seems as though you've forgotten that I love the two of you more than anything." Regina corrected as she playfully jabbed her two loves in the stomach, causing them to laugh.

"Ugh is this utterly disgusting. I hope it's not going to be like this all of the time. I can't live under these nauseating conditions."

The Swan-Mills group turned to see Zelena standing in the entrance of the kitchen with baby Robyn in her arms.

"Zelena, when I gave you a key, I made sure to reiterate that it was only for emergencies." Regina said, annoyed. "And what are you doing here at-" Regina looked at the microwave clock. "10:49pm?"

"We're moving in!"

"WHAT?!" Three voices yelled simultaneously.

"Oh, do relax. It'll only be for a week…or two. Our apartment flooded because _someone_ said she could fix the sink!" Zelena yelled in a teasing manner.

Before they could inquire who she was talking about, Ruby strode into the kitchen, wrapping her arm around Zelena's waist. "For the last time woman, your sink is janky and no one could have fixed that thing!"

"Hold up hold up hold up!" Emma said, looking at the two women. "You two live together?"

Both Ruby and Zelena nodded. "We're dating." Ruby responded, as if it was obvious.

"What the hell?"

"Since when?"

"Honestly, not even surprised."


	17. Dance or Flop

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zelena and Ruby are together now?  
> Also Henry can't dance

Emma and Regina were in the living room, sitting across from Zelena and Ruby. Henry had taken Robyn upstairs to put her to bed a while ago. There was a long silence as they let Emma wrap her head around the news.

"So let's go over this again. I just wanna make sure I'm understanding you correctly. So this started two months ago, correct?" Zelena and Ruby nodded. "And it was just casual flirting then right?" They nodded. "And then you started sleeping together….two weeks ago?"

Ruby shook her head. "The week before you guys went on your vacation."

Emma turned to Zelena. "So that's the reason you said you couldn't come with us on vacation?" Zelena nodded. "So you could bang Rubes?" Zelena rolled her eyes but nodded anyway.

"So when did you two actually get together?"

Ruby smirked. "The day after you texted me about your little competition with Regina." Ruby said.

Regina hit Emma's arm and glared at the blonde. "You told her about that?!"

Emma scoffed. "As if you didn't get help from Maleficent?" Emma asked, already knowing the answer, which made the brunette sit back in defeat. Emma turned back to the couple in front of her, her eyes falling on Ruby. "Rubes, why didn't you tell me?"

Ruby frowned. "Dude, I did. I literally texted you that exact day!"

"What? No you didn't." Emma pulled out her phone looking for the messages. "Ruby, all it says is, "I hooked the green." How was I supposed to know that's what you meant?"

"Bruh, what else could it have meant?!"

"Dude, I thought you were talking about weed!" Emma half yelled, remembering the sleeping toddler upstairs.

Ruby sat back, her mouth making an 'o' shape. "Okay…I can see how you would have gotten that. Which explains your weird request to save you some."

"As fun as this is to watch," Regina cut in. "I would like to focus on the fact that you all are under the assumption that you're staying here?"

Zelena rolled her eyes. "Oh dear sister, please spare us all the fight. We all know you're going to give in and let us stay here." She proclaimed, fixing Regina with a knowing stare.

Regina met her sister's glare with a glare of her own. _There's no way I'm giving in without a fight._ She has to remain in control. She can't give in. She can feel Emma looking at her and she knows that if she turns her head, the blonde will be looking at her with puppy dog eyes and she'll break. She can't break. Regina keep her face of defiance intact, refusing to break. Finally Zelena sighs, and Regina knows she's won.

"Fine. We'll pitch in and help around the house. Anything you want."

Regina smiled widely, satisfied with her sister's answer. "Well, if you insist."

* * *

**Monday Afternoon**

"No we can't sit them next to each other." Emma shook her head furiously. She and Regina were currently working on the seating chart for the wedding and Regina was attempting to put Jonah and Archie at the same table.

Regina frowned. "Why not?"

Emma shook her head again. "Jonah has a thing about people like Archie."

"People like Archie?"

"Yeah. You know how he's always attempting to give advice or his input when it not asked for. Or like the way he talks to everyone as if he's the smartest person in the room, when it's obvious he's not. Yeah, Jonah hates people like that."

Regina nodded, partially from amusement and partially from understanding. "Okay, then what about sitting him at table nine with Eric and Ariel?"

Emma looked it over and nodded slowly. "Yeahhhh, that'll work well."

Regina caught the look on her fiancée's face. "What are you thinking?"

Emma turned to Regina, her face thoughtful and hesitant. "Can Jonah be in the wedding? I mean I know you barely know him and it's random and stuff but, he's basically my only family outside of Storybrooke. He means a lot to me and I really would like it if he could share this moment with me. He's my big brother."

Regina smiled at Emma as she tucked a piece of blonde hair behind the woman's ear. "Of course he can be in the wedding, sweetheart. He's really important to you. And I may not know him as well as you do, but I did get high with man and spent two weeks with him. I feel as though that constitutes some level of closeness. Plus I really like him. I think he's a pretty good influence on Henry and he got along well with your father. I'd be happy to have him as my brother-in-law." Regina stated with a reassuring smile.

Emma grinned excitedly and pecked Regina on the lips. "You're too good to be true, ya know that?"

Regina shrugged nonchalantly. "All in a day's work."

Emma rolled her eyes teasingly and turned her attention back to the seating chart. "Okay so that means Jonah will be sitting at the head table, so we can sit him right between Henry and Dad. That work for you?"

Regina nodded as she moved the little chair and name tag to the head table of the 3-D seating chart. At the head table, Zelena, Belle, Snow, and Maleficient were seated next to Regina, while Ruby, Henry, Jonah, and David were seated next to Emma. "Perfect. Now I have a request."

"Anything."

Regina closed her eyes and let a deep breath. "Iwanttotakedanceclasses."

Emma tilted her head to the side, imitating a confused puppy. ""Huh?"

Regina let out another sigh, finally looking Emma in the eyes. "I want to take dance classes."

Emma's eyebrows raised in shock. "Oh! Okay. That's fine babe. We can do that!"

Regina eyed her fiancée suspiciously. "Really? That easy?"

Emma frowned. "Of course, baby. You don't have to be ashamed of it."

Now it was Regina's turn to frown. "Ashamed of what?"

Emma's frown deepened. "Ashamed of not knowing how to dance. Isn't that what we're talking about?"

Regina's eyebrows shot up and her mouth fell open in disbelief. "I-I _can_ dance. _You're_ the reason I want to take the classes!"

Emma looked at Regina in shock. "Wha-What?! Regina I can dance!"

Regina folded her arms, giving Emma an 'are you kidding me' look.

"Regina, I'm serious! I can dance!"

"I don't mean your usual sexual grinding and mediocre robot."

Emma shook her head and pointed her finger at her fiancée. "First of all, mediocre? Psh, you know that's not true. Secondly, I actually can dance, babe."

Regina looked at Emma with disbelief.

Emma huffed. "Ruby!" Emma marched into the living room where Ruby and Zelena were watching tv.

Ruby paused the tv and turned her attention to an annoyed looking Regina and her determined looking best friend. "Yeah?"

"Tell Regina I can dance!"

Regina rolled her eyes. "Emma-"

"No, Ruby tell her!"

Ruby nodded her head aggressively. "Yeah Reggie, she can really dance. She taught me quite a few dances. She's really good."

Emma turned to Regina looking smug. "See? Told ya."

Regina rolled her eyes again. "Ruby backing you up means nothing. No offense Ruby. Also never call me that again."

Ruby raised her hands. "None taken. And yes ma'am."

Emma shook her head, letting out a huff. She took her phone out of her back pocket and headed over to the stereo system. She plugged in her phone and pressed play, her selected song feeling the room.

Regina snorted as the sound of 'Beauty and the Beast' filled the room. "Really? This song?"

Emma shrugged. "I like the movie." Emma snapped her fingers, changing their outfits and clearing out most of the furniture in the living room. Regina was dressed in a golden dress that stopped right above her knees and flared at the ends. Her 4-inch heels were navy blue and surprisingly comfortable. Emma, on the other hand, was dressed in a navy blue suit, white shirt, and a gold tie. Her oxford shoes were navy blue as well.

Ruby let out a whistle. "Damn."

Regina nodded in agreement. "Damn indeed."

Emma smirked extending her hand to Regina. "May I have this dance?"

Regina nodded, taking Emma's hand. She let out a gasp when Emma immediately pulled her close and began gliding them around the room. Regina had learned to dance when she was a little girl, a requirement of her mother. However, no instructor she had ever had was this good. She'd never felt like she was floating when dancing. How Emma was doing this was completely beyond her. She closed her eyes as she let the woman glide her around the room.

When the song came to an end, Emma snapped her fingers again and the music changed. Regina recognized the rhythm and knew exactly what dance they were about to do. _Salsa._ Regina looked at Emma's held out hands, raising her eyebrow at the blonde. The question in her gaze was clear. Emma nodded confidently. Regina grabbed Emma's hands and they both started moving to the rhythm. Regina was once again impressed with how smoothly Emma moved. Her hips moved as though it was something she had been doing all of her life, same for the way her feet moved. Emma spun Regina out quickly and watched with a smile as the brunette spun back in doing a quick split. Emma pulled Regina up, still keeping with the beat of the music.

Zelena and Ruby watched in awe as Emma picked Regina up and swung the brunette around her body as if she weighed nothing.

"Did she teach you how to do that?" Zelena asked, not taking her eyes off of the dancing pair.

Ruby shook her head. "I didn't even know she _could_ do that."

When the song came to its end, Regina and Emma were standing with their foreheads touching, both breathing heavily.

"Remember that time you said I couldn't dance?" Emma joked.

"Shut up" Regina commanded, pulling Emma in by her tie and kissing her soundly.

* * *

Regina played with the ends of Emma's hair as she laid on top of the naked blonde. "Where did you learn to dance like that?"

Emma sighed. "Jail."

Regina's head popped up. "Really?"

Emma nodded. "Yeah. There was this woman named Lydia and I met her my second week there. She was in for killing her mom's abusive boyfriend. Though she never really did it. Her younger sister did, but she took the blame for her. She's an amazing person."

"Agreed."

"Anyway, before she got thrown in jail, she was a dance instructor. So one day, I pass by one of the rooms and I see her waltzing around by herself. She was moving so freely and she looked happy. She was in jail for a crime she didn't commit and she was dancing and happy. It made me a little sad, though. To see her dancing alone. I figured I didn't have anything to lose so I asked her to teach me. That way she didn't have to dance alone anymore, and I learned a new talent."

Regina smiled down at the blonde. "Ever the savior. Was it hard to learn?"

Emma chuckled. "Each dance had a different kind of difficulty. With the waltz it was the lightness."

Regina tilted her head. "Lightness?" She asked, intrigued.

Emma nodded. "Being light on my feet. It was hard to perfect. I don't know what it was but for some reason when it came to dancing, I had to be perfect at it. I needed to be. I think it's the fact that my life had been such a mess and I was craving some kind of structure. So when Lydia told me to stand up straight, keep my head up, and glide, I did. When she told me to lead, I did. When she told me to trust her and trust myself, I did. When she told me to breathe and finally take control, I did. For the first time in my life, I felt like I was actually in control. No matter what dance I do, whether I'm joking around and doing the robot, or doing the Tango, I feel in control. I feel my best. I feel like I can't be taken down. And once I gained that feeling and that confidence, it made me feel lighter. Which resulted in my feet becoming lighter."

"Salsa dancing was a completely different feat. It wasn't necessarily hard, I just had to work on reading my partner. Sometimes Lydia would go out for a spin, but it would catch me off guard. Or there were times were she would do the splits and I thought she was going to spin out. It was hard to predict what would happen next."

Regina hummed. "And how did you learn how to do that?"

"Instead of getting caught up in every move, I just let the music lead me. There are some dances where you can kind of just move to the music and not really pay attention to it. But not with salsa dancing. It leads you. Think about it. If you were gonna salsa dance with no music, how would you start off?"

Regina thought for a moment. "I'd have to get a song in my mind first."

Emma nodded. "Exactly. You have to feel the rhythm of it. You have to be there. Within the notes, within the melody, within the rhythm. Once I gave the music the power to lead, it was easy as pie."

Regina nodded, taking in the information. "What else did you learn from her?"

"Quite a lot actually. I learned swing dance, latin dancing, ballroom, street dancing, Indian dancing, ballet, tap dancing, and on and on and on."

Regina sat up looking at Emma in shock. "Seriously?"

Emma nodded with a grin. "Yup!"

Regina shook her head. "You learned all of that why you were in jail? Pregnant?"

Emma shrugged. "There's a lot of time to dance when you have nothing else to do. Plus when I got out of jail I started taking more dance classes to perfect what I had already learned."

Regina stared at Emma for a while before leaning in and giving her a kiss.

"Not that I'm complaining, but what was that for?"

Regina wrapped her arms around Emma's torso and laid her head down on Emma's shoulder. "You're amazing and I love you."

"And I love you….So does that mean no dance lessons?"

Regina snorted. "No dance lessons. Your son on the other hand…"

"Oh God. I promised he got his lack of rhythm from Neal. It actually scares me, Gina."

Regina chuckled as she sat up. "It'll be quite the task, but I think we can teach him a thing or two. Now, let's get up because I'm hungry."

"Well, I wasn't the one that dragged me upstairs for mid-day sex." Emma teased.

Regina got up from the bed and started walking towards the bathroom. "So I'm guessing that means you wouldn't want to join me in the shower?" She asked innocently, turning with a questioning look.

Emma quickly got out of the bed and was in front of the brunette in an instant. "I never said that."

"Mhmm."

* * *

"I'm home!"

Regina, who was sat on the barstool next to Emma, turned to look at the woman. "He gets that from you."

Emma shrugged. "We're home too!" She yelled back at her son, grinning at Regina's eye roll.

Henry entered the kitchen, kissed both of his mothers on the cheek, and immediately went to the refrigerator. "How are you guys home before me?"

Emma shrugged. "We didn't go into work today."

Henry looked up from the sandwich he was making and frowned. "What? How did I miss that? I thought you guys had already left the house when I texted you saying I was going to the library."

Emma shook her head. "Nah, we decided to sleep in. We didn't get up until about 10am."

Henry hummed. "So what did you guys do today?"

Regina smiled as she remembered the events of the day. "Well we started out by working on the seating chart for wedding."

"Oooo, can I see it later on?"

Regina nodded. "Of course dear."

"So what else did you all do?" Henry asked, before taking another bit of his sandwich.

"Well, I proved to your Mom I could dance. She was extremely impressed." Emma boasted.

Henry looked between his mothers in disbelief, his eyes ending on his brunette mother. "Really?"

Regina nodded, a dreamy smile coming over her face. "She's terrific, Henry. We ballroom danced and did the salsa. I've found myself thinking about it quite a lot this evening."

Henry hummed. "How have I never seen you dance?"

Emma shrugged. "I don't know. I thought you'd seen me dance around the house."

"Yeah Ma, but you're usually doing the moonwalk or something."

Emma shrugged again. "But speaking of dancing, we have something we need to talk to you about."

"Go for it."

"Well, we'll obviously be having our first dance as a married couple at the wedding. But both of us also want to have an individual dance with you. How does that sound?"

A large smile spread across the young teenager's face. "That sounds awesome!"

Regina smiled widely. "We glad you feel that way, Henry! You start dance lessons tomorrow." She said, getting up and heading to the refrigerator.

"Wh-what? B-but I can already dance!" Henry sputtered.

Emma and Regina looked at each other and then back at their son.

"Then show us." Emma challenged.

Henry looked between his moms again before his shoulders slumped in defeat. "Fine. I dance like a fish." Henry said, causing his mothers to laugh.

"Aw, sweetheart don't compare yourself to a fish." Regina said, as she patted her son's shoulder.

"Yeah, a fish is a lot more fluid and smooth with its motions. You're more like a fish out of water….just flopping around."

Regina began laughing hysterically as Emma started imitating a flopping fish. Henry huffed as he crossed his arms and scowled.

"I can't believe this. Parents aren't supposed to make fun of their kids! Come on, stop laughing! Are you guys gonna teach me or what?" Henry grumbled.

Emma and Regina finally stopped laughing and Regina ran a comforting hand down her son's back. "Yes yes dear, of course we'll teach you."

Emma leaned across the counter and ruffled her son's hair. "Yeah sport, don't worry about it. We'll make sure you don't embarrass your fish-like self." She assured with a chuckle.

"Mooom, make her stop!"

* * *

Zelena and Ruby sat on the sofa watching the cringe-worthy scene in front of them. Regina had gotten off of work early and came in the house to her son who was itching to start their dance practice for the wedding. Which is what led to Zelena and Ruby sitting down and watching the show as Robyn watched from her play area. Henry had stepped on Regina's feet over a hundred times in the past hour.

"This is absolutely awful." Zelena mumbled as she took a sip of wine.

Ruby nodded. "Where the hell did he get his rhythm from?"

Zelena shrugged. "Darling, I have no idea. It must have been from his father."

Ruby snorted. "Yeah, I could see that. Neal didn't seem like the type that could bust a groove."

Zelena chuckled. "I bet it takes more than a month for him to finally waltz properly."

Ruby grinned. "A month? No no no, I'm sure it'll take less than a week. He's working with Regina Mills here."

"Yes, but you're overlooking the fact that she is a perfectionist and won't settle for less."

"Wanna make a friendly wager?"

Zelena smirked as she looked at her lover. "Always."

"If I win, you have to give me a back rub anytime I want one for the next month."

"And if I win, you're on diaper duty for the next month." Zelena countered.

Ruby stuck her hand out and watched as her lover shook it. "Deal."

Just then, Henry went and turned off the music. "Mom, I'm not getting this." He said, very frustrated.

"Awh, sweetheart, it is okay. You'll get it. Maybe you just have to think about it in a different way." Regina said comfortingly.

Henry tilted his head to the side. "In what different way?"

Regina thought for a moment before glancing at the bookshelf in the corner of the room. She turned to Henry with a smile. "Think of it like writing a story."

"A story?"

Regina nodded. "Exactly like a story." Regina turned the music back on and made her way back over to her son. "Now, you're going to lead me, like you would a story. You know how you want the story to go, what turns you wish to take, and what message you want to get across to your audience. Now, just put it in the language of dance. When you dance, you're telling a story. The floor is your paper, you are the author, and I am the pen. Now write."

Ruby and Zelena watched as Henry took a deep breath and begin to lead his mother around the room. They looked at each other in shock as the boy slowly but surely started to dance like a human being.

"Well I'll be damned." Zelena mumbled, as Ruby smiled widely.


	18. A Slight Miscalculation

**One Month Later**

Regina, Emma, and Henry were sitting at the table in Snow and David's apartment. They had come over for a family dinner but also to give the couple some news. Dessert had been finished and the dinner had been awkward at best, but neither Charming wanted to draw attention to the strange behavior being displayed by the Swan-Mills crew. However, Snow eventually couldn't take it anymore and decided to bite the bullet.

"Okay so what's going on? Emma, you've barely eaten anything, Regina you've eaten everything, and Henry you haven't said a word since you've gotten here. What's wrong?" Snow asked.

Emma sighed and shrugged her shoulders. "Nothing, Mom, we're fine."

David frowned, looking at his daughter's behavior and the way Regina rolled her eyes at the statement, which was obviously a lie. "No…something's wrong. What happened?"

"Nothing is the matter." Regina grumbled.

Henry sighed and put down his fork. "You guys might as well tell them. They'll find out eventually anyway." He spat, causing his mothers to flinch. The four adults watched as Henry angrily got up and stomped up the stairs.

"What the hell is going on?!" Snow asked in a demanding tone.

Emma shrugged again. "Henry's right, we might as well just tell you. Regina and I aren't getting married anymore. We called off the engagement."

Snow and David blinked. For the first time of the evening, they noticed how neither one of the women were wearing their rings.

"Maybe I didn't hear you correctly, but it sounds like you said that you called off the engagement." David said slowly.

Regina rolled her eyes. "Yes, you heard correctly. We called it off. Miss Swan and I are no longer together anymore. It is not that hard of a concept to grasp."

"Wh-what-how-when-WHY?!" Snow sputtered.

Emma let out an annoyed huff. "Look, it doesn't matter why, okay? Sometimes things just don't work out. That's life. You get over it and you move on." Emma said in a nonchalant voice.

"Emma, sweetie you don't mean that. What about true love? What about your happy ending? You both know that you're each other's happy ending. If you know that, you can make it through anything!" Snow said, her expression pleading.

"Snow, please spare us the hope speech. We are adults here. Everything isn't always rainbows and flowers." Regina said with an eye roll.

There was a pause before David decided to speak again. "So what does this mean? Emma, are you moving out? What about Henry? How does he feel about this?"

"Yeah Dad, I'll be moving out. And I think by Henry's reaction, you can tell that he's not too happy about it." Emma responded.

David let out a long breath and rubbed Snow's back as she looked at him with a defeated face. "We just don't understand what caused this. Was this a sudden thing or was it gradual?"

"It was gradual." Regina whispered. "You don't just walk away from something all at once. There are little things that build up. You wake up one morning and you just realize that something's different. Just like falling in love, it was gradual and the little things added up." Regina stood from the table and headed to the front door. "Miss Swan, I'm sure you won't mind returning Henry home." She said, before exiting the apartment.

Snow and David turned to Emma who was left looking at the front door longingly. She cleared her throat and stood up from the table as well. "Well then, now that that's over, I'm going upstairs to see about Henry."

Snow and David watched as Emma headed upstairs. They looked at each other, both with confused and bewildered faces. "What the hell is happening?" David mumbled.

"I have no idea! Have noticed anything different about them in the past few months or so?" Snow asked.

David shook his head. "No, I would have mentioned it. I just…it seems so sudden, ya know?"

Snow sighed as she leaned against her husband. "I don't know David, but we have to do something! There's no way they can just call off the wedding like that!"

"Snow, I think this is more than just the wedding. They're not together anymore! How are we supposed to fix that?!" David half-yelled, his frustration getting the best of him. He had been so happy to be getting another daughter. Emma and Regina being happy had really made him smile, even on his worst days. And now his daughters weren't together anymore? What the actually hell?!

"Calm down, Charming. We'll get down to the bottom of this. We'll get them back together, even if we have to get the entire town involved." Snow said with a determined glare.

* * *

**A Week Earlier**

" _Emma…"_

" _Yes, my love?"_

" _I'm bored."_

" _Same. Watcha wanna do?"_

_Regina placed her book down and took her glasses off. "I'm not sure. Where's Henry?"_

" _Hanging with Nick."_

" _Chance?"_

" _With Hen."_

_Regina let out a sigh. Even the dog was out having a good time. She looked over at her clock and rolled her eyes. It was 7:32pm on a Saturday and this is how she and Emma had spent their day? Sitting in the bed reading and playing games on their phones? Pathetic._

" _Wanna make fun of Hallmark movies again?" Emma asked, not looking up from her phone._

" _Not really"_

" _Me neither."_

" _Ugh, Em when did we get so utterly boring?_ _I can't believe I'm saying this, but I actually miss Ruby and Zelena being here. At least when they were here we had a little chaos. Now everything is just boring._ _"_ _" Regina whined._

" _What?! Gina, we're not boring! We're just….domesticated." Emma defended, putting down her phone._

" _You make us down like cats…or the eldery."_

" _Well, based on your age…"_

_Regina flicked her wrist and with a gust of wind, Emma was pushed off of the bed, causing Regina to smile when she heard the satisfying thud._

" _Ouch! Rude." Emma groaned as she got up slowly._

" _You deserved it."_

_Emma grunted in response and got back in the bed. "I have an idea."_

" _If it has anything to do with my age, you're getting a fireball to your butt."_

" _Pfft. You're still on that? That happened ages ago. No pun intended. But here me out. We haven't pulled a prank on my Mom in a while so…" Emma drifted off knowing Regina would catch it._

" _Oooo, I love it when you talk dirty to me." Regina purred._

" _Alright, Jason Derulo., calm down. We have to come up with a plan first."_

_They brainstormed for a while, both throwing out ideas here and there. After a while, Emma snapped her fingers, breaking Regina and out of her thoughts._

" _I have an idea!"_

" _Well, please share with the class, my dearest."_

" _You're not going to like it though…." Emma warned._

_Regina let out a sigh and braced herself. "Go ahead."_

" _I wanna convince her that we've called off the engagement." Emma suggested, biting her lip._

_Regina chuckled. "That's gloriously evil, dear. I love it, why wouldn't I?"_

" _Because in order to convince her, we'll have to convince everyone else. And to convince everyone…"_

_Regina sighed, catching on to what Emma was saying. "We have to really act the part. Meaning we'll have to avoid each other and spend less time together and ugh you're right, I don't like it."_

_Emma hopped up and straddled Regina's lap. "Come on, Gi! It'll be so fun! We can fake argue! It'll be just like when I first moved here and we can get all up in each other's faces again! Think of it as foreplay."_

" _Foreplay huh? I do like the sound of that." Regina mumbled, her thoughts going to how sexy Emma looked anytime she was upset. Fake arguing would definitely be some great foreplay._

" _See? We can sneak around and find different ways to see each other! It's gonna be fun!" Emma said, wiggling her eyebrows._

" _We have to tell Henry though. I don't want him negatively affected by this."_

_Emma nodded. "Of course, sweetheart, that's a given. He's gonna get a kick out of it!" Emma said excitedly, grinning from ear to ear._

_Regina grinned feeling the excitement radiating from Emma and thinking about the look on Snow's face when they finally told her the news. She leaned over to her nightstand and pulled out a journal from the drawer. She grabbed the pen and opened it up to a clean page. "Okay, so why'd we call off the engagement?"_

_Emma's eyebrows scrunched together as she tried to come up with a reason, Regina doing the same. After a few minutes, Emma gave up and shrugged. "I'm sorry, babe, but I can't think of any logical reason why I would ever walk away from you." She said seriously, leaning in to place a soft kiss on Regina's lips._

" _Always the charmer." Regina whispered, pulling Emma in for another short kiss. "But I agree. I can't come up with anything remotely logical."_

" _What if we just don't give any specific details? We can be really vague and act like it's too personal." Emma offered._

_Regina nodded. "Yeah that'll work. I say, we tell the family together. They'll at least deserve that much. We won't have to worry about telling anyone else. Once we tell your parents, word will get around."_

_Emma shook her head and chuckled. "I love the fact that you threw that in there. Okay, so we'll act all distant and stuff. Ya know, avoid each other, a glance here and there, but nothing major. Then we'll have a run in at Granny's and have it out."_

_Regina hummed as she wrote down a few bullet points. "We have to pull the 'my son' card! We absolutely have to!" Regina raved._

" _Oh hell yeah! You know what? What if w-"_

" _Ma! Mom! I'm home!"_

_Regina grinned when she heard Henry's voice. "We're in our room!"_

_Emma looked at her fiancée with amusement. "I thought we weren't supposed to yell in the house."_

_Regina rolled her eyes. "Yes well, I suppose I got caught up in the excitement of informing Henry of the plan."_

_Emma snorted, leaning down to kiss Regina's nose. "Sure baby."_

_Hearing the clearing of a throat, Emma turned to see their son standing in the doorway with a fruit roll-up hanging out of his mouth. "Didn't expect to see you in this position when I came up here. If you want a few more minutes I can wait." Henry joked with a smirk._

_Emma rolled her eyes and snorted. "Trust me kid, I'd need more than a few minutes."_

" _Ugh!"_

" _Emma!" Regina chided. "Come here, Henry, we have some exciting news!" Regina said, patting the space next to her._

_Henry took off his shoes and slid onto the bed and was joined by Chance seconds later, who soon attacked Emma and Regina's faces with wet kisses._

" _So what's the news? Another vacation? Pregnant?!" Henry excitedly guessed._

" _Good guesses but not exactly. It's more of an operation." Emma said, scratching Chance's belly._

" _Operation? For what?"_

" _Well, it's more of a prank actually. We were bored today and realized that it's been a while since we've pulled a prank on Snow and we've decided on the perfect one."_

_A smile crept over Henry's face as he sat up fully. "So, what's the plan?"_

* * *

Regina had just walked into the house when a poof of white smoke appeared, revealing Emma and Henry.

"So, how did the rest of it go after I left?" Regina asked, leaning in to kiss Emma and Henry on the cheeks, before heading to the kitchen.

"Um, Mom, we may have made a miscalculation in this prank." Henry said.

Regina looked up from the coffee maker and frowned. "What do you mean?"

"So, when you left, I immediately got up to go 'check on Henry' but I was really just sitting on the steps listening in on their conversation. And one thing we didn't consider is the fact that my mom is going to attempt to get us back together, by any means necessary." Emma said with a rolled of her eyes.

"Even if it takes the whole town. And those are her words, not mine." Henry added, taking a seat at the island. "I'm guessing she's gonna come up with quite a few schemes and plots in order to get you two back together."

Regina took a moment to take all of the information in. "So what you're saying is, we're going to have a lot more fun with this than we thought?"

Emma and Henry nodded enthusiastically. "A hell of a lot more fun."


	19. Facing the Music

Emma groaned at the sound of her phone going off for the fourth time. She thought she had put it on silent last time but obviously not. She pulled the covers over her head, hoping the ringing would stop.

"Darling, if you don't stop that ringing once and for all, I'm going to light it on fire." Regina grumbled, cuddling closer to Emma.

Emma grunted and rolled over slightly to pick up the phone. She blinked several times before the screen came into focus and she could see who was calling. Ruby. What could Ruby possibly want at 9:43am on a Sunday morning? Emma half rolled her eyes as she answered the phone.

"What Ruby?" She answered, her voice thick with sleep and exhaustion.

"DON'T 'WHAT RUBY' ME! WHAT THE FUCK, EMMA?!" Ruby yelled through the phone, causing Emma to be slightly more attentive and pulling Regina from her drifting sleep.

Emma rubbed her hand over her face, trying to wake up a little more. "Number one, stop yelling. Number two, what the hell are you talking about?"

"I'm talking about the fact that your mother called me saying that you and Reggie called off the engagement! So I'll repeat myself, WHAT THE FUCK?!"

Emma grinned lazily, before responding with a big sigh. "Yeah, it's true, Rubes. Regina and I called off the wedding and we're not together anymore." Emma smirked when she heard Regina's throaty chuckle.

"What the hell, Em?! I thought things were good! Why didn't you tell me?! Are you okay? Where are you now? Are you still staying with Reggie or what?" Ruby fired off.

"Woah woah woah, one question at a time. We didn't tell anyone because it just…I don't know. You know me and Regina are pretty private people. Look, right now I just want to get some more sleep. Can we talk about this later?"

Emma heard Ruby let out a long sigh. "Yeah yeah, of course, sorry. Um, I'll talk to you later today?"

"Yeah Rubes. Talk to you later!" Emma placed the phone back on the nightstand and shook her head in amusement as she snuggled back into her giggling fiancée. "You're really enjoying this aren't you?"

Regina nodded into Emma's shoulder. "This may be the best idea you've ever had." Regina replied with another chuckle.

"Really? I thought the best idea I've ever had was deciding to spend the rest of my life with you…"

"Damn, you're right. Fine, second best idea. You know this town is about to be in an uproar over this, right?"

Emma shrugged. "At least we know they're for us and not against us."

Regina hummed in agreement.

"What's wrong?" Emma asked, noticing Regina's change in tone.

"I'm about to get sappy…"

Emma snorted and began rubbing circles on Regina's shoulders. "I love sappy Regina. Go for it."

Regina sighed and relaxed into Emma's tough. "As hilarious as I think this is, and trust me, I find it utterly hysterical, the thought of not being with you anymore almost kills me."

Emma pulled Regina closer and pressed a soft kiss to her forehead. "I guess we're both sappy then cause it kills me a little more every time I say it. I could never imagine being without you. You're my sun and my moon."

"My sunrise and my sunset." Regina said softly.

"My east and my west."

"My north and my south."

"My infinity."

"My eternity." Regina finished, pulling Emma impossibly closer while letting out a groan. "Can we just stay like this all day?"

Emma grinned at the thought of spending all day cuddled up with the love of her life. "I mean, I'm not opposed. I see no reason why we can't."

Their moment of bliss was cut by the sound of the doorbell ringing consistently.

"Who the hell could that be?" Regina grumbled.

"It better not be Ruby…" Emma said.

Both women continued to groan as the doorbell continued to ring. "Rock, paper, scissors? Loser gets up." Regina suggested.

"Or we can just wait for Henry to finally get up and get it." Emma countered.

"Dear, our son sleeps like a rock. I don't think he'll be getting up any time soon." Regina joked.

Just then the ringing stopped and they soon heard a familiar voice. "Regina?!"

"Belle?"

"Is that Belle?"

Regina hopped up and shoved Emma out of the bed.

"Wha-What the hell, Regina?" Emma shrieked from the floor.

"Shhhh! We're not supposed to be together anymore, remember?!" Regina reminded her.

"Oh hell, I forgot!" Emma said with wide eyes.

Their eyes widened when they heard a knock on the bedroom door. "Regina? I know you're here, your car is outside. I used my key to get in, come on and open the door."

"Uh-yeah, Belle give me a second." Regina called out. She made eye contact with Emma and frantically pointed to the closet. Emma scampered towards the closet, falling over the bed sheet on the way.

"Regina, are you okay?!" Belle asked through the door.

Regina rolled her eyes at Emma as the blonde closed the doors to the closet with a grimace. "Yes, I'm fine, Belle." Regina answered, finally opening the door.

As soon as the door opened, Belle engulfed her friend in a tight hug. "Oh Regina, I'm so sorry. Snow called and told me the news. I came right over."

Regina sank into the hug immediately. "Thank you, Belle. But I'm fine, I promise." She assured, pulling back from the hug and taking a seat on the bed.

Belle scoffed and rolled her eyes. "Mhmm, just like you said you were fine with serving bear claws at the wedding reception?"

Regina grimaced knowing Emma could hear their conversation. It's not that she wasn't okay with it, it was just…she didn't understand her fiancée's obsession with the sugary treat. "I am okay with it, Belle. I mean, I was. I just don't get what's so good about them."

Belle nodded in understanding. "I know what you mean. I mean, they're good, but not that good. But on to more important things, what happened? I thought everything was going great between you two?"

Regina sighed, putting on her best dejected face. "I honestly couldn't tell you, Belle. I mean, everything just became too much for both of us. It wasn't just one thing, it was multiple things. I suppose we just got tired of trying to pretend everything was okay."

Belle nodded slowly. "So it was mutual? The break up, I mean."

Regina nodded. "We were sitting in the bed one night and we decided that we would talk about everything that was bothering us. One thing led to another and the next thing you know we were screaming at each other and calling everything off." Regina hoped Emma would be okay with the small details she'd decided to add to their break-up story.

"Are you sure it's actually over? There's no way you two could fix everything? I really believe that you two belong together, Gi." Belle said, hope in her tone.

Regina shrugged. "I don't know, Belle. We said some things to each other that two people should never say to one another. I once believed that we belonged together as well, but things change."

"So, Emma is moving out soon?" Belle asked.

"Yes. I'm not sure where to though. She didn't come home last night so I guess she found somewhere else to stay. A lot of her stuff is still here so she'll be coming back to get it eventually." Regina said, piling on lie after lie. She really hoped Emma was keeping up with their storyline because they would definitely need to go over it when Belle left.

Belle looked at Regina sympathetically. "You're worried, aren't you?"

Regina let her shoulders sag and laid back on the bed. "Just because we're not together anymore doesn't mean I don't necessarily care about her well-being."

Belle nodded, knowing exactly how that felt. "And how is Henry dealing with all of this?" She asked.

"Well he definitely isn't happy with how things have played out. He hasn't really talked to either of us since we told him. That's the part that hurts the most, I guess. But he'll come around eventually." Regina shrugged again.

Belle fell back on the bed next to Regina and let out a long sigh. "How can you be so blasé about this? I mean from what Ruby told me, Emma was pretty blasé about it too."

"Belle, both Emma and I have learned that sometimes things don't last. Especially good things. We've both conditioned ourselves to withstand a lot and this is just another one of those things." Regina said, turning her head to look towards the closet doors. Saying these things was killing her and all she wanted was to be with Emma right now.

Belle grabbed Regina's hand, gaining the brunette's attention. "Do you need anything? Need me to go grocery shopping for you? Want me to step in for you as Mayor for a while?"

Regina shook her head. "No no, Belle, of course not!"

"Are you sure? No one is expecting you to be 100% okay after something like this. People will understand if you just want some time to yourself for a while." Belle assured.

Regina shook her head again. "No, I promise I'll be okay, Belle. And the minute I need a day off, you'll be the first one I call."

Belle nodded and slowly stood up. "Okay then. Well I'll leave you alone, give you some time to yourself. But please call me if you need anything. Maybe we can do a late lunch? Say around 2 o'clock?"

Regina smiled, reaching out for Belle to pull her up off of the bed. "Sounds perfect! Come on, I'll walk you downstairs."

After seeing Belle off, Regina returned upstairs to see Emma standing in front of their bed giving a slow clap.

"You, my lady, deserve an Oscar for that performance." Emma said, with a grin.

Regina rolled her eyes at her fiancée's antics. "Really? You don't think I went too far? I mean, I just sort of came up with minor details on the spot but-"

"Babe, you did awesome! You kept it simple and the details you gave were totally believable. And throwing in the fact that I didn't come home last night? Genius! Completely something I would do." Emma reassured, pulling Regina onto the bed. "But there's something more important we need to discuss." Emma said, face becoming serious.

Regina raised an eyebrow as she straddled Emma's lap. "Which is?"

"You 'don't get what's so good about bear claws'? What the hell, Regina?!"

* * *

Standing outside of Granny's, Emma took a deep breath as she put on her game face. It hadn't even been a full day since she and Regina had told her parents about the break up, and already the entire town knew. What was even worse was that she, Regina, and Henry were having a blast coming up with different reactions and fights to have when people asked them about the situation. Emma shook her head and opened the door to Granny's. As expected, everyone stopped and stared for a while. Some looked angry and some looked sad. It was a split down the middle. Emma rolled her eyes and headed to the counter to take a seat.

"So, what the hell happened?" Ruby asked, jumping right to the point and sitting a hot chocolate with cinnamon in front of the blonde.

Emma shrugged. "I don't know, Rubes. We just…didn't work."

Ruby rolled her eyes as she came around the counter to sit next to Emma. "Em…you know I don't believe that. Something must have happened. Did she do something? Did you do something? What happened?"

"I-I honestly don't know. We just couldn't do it anymore. We stopped talking, we haven't had sex in I don't know when, we argue about everything, I mean the list goes on and on, Rubes. One night we're sitting in bed and we decided to finally discuss everything, ya know finally get everything out in the open. One thing led to another and the next thing you know we're screaming at each other and calling off everything." Emma shrugged again. "And that was that."

Ruby let out a whistle at the information. "Wow. That's…wow. So what's the deal, now? Where are you staying?"

"Well, I'm moving out at some point. I just haven't found a place yet, and I don't really wanna go back to living with my parents."

Ruby frowned at this. "So where did you stay last night?"

"I just stayed in my car." Emma said with another shrug.

Ruby's mouth dropped open in shock. "Wha-Why?"

"Well, I didn't really have anywhere else to go. Technically I was gonna stay with Regina until I found a place, but I just…things were really tense last night after we told my parents so I wasn't really in the mood for going back to the mansion." Emma confided.

Ruby stared at Emma for a solid twenty-three seconds before slapping the blonde in the back of the head.

"Ow! What the heck, bro?!" Emma yelped.

"You're an idiot, dude! First of all, if things were tense between you and Reggie after telling your folks, it was probably because she was hurting. Ya know, dealing with the fact that things are over? You should have talked to her! Secondly, you know damn well you could have stayed with me and Z!" Ruby scolded.

Emma bit back a grin. Leave it to Ruby to dish out the touch love. "Rubes, I highly doubt Regina would have wanted to talk to me, and I definitely didn't want to talk to her. And I didn't want to bother you guys or anything."

Ruby shook her head vigorously. "Nope, you're staying with us now. Z will be on my side with this too so don't even try to fight it." Ruby argued.

"Wha-No no no, Ruby really, I don't need to stay with you guys! I'll be fine!"

"Nope nope nope! You're staying with us now and there's nothing you can do or say that'll change my mind. You've done so much for me and for Z and we owe you. Plus, you're family! Now bring it in, dude." Ruby leaned forward and wrapped Emma in a tight hug.

Emma let out a sigh as she hugged Ruby back. This was not a part of the plan. The plan was that she would tell everyone she moved out but never actually do it. I guess it would have eventually looked weird if she never actually had a place of her own, but they didn't get that far in the planning this morning because they ended up getting distracted. _Ugh, damn us and our horniness. Regina is not gonna like this._ Emma was pulled out of her thoughts when she heard the bell over the door ring and the diner went silent. She didn't even need to turn around to know that Regina, Zelena, and Belle had walked in. It was all a part of their plan. Belle and Regina had already made plans to meet for lunch, but then Zelena had called shortly after, demanding that she and Regina talk and get down to the bottom of what happened, so therefore all three of them were having lunch together. Henry would show up later with her parents, they'd make a scene, she and Regina would leave, and then Henry would meet them back at home later.

"Don't look now but Regina just walked in." Ruby whispered, pulling away from the hug.

Not taking Ruby's advice, Emma turned around and watched as Regina, Zelena, and Belle took a seat at a made eye contact with Zelena and watched as the redhead sat her purse down and made her way over towards them.

"Hello darling." Zelena greeted Ruby, placing a kiss on her lips.

"Hey babe. Where's Robyn?" Ruby asked.

"She's having a playdate with Neal." Zelena replied. She turned to Emma and looked at the blonde with a sympathetic sigh. "And how are you doing, Savior?" She asked sincerely.

Emma rolled her eyes and scoffed. "I'd be doing a lot better if you stopped calling me that." She said with a teasing smile.

Zelena grinned. "Ah, now you know that'll never happen." She retorted, her smile widening when Emma rolled her eyes again. "On to more pressing matters, Regina informed me that you didn't come home last night. Is that true?"

When Emma nodded, Zelena immediately slapped the blonde in the back of the head.

"Ow! Why do you guys keep doing that?! What the hell was that for?!" Emma yelled, rubbing the back of her head. She was gonna need to stop by the hospital if they kept this up.

"That, duckling, is for not calling Red and I last night. You know you could have stayed with us!" Zelena reprimanded.

Ruby smirked. "Don't worry, Green. I already told her she was staying with us. No questions asked." Ruby said, before giving Zelena a kiss on the cheek and heading over to talk to Belle and Regina.

"Still think it's weird that you guys call each other by colors." Emma grumbled.

"Nice to know." Zelena said, taking Ruby's seat next to Emma. "Now, tell me, how are you really doing?"

Emma rolled her eyes again. She was really going to get tired of hearing this question. "I'm fine, Zelena I promise."

"Duckling…tell me the truth."

"Lena, I promise I'm okay. Right now you need to be worried about Regina, alright? She needs you more than I do right now." Emma assured.

Zelena shook her head and grabbed Emma's hand gently. "Hear me, and hear me well when I say that I am not taking sides, okay? I understand that you and little one have called off your relationship, but under no circumstances does that mean that our relationship is anywhere near over. You are still one of my best friends and more importantly, whether you and Regina are together or not, You. Are. My. Sister. Is that understood?" Zelena asked softly.

Emma nodded, knowing she couldn't have answered without her voice wavering from emotions. _Damn Zelena and her calling me her sister and her best friend. Where the hell does she get off?_

"Good. Now, come here and give your big sis some good old fashioned love." Zelena said, holding her arms out for a hug which Emma readily accepted.

"Hey Swan, ease off my woman! You literally JUST got divorced, and I don't think Regina would be too pleased with you joining in on this Christmas party." Ruby sassed, approaching the two.

Emma frowned. "Okay first of all, Regina and I never even got married so it can't be called a divorce. Secondly, I don't get the Christmas reference."

Zelena rolled her eyes. "I guess that blonde stereotype is pretty accurate sometimes." Zelena said, pecking Ruby on the cheek and heading back to her table.

"Wow, your wife is rude." Emma said, shaking her head and turning back to her hot chocolate.

"Woah! Girlfriend, sweet cheeks, girlfriend. Unlike you and Reggie, some couples like to take their time." Ruby joked, wincing when she remembered Emma's current situation. "Dang it, I'm sorry Em. I didn't mean to hit a sore spot. I guess it's gonna take me some time to get used to the fact that you and Reggie aren't together anymore. I'm really sorry."

Emma shook her head, waving Ruby off. "Don't apologize, dude. I have to admit you're right though. Maybe if Regina and I would have taken our time and not skipped a lot of steps, things would have worked out better." Emma gritted her teeth and took a deep breath. Saying those words actually made her nauseous.

Ruby patted Emma on the back. "Maybe things can still work out. Just give it some time. Speaking of things working out, how the hell is my nephew handling all of this?"

"He's uh- not handling it too well. He hasn't spoken to me or Regina since we told Him."

Ruby let out a long breath. "Man that's tough. How are you feeling about that?"

Emma shrugged. "I'm obviously not ecstatic about it, but I also know he'll come around. Hopefully. He has every right to be upset and I'm going to give him time to be. I know Regina isn't handling it too well. You know she hates it when Henry is mad at her."

Ruby nodded. "Yeah, she mentioned it when I went over to talk to her. I hope he'll come around soon. Want another hot chocolate?"

Emma nodded. "Please."

"Anything else?"

A mischievous smirk spread across Emma's face. "Yeah actually. Give me a double-decker, bacon cheeseburger. Extra cheese and bacon. No onions or leaves or tomatoes or junk. Everything else though. French fries AND onion rings on the side. And a chocolate milkshake." Emma listed off. Regina was gonna kill her for this, but right now Regina couldn't yell at her. Therefore, she was gonna milk this opportunity. "Oh and can I have that to-go please?"

"Dude, you haven't ordered like this in a while." Ruby commented, still writing down the order.

"Yeah well, that's because her majesty was supervising my meals to make sure they were healthy. She was holding me back from my true potential, but I'm a free woman right now, Rubes, and this woman will eat what she pleases." Emma declared.

"Ruby!"

Ruby's eyes widened at the sound of Granny calling for her. "And that means I've been out here for too long. I'll be back with that."

Emma felt eyes burning into her back, so she turned her head slightly only to see Regina to be the one directing the glare at her. She bit back a grin and pulled out her phone.

 **Knight In Tight Pants:** What?

 **Queen of S(ass):** You know what.

 **Knight In Tight Pants:** Humor me

 **Queen of S(ass):** What did you just order?

 **Knight In Tight Pants:** Food.

 **Queen of S(ass):** If you don't want a fireball thrown at your head right now, you'll answer me correctly.

 **Knight In Tight Pants:** Do it. You won't.

 **Queen of S(ass):** Are you challenging me?

 **Knight In Tight Pants:** Always baby

 **Knight In Tight Pants:** And you know you like it

 **Queen of S(ass):** Good luck paying for your meal without your wallet.

Emma's eyes widened as she felt around for her wallet. She knows she had it in her back pocket, which means…

 **Knight In Tight Pants:** I can't believe you magically stole my wallet.

 **Knight In Tight Pants:** I'm telling.

Emma scrolled through her messages finding the group chat she was looking for.

 **SaveThis:** Henry! Your mother is being mean. Reprimand her.

 **RegalQueen:** Surprising. I wasn't aware you knew that word. Someone's been looking at Henry's vocabulary words.

 **(Author)ized** : Mom, why are you 'being mean'?

 **RegalQueen:** Your other mother has taken it upon herself to order enough food for five people.

 **(Author)ized** : Ma….

 **SaveThis:** Pfft! What kind of dramatization?!

 **SaveThis:** It's nowhere near that much food.

 **RegalQueen:** On a roll with the big words.

 **SaveThis:** Henry she stole my wallet!

 **SaveThis:** STEALING IS WRONG!

 **RegalQueen:** Says the woman who stole that yellow coffin on wheels.

 **(Author)ized** : truuuuu

 **SaveThis:** Kid!

 **(Author)ized** : Love you Ma!

 **SaveThis:** And that's a lotta lip coming from someone who basically stole hearts for a living. I guess I shouldn't be surprised by this behavior.

 **(Author)ized** : truuuu

 **RegalQueen:** Henry!

 **(Author)ized** : Love you Mom!

 **RegalQueen:** Can't believe you tattled on me to our son.

 **RegalQueen:** Weak.

 **SaveThis:** Fight me.

 **(Author)ized** : Save it for the actual fight

 **(Author)ized** : Speaking of, we're right outside Granny's

 **(Author)ized** : Showtime! Love you guys!

 **RegalQueen:** Love you too, my Prince!

 **SaveThis:** Love you too, kid!

* * *

"Regina, are you okay?"

Regina looked up from her phone to see her sister and Belle looking at her with concerned eyes. "Yes, I'm fine. I was just…taking care of a few things for work. Replying to some emails." She lied.

All three woman looked towards the door when they heard the bell ring. Snow, David, and Henry entered the diner. Henry looked excited to be there, that is until he noticed that his mothers were in the diner, and his expression hardened instantly. Henry huffed and turned towards his grandparents.

"Can we leave? I don't want to be around them." He declared, loud enough to gain everyone's attention.

"Oh Henry, you don't mean that!" Snow said, placing a comforting hand on her grandson's shoulder.

"Yeah I do. I'll be around them when they can talk to each other like normal. Until then, I don't want any part of them." Henry challenged.

Everyone in the diner looked between Regina and Emma, waiting for one of them to make the first move. Finally David cleared his throat. "Well…?" He urged, motioning for Emma and Regina to get moving. Both women rolled their eyes as they got up slowly, avoiding eye contact with one another. They both met right in front of Henry, facing each other but still refusing to make eye contact.

"Sheriff Swan."

"Mayor Mills."

Henry, Emma, and Regina all swallowed a grin when the entire diner let out a collective groan. Emma rolled her eyes and continued on. "There, we talked. Now, can you cut the attitude? It's getting old, kid." Emma said, looking at Henry.

"Are you kidding me? You guys didn't even look at each other! And drop the titles, this isn't a business meeting." He said, gaining a lot of agreements from their audience.

Regina cleared her throat as she crossed her arms and fixed Emma with a blank stare. Emma did the same.

"Miss Swan."

"Miss Mills."

"I see you've gone back to your gluttonous ways. Eating yourself into an early grave." Regina quipped, gesturing to Emma's food that was now sitting on the counter.

"I see you're back to minding everyone's business but your own."

"That's pretty rich. Especially coming from someone whose mother is literally the town gossip."

Emma had to bite the inside of her cheek in order to keep herself from laughing at her mother's shocked facial expression.

"Wow that's pretty sad, Madam Mayor. Can't come after me without coming after my mom? Weak."

"Oh I have a plethora of things I could come after you for, Sheriff. A list of grievances that would take me weeks to get through." Regina snarled.

"Oh yeah? I guess it's too bad I don't care about your opinion huh Queenie? See that's your problem Regina, you think I'm scared of you, but I can assure you, I'm not." Emma said through gritted teeth, taking a step into Regina's personal space.

"Well that proves that you're a bigger idiot than I thought you were. You have no idea what I'm capable of, Miss Swan." Regina growled, getting into Emma personal space as well.

"I know exactly what you're capable of and that's exactly why I'm not afraid of you." Emma challenged.

"Okay enough!" Henry shouted. "You two sound like petulant children!"

"Says the child." Emma mumbled.

"I may be a child but I'm acting more adult than you two are right now." Henry argued.

"Oh really? Sulking around the house? Not talking to us ever since we told you about the break up? Being a little shit? Yeah real adult stuff, kid. So mature." Emma countered.

"Excuse you, you will not talk to my son like that!" Regina barked, both of her hands on her hips.

Emma's head whipped around quickly. "No, excuse you! He's my son too! Actually, he was my son first!"

"Say one more thing and I'll be sure to show you exactly what I'm capable of." Regina growled.

"Do it. You won't." Emma fumed, through gritted teeth.

"Are you challenging me, Sheriff?"

"Always, Madam Mayor." Emma said with a dangerous glint in her eyes.

"Well, challenge fucking accepted." Regina hissed, before disappearing in a cloud of purple smoke.

Emma let out an aggravated growl before heading to the counter to grab her food, ignoring all of the eyes that were on her. She summoned some money and left it on the counter before vanishing in a cloud of white smoke.

"Well," Henry said, letting out a loud sigh. "At least they're talking now."


	20. Let's Devise A Plan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The aftermath of Regina and Emma's "fight".
> 
> Emma, Regina, and Henry come up with a plan to set things in motion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been forever and seven days but HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! I hope that you can forgive me for leaving you! Life got rough and chaotic, but I'm back now and so are your favorite characters! Enjoy!

Regina rolled her eyes when Emma appeared in the kitchen with her to-go bag of food.

“Of course you took out time to get that.” Regina said, making her way towards the blonde.

Emma grinned and started unpacking the bag. “Well, I ordered it, so it would have been dumb and sad to leave it behind.” She said, waving a french fry in Regina’s face. “Want one?”

Regina bit the fry and shoved Emma to the side. “What kind of heart attack did you order anyway?” She asked, unpacking the rest of the bag.

“Oh come on, Gina. It’s not that bad. I just got a few things.” Emma defends, reaching for the bag, only to get her hand slapped away.

“Onion rings, french fries, a burger with three slices of cheese, extra bacon, two patties, no lettuce, or tomatoes, or anything remotely healthy. And,” Regina paused to pick up the to-go cup and took a sip. “And a chocolate milkshake? What do you have to say for yourself?” Regina finished, crossing her arms and fixing Emma with a blank expression.

“Oh drop the act, Gina. You know we’re gonna sit down, split this burger, and eat lunch. So go ahead and get the ketchup out of the fridge and I’ll put the food on the table.” Emma responded, crossing her arms as well.

They stood there in a staring contest, before Regina’s shoulders slumped and she rolled her eyes. “I hate you. You know before I met you, I was a lot more unpredictable.”

Emma snorted and kissed Regina’s cheek. “Sure baby.” She grabbed the food and took it to the table as Regina pouted her way to the fridge.

“Did you hear how agitated everyone got when we called each other Sheriff and Mayor?” Regina asked with a smug grin as she sat down at the table.

Emma laughed and shook her head. “Babe, they were so over it. I’m actually extremely proud of myself for holding it together. Did you see the look on Leroy’s face? He was livid.”

Regina snorted as she grabbed a few fries. “Isn’t he always? Ruby rolled her eyes so hard I thought they were going to roll out of her head. I saw your small grin when I mentioned your mother.” She said, her grin growing at the mention of Snow.

Emma chuckled. “I definitely wasn’t surprised when you took a jab at her, but it was still super funny. By the look on her face I could tell she was offended.”

“Well good, that was the goal.” Regina said, her smug grin showing just how proud of herself she was.

They sat in a comfortable silence as they continued to eat their food, Regina enjoying her burger and Emma slowly panicking. She had to figure out how to tell Regina that Ruby and Zelena expected her to move in with them. _Ugh, this is not gonna go over well. Shit._ Emma sighed.

Regina looked at Emma and frowned. “What’s wrong? You’ve got your thinking face on.”

Emma sighed again. _Okay here we go._ “So…I may or may not have some bad news and you can’t get mad.” Emma stated, avoiding eye contact with her fiancée.

Regina narrowed her eyes as she took a sip of the milkshake. “I’ll make no promises…but I will attempt to respond calmly.” Regina offered.

Emma took a deep breath and looked up at brown eyes. “So, remember when we added to the story that I never came home last night?” Regina nodded. “Well, Rubes and Lena were pretty pissed about that, so now, according to them, I’ll be staying with them until I find my own place.”

“The hell you will!” Regina exclaimed.

Emma winced at the outburst. “What happened to you responding calmly?”

“Well I didn’t make any promises! Emma, what the hell?!” Regina got up and began to pace. “Okay, so what, you’re supposed to be staying over there tonight?”

Emma shrugged. “Technically? Yes. But honestly? I don’t plan on going.”

Regina stopped pacing and turned towards Emma. “Oh…okay. So, you want to tell everyone the truth?”

Emma shook her head. “Well, no, but I also don’t want to be away from you so…I don’t know.”

Regina nodded slowly, processing their situation. “Okay, let’s really think about this. Logically, we should just tell everyone the truth and go about our lives. Correct?” Regina asked, her shoulders slumping at just the mention of their fun being over.

Emma made a face of disgust and shook her head. “I mean, yeah if you wanna be logical about it, but that’s so boring! That’s lame, babe! We’ve been living our lives like two elderly ladies lately! Having dinner at seven, watching tv at eight, and being in bed by nine! That’s ridiculous! This is the first time we’ve had any kind of fun in weeks, and I don’t think either one of us really wants to throw in the towel now.” Emma finished with a sigh.

Regina nodded. Emma was definitely right. She doesn’t know how but over the past few weeks she and Emma had eased into having early nights and boring weekends. It seemed that they were so content with each other’s presence that it led to them just…lying in bed watching bad Hallmark movies. "So then, what are we going to do? You know those two, Em, they'll hunt you down if you don't show up." 

Emma bit her lip. She knew Regina was right. But what else could they do? It's not like she can clone herself or something. 

_Wait._

"Okay I have an idea but I need you to keep an open mind. Okay? Open mind, Gina." 

Regina rolled her eyes. "I always have an open mind, dear." 

Emma snorted. "Yeah okay, sure. So, hear me out. We have magic, right? So why don't we just clone me and the-"  

"No. Absolutely not." Regina protested, sitting back down at the table and resuming her meal. 

"I thought you said you'd keep an open mind!" 

"My mind is open. I just know the answer to that is a definite no. It's not an option." Regina said, leaving no room for discussion. 

Emma, however, disregarded Regina's attempt at ending the conversation. "What do you mean it's not an option? Come on, Gi! It could totally work! We could like, clone me or whatever, which I know there has to be a spell for, and then we can just send the copy to stay with Ruby and Zelena. You know it'll work."

Regina regarded Emma for a while before shaking her head. "Absolutely not." 

Emma crossed her arms in defiance and frowned. "Give me one good reason why it wouldn't work." 

"It just won't." Regina said, as she turned to her food and took a bite of her burger. 

Emma shook her head. "No, I'm gonna need more than that, cause this is actually a good plan and I think we could pull it off. So unless you have a legitimate reason, we're either going to do it or we'll have to stop the prank all together." 

"There are too many variables of things that could go wrong when it comes to cloning. It's just too risky." Regina said, not looking at Emma. 

Emma narrowed her eyes as she looked at Regina. She could spot the lie miles away. Plus Regina kept avoiding eye contact which was a dead giveaway. "You're lying."

Regina rolled her eyes and continued focusing on her food. "Everything I said was true. There are risks when it comes to cloning." 

"Yeah, uh-huh. I'm sure that's true, but that's not the reason you don't want to do it. You know I'm gonna get it out of you eventually, so you might as well just tell me now." 

Regina let out a long sigh. _Damn that superpower. I can't get away with anything._ "Fine. I don't want to go through with the cloning because..." Regina mumbled the rest of the sentence under her breath while continuing to avoid eye contact with Emma. 

Emma squinted and leaned forward, trying to make out what Regina said. "I'm sorry babe, I didn't catch that. A little louder for the people in the back." Emma teased. 

Regina groaned as she put her head in her hands. "I said I don't want two of you walking around here."  

Emma frowned. "Babe, I know I can be a handful sometimes, but I'm pretty sure we could keep the other me under control."

Regina groaned again and ran a hand through her hair. "It's not that, it's just...” Regina gestured wildly. "You know."

Emma shook her head. "Baby, don't take this the wrong way, but you're usually really good at the whole talking thing and right now you're doing a pretty bad job at it." Emma teased.

Regina sighed and finally looked at Emma. "You have to promise me you won't make a big deal out of this. Okay?" Emma nodded. "Having another you here would be too distracting for me."

Emma's frown deepened. "Regina, I promise I can keep her out of trouble and-" 

"No, Emma that's not what I mean." Regina groaned in frustration. "Emma, how would you feel if I cloned myself?" Regina asked. 

Emma smiled instantly. "Oh my God Regina, I would fucking love that! Two of you walking around town all sexy and cute? One of you could just sit on my desk all day while I work! Ugh god, I'd never get any work done. Could you imagine the sex? I mean, reall-" Emma stopped when she saw the look on Regina's face. Then it clicked. 

"Oh. _OH_!!!" A smirk spread across Emma's face and she wiggled her eyebrows. "It'd be too distracting because you'd wanna fuck me." Emma said, her smirk growing into a grin. "Both of me." 

Regina groaned and returned to her meal, not even bothering to respond. 

"You'd wanna cuddle with two of me and sleep with two of me and have lunch with two of me and you'd wanna watch us work out and do push-ups and stuff." Emma teased, her eyebrows wiggling way more than necessary. Emma dragged her chair closer to Regina until they were side by side. She slung her arm on the back of Regina's chair and fixed the brunette with a silly grin. "You like me." 

Regina snorted. "Hardly."

Emma poked Regina's side playfully. "You like me. I can tell when you're lying, Regina." She said, her grin growing goofier. 

"Well, it seems as if you need to get that superpower of yours checked out." Regina replied, trying hard to repress a grin. 

Emma hummed as she got up from the table to get an ink pen. Regina watched as Emma took a napkin and scribbled something down on it and then slid it towards her. Regina rolled her eyes and smiled when she read the note. 

 

**_Do you like me?_ **

**_Circle yes or no._ **

 

Regina took the pen and circled yes, then slid it back over to Emma. 

"Yes! I knew it!" Emma exclaimed, fist pumping excessively, causing Regina to giggle. 

"Why must you be like this?" Regina asked, shaking her head with a fond smile.

Emma grinned as she leaned over to kiss Regina on the cheek. "Because you love it."

Regina grinned and pecked Emma on the lips. "I really do." 

Emma grinned and tapped Regina's nose with her finger, causing the brunette's grin to widen. "So, what are we gonna do? We can’t clone me because apparently I'm irresistible, so we have to come up with another plan. Any ideas?" 

Regina rolled her eyes but said nothing. She has no idea what they were going to do. They hadn't really thought this far ahead. They'd both just been looking forward to the sneaking around and the fake arguments. _Wait...sneaking around..._  

"Sneaking around..." 

Emma frowned. "Huh?" 

Regina shook her head from her thoughts and looked at Emma. "You have to go stay with them." Regina said, causing Emma to frown.

"Wait, what? I don't wanna!" 

Regina shook her head. "I know but listen, remember how we said we wanted to sneak around with each other?" Emma nodded. "Well how are we supposed to do that if you're here?" 

Emma's eyes widened and she grinned. "Oh my God, you're fucking right! Babe, that would be so fun!"

Regina’s smiled widened. "And we could find different places to meet up around town!"

"Oh hell yeah! Gina, this is gonna be so f-" 

Emma was cut off by the sound of her cell phone ringing. She pulled it out to see who it was. 

"Who is it?" Regina asked looking over to see the screen. 

"It's Ruby, wait I'll put it on speaker." Emma swiped the phone, answering it. "Hello?" 

"Hey Em, where are you? You left Granny's pretty fast after the fight. I figured I'd give a chance to cool down. You okay?" Ruby said, her voice carrying out through the room. 

"Oh, yeah Rubes, I'm good. Thanks for checking in." Emma said. 

"You sure dude? I mean, that was intense. I haven't seen the two of you go at it like that in a while." Ruby said. 

Emma smiled as she watched Regina try to hold in her giggle. "Yeah I'm sure, Rubes. You know Regina is good at getting under my skin. Nothing I can't handle though. She's all bark and no bite." Emma said, trying to sound indifferent. 

Regina raised a challenging eyebrow at Emma's words, which made Emma grin. 

"Plus she's tiny so she can't do any real damage." Emma added, her grin growing as Regina fixed her with a fake glare. 

Ruby laughter carried through the phone breaking the playful stare down the two women were having. "Dude, don't let her hear you say that. Regina may be tiny but she's mighty. Anyway, when are you coming over? Do you need help getting your stuff from Reggie's?" 

Emma quickly moved forward to place her hand over Regina's mouth before the brunette could complain about the nickname.

"Um, no I don't need help. I can go get it myself. Are you sure it's okay if I stay with you guys?" Emma asked. 

"Yeah of course it's cool, Em! Granny gave me the rest of the day off so Green, Robyn, and I are gonna spend the evening out of town. We’ll be back later on tonight at about nine or ten, then Green is gonna head over to Reggie's. She's gonna stay over there for a while, you know, make sure Reggie's okay and stuff." Ruby said. 

Emma let go of Regina and looked at the brunette with wide eyes. "Um, does Regina know that Lena is coming over?"

Ruby chuckled. "Of course not. You know Green wouldn't call ahead, you know she likes the element of surprise." She said. “Oh, and we left a key under the mat so you can get in the house whenever you're ready.”

"Uh, well okay cool cool. Then I’ll make sure to get my stuff from Her Majesty before you guys get back." Emma said. 

"You sure you don't need our help? After that fight the two of you had, you might need a mediator or something." Ruby said, sounding worried. 

Emma bit her lip as she tried to suppress her grin. "Nah I'm good Rubes. Plus, this is something I need to do on my own. I'll be good. Plus I want to try to talk to Henry before I leave." 

"Oh yeah, good call. And you know he has his own room at our place so he can always come over and stuff." Ruby said. 

"Thanks Rubes. You guys have fun! Wish me luck." 

Ruby chuckled. "We will! And don't worry, I'm sure Reggie won't give you too much trouble." 

Emma sighed. "We'll see. Thanks Ruby, I'll see you later." Emma looked at Regina as she pressed the "End Call" button. 

"Why does she insist on calling me that?" Regina asked as soon as Emma ended the call. 

Emma shook her head and grinned. "Really? Is that what you're focusing on right now? And we all know you love it. You just like to put up a fight." Emma said knowingly. 

Regina folded her arms and sniffed. "I don't know what you're talking about." She said, trying to keep her smile at bay. 

Emma rolled her eyes and grinned. "So, according to Ruby, we have,” Emma looked down at her watch. **4:27pm**. “at least four hours before your sister gets here and before I need to be at their place. Any ideas of what we can do with that time?" Emma asked, wiggling her eyebrows. 

Regina smirked as she stood up and pulled Emma by her shirt. "I have a few ideas."

* * *

 

Regina sighed happily as she stood at the kitchen sink drying the dishes from dinner. The evening had been perfect. She and Emma got a chance to have some alone time, which meant they could have sex as loud as they wanted to and not have to worry about making the room soundproof. It also meant that they could have sex around the house instead of just in the bedroom, which is always refreshing. They had gone several rounds before they decided to shower and start preparing dinner for the night. Henry had shown up 20 minutes into them preparing the lasagna. They'd discussed the new layout of the prank. According to Henry, Snow and David were planning an intervention at the end of the week, so that gave them plenty of time to have some fun and come up with reasons to argue and be dramatic. Regina suggested that Henry stay with Snow and David in order to stay up to date on their plans. Emma would stay over at Ruby's and Zelena's for the week, and then they would all attend the intervention and let everyone know it was a joke. Henry had protested, saying that they should keep it going longer, but Emma had insisted (dramatically) that she'd die if she had to be away from Regina any longer than that. Regina chuckled, remembering how Emma had clutched her chest and grimaced when Henry asked if she was willing to stay at Ruby and Zelena's place for another week.

Regina sighed as she thought about what was next to come. Emma had taken off about 20 minutes ago to go meet Ruby, which meant Zelena would be showing up at any minute. Regina groaned as she heard the front door open. 

_Speak of the devil._

"Oh dear sister of mine! Your favorite person in the world is here to make your life better!" Regina rolled her eyes as she heard her sister closing the front door.

"Henry is my favorite person." Regina stated, putting away the last plate and turning to look at Zelena. 

Zelena waved her hand in indifference. "I suppose I'm willing to take second place to my nephew. Where is the little apple anyway?" Zelena asked, heading to the refrigerator. 

"He's at Snow and David's, and he took the dog with him. Apparently, they'll come back when Miss Swan and I 'clean up our acts'. The real question is, what are you doing here? And why do you have luggage?" Regina asked, as if she didn't already know the answer. 

Zelena snorted as she pulled out the container of leftover lasagna. "And when will that be?" She asked, getting a fork and digging in, not bothering to heat it up. 

Regina's face scrunched up in disgust. "When will what be? And would it kill you to use a plate?" She asked. 

"When will you and Emma clean up your act? Because I've got a baby and girlfriend to get home to." Zelena said, ignoring Regina's insistence on a plate and continuing to eat. 

Regina rolled her eyes and grabbed two glasses and the bottle of wine that she had been planning to open for the night. "There is no act to clean up. Miss Swan and I are no longer together and it's going to stay that way. And I didn't ask you to be here in the first place, so why exactly are you here, Zelena? Since you didn't answer my question the first time." She said, handing Zelena a glass of wine.

Zelena took her glass of wine and container of lasagna and headed to the living room, motioning for Regina to follow her. "Well my darling sister, I'm here to help you through this rough time obviously. You're doing a great job of hiding it, but I know you're in distress and that your heart is broken into a million pieces but worry not! I'm going to help you build yourself back up, and then I'm going to help you get your Swan back!" Zelena assured, taking a seat on the couch. 

Regina rolled her eyes and took a seat as well. "Zelena, I am not in distress and my heart is not broken. Miss Swan and I both chose to terminate our relationship and that's the way it's going to stay. I'm rather happy not having her around anymore. I don't need another child to take care of and frankly, she’s insufferable. I honestly don’t know how I put up with her for as long as I did." Regina responded, internally screaming at the thought of actually not having Emma around anymore. 

Zelena rolled her eyes as she took another bite of her food. "Bloody hell, could you please stop calling her that? Her name is Emma! And I know you don't really mean that. I know the two of you, which means I know that you all are still madly in love with each other. Whatever happened to make the two of you break up is no match for the love that you have for one another. When it passes, and it will, the two of you will realize how stupid you're being." Zelena stated knowingly. "But until then, I'll be here, by your side, helping you get through it."

Regina swallowed thickly at her sister's words. It really meant a lot to her that Zelena was willing to be there for her. She'd have never expected that her sister would end up becoming one of her best friends and one of the people she trusts the most. They'd come so far in their relationship and hearing how much Zelena believed in her relationship with Emma really made Regina's heart feel full. However, she couldn't break her facade of indifference, so she rolled her eyes and took a few sips of her wine. 

"What a lovely hope speech, dear. Snow would be proud." She snarked, pouring more wine in her glass. "First of all, I will address Sheriff Swan as I please. Secondly, how long are you planning on being here?" She asked, smirking behind her glass when she saw Zelena roll her eyes.

"As long as it takes, darling. It seems like you and duckling are deep in denial so it may take a few weeks. Hopefully no more than a month." Zelena said.

"And where is my niece? Please don't tell me you left her with Scooby." Regina said, grinning at the use of the nickname. 

Zelena threw her head back and cackled. "You know she hates when you call her that!" She replied, trying and failing to hold back her grin. 

Regina grinned. "I'll stop calling her Scooby when she stops calling me Reggie. At least mine is creative, plus it rhymes with her name so she should love it." Regina said.

Zelena shook her head and smiled. "You both secretly love it. And yes, I left Robyn with Red and Emma. I figured they needed something to keep them responsible and out of trouble. Plus, Robyn is practically glued to Red most of the time so it's a win win." Zelena said. 

Regina rolled her eyes and smiled. "Yes, well, let’s just hope Robyn is enough to keep those two children out of trouble.” 

* * *

 “Doesn’t it only work for her?” Emma asked.

Ruby shrugged. “I don’t know. I just know I’ve been wanting to try it ever since we got together. I’ve been waiting for the right opportunity and this seems like the best time.” Ruby said.

Emma hummed and picked up the broomstick. “Fuck it, I’m willing to try. Is there like a button or something?” She asked, examining it.

Ruby shrugged again. “I don’t think so. Doesn’t seem like there would be one.”

Emma nodded and passed the broomstick to Ruby. “Alright, go ahead and try it.”

Ruby’s eyes widened. “Wha-what? Me? I thought you said you were gonna try it!” She exclaimed, shoving the broomstick back towards Emma.

Emma raised her eyebrows and shoved the broomstick back into Ruby’s hands. “You’re the one that said you’ve been dying to try it! Plus, if I do it first and something goes wrong then I’m screwed! I’d rather see you screw up first! I’m not trying to get in trouble with Zelena!” Emma exclaimed.

Ruby huffed and glared at Emma. “Some friend you are. What a fucking wimp. Fine I’ll go first, but only because I’m not afraid of Green like you are.” Ruby said, swinging her leg over the broom.

Emma snorted and crossed her arms. “Sure, I’ll pretend I believe that.” Emma stepped back as she waited for Ruby to take off on the broom. They both waited for a couple of seconds, but nothing happened. Emma frowned. “Why isn’t it moving?”

Ruby shrugged as she examined it. “I’m not sure. I know I’m sitting on it right. It should be floating by now.” Ruby said, turning around in circles, hoping it would activate.

“Are you concentrating? It’s a magical broom, you have to concentrate.” Emma insisted. 

“Of course I’m concentrating! Not everyone has magic like you do, so it’s a little harder for me!”

Emma frowned. “What? Dude, of course you have magic!”

Ruby shook her head. “No, I don’t!”

“Then explain how you turn into a wolf!”

Ruby stopped turning in circles and rolled her eyes. “Dude, that’s a different kind of magic. I can’t wield the stuff like you can.”

Emma hummed. “Here, let me see.” Emma said, switching spots with Ruby. She swung her leg over the broom and concentrated on her magic, willing it to connect to the broom. She had no idea what she was doing.

“Holy shit!” Ruby whispered.

“What?” Emma opened her eyes to look at Ruby, but gasped when she saw that she was hovering a few feet above the ground. “Holy shit…I did it!”

“Can you drive it? Like make it go around and stuff?” Ruby asked.

Emma shrugged. “Let’s see!” Emma willed the broom in the direction that she wanted, causing the broom to jerk in the direction of the kitchen. “Shit!” The broom started jerking around randomly, causing Ruby to howl with laughter.

“Dude, you look like you’re riding a mechanical bull!” Ruby said, through her laughing. “No no no, you look like Harry when he first tried to ride his broom!” She shrieked, tears coming down her face from laughing.

Emma grunted as she tried to get control of the broom. “Ru-by! Help me!!!”

Ruby finally calmed down and started chasing the broom and Emma around the living room. “You’re the one who has magic! You stop it! Stop panicking!”

Emma took a deep breath and tried to calm herself down. Once she was calm, she realized she had stopped jerking. She relaxed, letting out a sigh of relief. “Okay okay, I got it.” She said, slowly floating around the living room. She floated down towards Ruby. “Wanna get on?” She asked with a smirk.

“Hell yeah! You think we can take it outside?” Ruby asked.

Emma shrugged. “I don’t see why not. It’s almost midnight so I don’t think anyone will really be out this late. Should we take Robyn?”

“Hmm, it seems like it’s irresponsible to leave her here alone, but it also seems irresponsible to take her with us.” Ruby said.

Emma hummed. “Maybe you could put her in the baby carrier thing! Like the one you put on your body! That’d be safe right?”

Ruby snapped her fingers and grinned. “Hell yeah! I’ll be back.” Ruby said, taking off down the hallway to Robyn’s bedroom. A few minutes later she came back to the living room wearing the baby carrier with a sleeping Robyn inside of it. “Okay, she’s asleep so let’s try not to wake her up.” She said, hopping on the broomstick behind Emma. 

Emma turned around to look at Robyn and frowned. “Dude, why’d you wrap a diaper around her head?” She asked. 

“I figured she might need some extra padding! Just in case.” Ruby reasoned.

Emma nodded. “Good idea. I’ll put a protection spell around her too, just in case.” Emma said, waving her hand over Robyn. “You think we’ll need helmets too?”

Ruby shrugged. “Can’t be too careful.”

Emma nodded and with a wave of her hand, helmets and protective padding appeared on both of them. “Uh, shouldn’t we open a window or the door, so I can fly out?”  

“I just thought you would poof us outside.” Ruby said.

“Oh, yeah I can do that.” Seconds later, a poof of white smoke engulfed them, and they were outside hovering above the ground. “Ready?” Emma asked, unable to hold in her excitement.

Ruby grinned and held on to Emma. “Hell yeah! Let’s fly this thing!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ruby and Emma are absolutely wild, but do you really expect anything different from them?
> 
> Regina and Zelena living together? That's going to be interesting for sure!
> 
> Comment and tell me some things you'd like to see in the next upcoming chapters!!!
> 
> Tumblr: alotofunsteady


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